Dying Echo

Ava stood with her eyes closed, the wind brisk and stinging like a rubberband snapping against her skin. She titled her face to the sky and let the cold bite and gnaw at her skin as she waited for numbness to set in.

She opened her eyes once more to stare at the scene in front of her. Almost the entire school had come out to the pond to skate that day. The cold snap they’d been experiencing made for strong, thick ice, smooth and reflective as a mirror, perfect for skating—just stay away from the thin ice at the center of the pond, all the parents had warned. Ava didn’t care about skating, didn’t really have any friends to meet up with. The only lure had been him.

Her eyes found Narciso almost immediately. His golden hair glinted and sparkled even on a dreary and overcast day like that day. It was as if the few rays of sunlight that were able to filter through the clouds felt compelled to paint his head in a gilded caress. Ava understood that call and felt a kinship with the errant light.

He was beautiful, a classical painting brought to life. Straight nose and square jaw juxtaposed with the curve of his lips, making him a study in contrasts. He was beautiful and he knew it. Ava watched him every chance she could and knew he couldn’t pass a mirror or window without admiring his own reflection. She didn’t think it made him conceited—she like that he knew his worth. If she were him, she’d always be admiring her own reflection.

But she wasn’t him, she was Ava. Unremarkable dull brown hair, too-prominent nose, crooked smile. There was nothing about the way she looked that garnered attention, not even negative. She passed through life as gossamer as a spider’s web, as incorporeal as a breeze. No one noticed her, even her teachers sometimes got her name wrong. She was convinced that she could fade away and no one would know.

Most of her wanted to vanish, to dissolve, to forget, to become the wind that lets birds fly—then at least she’d have a purpose. But part of her rejected that. She wanted to be seen. No, she wanted him to see her. He’d dazzled her from the moment she’d first laid eyes on him, bright and beautiful and everything she wasn’t. She’d watched him carefully for years, anonymous in her own life, and knew he wasn’t like everyone else—he was better. She wanted to break through to him, to have him see her just once. Maybe then she wouldn’t feel like a ghost haunting the living. If she could just make him see her, could just pull off the blindfold he’d been wearing.

Ava looked to the center of the pond and made a decision. He was a good person, surely he’d notice she was in danger and help her, even if no one else would. She began to skate toward the thinner ice, taking her time and giving him ample opportunity to notice her. For someone to notice her. Any minute now.

She heard the ice squeak, heard it shift and make room to support her as it groaned in a way she felt in her teeth, but she kept moving. The creaks and groans became louder, but she ignored them. Just a bit farther and surely he’d notice her.

There was a sudden large crack and then she was surrounded by shocking cold and devastating black. She felt the air freeze in her lungs as she floated, not sure which way was up and which was down. She opened her eyes and saw the surface above her. She kicked her legs awkwardly, the movement stilted by the skates on her feet and the cold seeping in and stiffening her muscles. She just had to get to the top.

She reached for the surface but was stopped by a wall of ice. She started to panic—she’d somehow floated away from wherever she'd fallen in. Had anyone seen her disappear into the cold, icy waters? Was she so invisible that no one had heard the ice break beneath her?

Ava drifted as she banged on the frozen surface, trying to break free or to get someone to notice her. She was about to give up hope when someone skated directly above her. She hit the barrier with all her might, arms feeling like blocks of ice themselves, willing the person above to see her. The form crouched down and her eyes widened—it was him. He was going to save her. She smiled and began hitting the ice harder, sure that between the warmth of his beauty and her renewed efforts the ice would shatter and she’d be free. He looked directly into her eyes and smiled and she felt hope and love bloom in her chest, which was already burning from lack of air.

But he didn’t make a move, just looked into her eyes and smiled as he ran a hand through his hair. Her heart stuttered. He wasn’t seeing her, only his reflection. She was still as invisible as gravity, as intangible as air.

He looked up and waved to someone before rising and skating away. She stared at the sky, cloudy and mercury stained through the ice. She said his name once before inhaling, feeling the shock of ice-cold water filling her lungs. Her heart sank and she sank with it, allowing the cold, dark water to embrace her as the light above faded away.