Into the Universe

Slowly but surely, I must be dying. For I have never in my life felt at such peace. My body is adrift, my mind is afloat, and I think I can feel the universe, softly brushing against my consciousness. I try to lift my arm, but it doesn't seem to cooperate. I try to breathe in deep, but my chest doesn't want to expand. I try to open my eyes and to my surprise it is the only part of me that seems to be functioning.

As my eyes slowly come into focus, it's as if I am seeing for the very first time. The black edges of my vision give way to the most vibrant of colors, and the longer I try to focus on these colors that I have no name for, the more elusive they seem to become. These colors are shifting and dancing in the periphery and I give up on trying to wrangle them into my line of sight.

Geometric shapes that are lined in neon pulsate and grow until I feel so infinitely small that I become intimidated. Where am I again? What am I again? Oh, I remember now; I am nobody. I am miniscule and infinitely lost in this cosmic tunnel. What is that? In the far off distance, past the fractals and orbs, beyond the vast expanse that is softly cradling me, I see a tiny light. A tiny green light. A tiny green light that somehow I know will have all of the answers. But how will I ever get there?

As I ponder the sadness of missing out on what is surely a piece of my destiny, my fate if you will, I begin to slowly slip toward that tiny pinpoint. As long as I focus on everything I want, with everything that I am, I gently move forward towards my goal. It's so strange, just to slip through the darkness. I try not to become distracted, but it feels nearly impossible.

Where am I going? Where am I again? Oh right! The answers to all of my problems. The answers to how to achieve everything I have ever desired. As I feel a sensation deep in where my chest would be, if only I could feel it, the space where I am suspended changes and morphs. It slowly transforms into an any inky black before fading to grey, to the most brilliant shade of green. Just like that light. Oh right! The light! I look ahead to find that tiny bead of hope, the sole focus of my existence and find myself hurtling towards it now. When did I begin to move so fast? My heart begins to race. I have a heart! My lungs begin to contract. My arms and legs begin to tingle. I can feel how close I am to getting everything I have ever searched for. As just as I collide with this tiny green light, my vision suddenly explodes and I am blinded.

I blink my eyes to adjust and I find myself staring into the bluest of skies. I am laying on my back and I slowly look to my left and right, and the grass is so vibrant that it feels deeply familiar. I feel my legs and arms gently surrounded by the soft earth, and it's then that I realize my hearing is just now coming into focus. A breeze rustling the trees, the sound of insects in the dirt next to my head, and a soft lapping sound. Where am I? Oh right, the lake. What was I looking for again?

I can't say that I care to remember. I feel at peace. I take a few more breaths before I slowly sit up and take in my surroundings. Everything feels more, and I think I will sit here awhile longer. Enjoying these sensations. An odd combination of disoriented and clarity. Where am I again?