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Good Show!

Two businessmen discuss sports.

By Skyler SaundersPublished about a year ago 1 min read
Good Show!
Photo by Joshua Hoehne on Unsplash

Ice clinked in a glass in a skybox to an arena. It would be two more months until the arena opened, but executives Tyree Cossick and Voro Simpkins enjoyed the champagne, cognac, whiskey and cigars of the plush box.

“I see all sports playing here. You do know what each is about right?” Cossick asked.

“I feel you’re about to tell me.”

“It’s simple. Baseball is the American version of sex. ‘Did he get to second base?’ Did he hit a homer? Was it a goddamn grand slam?!”

“I see.”

“And soccer or fútbol is the world’s view on sex. The constant plays and the search for that orgasmic goal! is just like bedroom traffic.” Cossick grinned and imbibed whiskey. “Now, basketball? That’s mercantilism. You want to have high scoring games. People always talk about assists and unselfish crap, but the truth is you care about the points more.”

“Okay….”

“So football is obviously war. It’s a game of collisions and an intense battle over real estate. With every play and crushing maneuver, the stakes rise higher. The fight is all about demoralizing your opponent until he no longer wants to play.”

“What’s hockey?” Simpkins asked.

“Hockey is war on ice. It’s brutal and rough-and-tumble. But it’s graceful in the way war must be fought honorably.”

“Those are the big five sports though….”

“And? They’re multi-billion-dollar institutions of the planet. I’m just giving you the idea behind all of them,” Cossick outlined.

“That’s great, but this complex will be the space for all the different metaphors you named. I mean everything will fall into place once we figure out how to transform this building for all the different activities.”

“So sex, money, and war drive all of this?”

“What else would? They drive other entertainment:, musicals, movies…we’re putting on shows!”

Microfiction

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Skyler Saunders

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