Going Out of Business
The Golden Ticket for Recouping a Dying Factory
William sat behind his desk, scouring a wasteland of paperwork; PAST NOTICE, Overdue, Collections. The frayed bill edges reflected the wild hair atop his head.
He squinted harder at the documents.
William's factory once set the standard for an entire industry--all the rage for a generation. Now he was simply a novelty, talked about but rarely purchased.
He didn't need a marketing strategy, he needed something drastic, like that Kansas girl that'd made her whole house disappear.
He needed someone to believe in the magic.
William stood, donned the royal purple Wonka coat.
It'd be different this time.
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Not There
He always touched me like he was checking I was still there. Not urgently. Not roughly. Just a hand on my wrist, my shoulder, the small of my back when we moved through rooms together. A habit I learned to expect before I learned to question. I told myself it was affection, that he needed closeness the way some people need reassurance. I never pulled away. I didn’t want him to think I could disappear again.
By Courtney Jones6 days ago in Fiction
Comments (15)
Simply brilliant. Thoroughly enjoyed the read.
This is awesome! Loved the twist
Great story with so much buried in so few words. 🥰🥇
Zack, I am simply in love with this story! I love the nods to Willy Wonka and to Wizard of Oz! This was such a great little story, but I'm wanting more! I'd love to see this turn into a larger story. But perhaps that's just the Wonka fan in me! 💜
Wonderful story. Well done.
This is fantastic! Love the Oz reference.
Brilliant. Nicely done.
Oh, I love this! So well-written, and extremely clever :)
You had me at William. 🖤 This is so damn good, Zack. I love it. It's not just well-written, it has a dark whimsical style that is so reminiscent of Roald Dahl. Brilliant stuff!
I had a hint when you mentioned William's Factory that this was going to Wonkaland. Your delivery was seamless. You brought out the sad side of being on top one day and virtually losing it all the next. Great job!!!
Oh, nicely done! The golden ticket had me thinking :) The old movie version was always one of my daughter's favorites. Wonderful work on this one!
Outstanding! did not see the Wonka factor coming. Very good!
Sweet! Though I guess nothing of human design is truly "Everlasting".
Excellent! The Kansas girl got me thinking and then BAM, Wonka coat. Great job capturing the emotions here. I think we need a prequel. Loved it!
You gave it to me on a plate at the beginning and I still didn't see it! Masterful 😁