Chocolate’s Surprise!

Black 22, the second Angel born to Odin and Queen Alazamda, wakes up in the upscale Village of Wrymwood, Jaguni. It’s mid-day and he’s buried underneath a cluster of sleeping women. After the Cat-eared Angel crawls form underneath the pyramid of naked bodies he looks back and smiles, “Ladies.” “Byeee Blaaaack!” They all say in sleepy unison. “Pants.” Black says holding out his hand. One of the women hands him his shorts and Black kisses her before getting his day started. As he’s walking down the hall Black summons toothpaste and a toothbrush then uses them telekinetically. When he’s done he spits into a portal as it’s summoned. “Finally, a day off. I’m not doing a single thing today!” Black yawns on his way unto the kitchen. He opens the fridge, and to his surprise, “Empty… Damn.” Black closes the fridge and sighs. “To the grocery store.” He groans. Black catches a look at himself in the mirror. “‘Ello sexy.” He chuckles to himself. Black runs his hands through his fur and then snaps his fingers to summon an assortment of rings, earrings, necklaces and bracelets onto himself. “Ah yeah.” Black grins. As soon as Black opens the door he steps out and walks straight into his elder brother, Emperor Scarlet 33. Black falls to the ground, shakes his head and looks up surprised. “No. No. No! Not today bruv. N-O.” Black says getting up and closing his front door. “I didn’t even say anything, yet.” Scarlet laughs “Nope. Not doin’it.” Black grunts pushing past his brother. Scarlet grabs Black’s arm and his hand is quickly swatted away. “Listen. I need a favor.” Scarlet asks and Black responds, asking “Why can’t Rosé do it?”

“You don’t even know what it is yet” Scarlet sighs. “Okay. Well, CAN she do it?” Black asks. Scarlet leans up against a tree and answers “Rosé 4 is working all day, mom has her catering a huge festival back on Heaven, so you know she’s stressing herself out.” Black climbs up the tree and sits on the branch above Scarlet. “And that’s where you’re going?” He asks “No, I’m going to Earth.” Scarlet responds.

“Where the fuck is- I don’t actually care. Take Cyan with you!” Black moans and groans. “If Cyan comes with me you’ll have to watch the children, and the house, water the plants, feed the-“ “Fine, fiiiiiiiine! I’ll do it. You owe me!” Black begrudgingly agrees as he hops out of the tree. Before Scarlet leaves, Black’s brother tells him “By the way, Odin’s looking for you.”

“Bruv! You snitched on me!?” Black responds “Didn’t have to. Only you would glue a party hat to his head.” Scarlet says walking away from the tree in front of Black’s house. “He missed my birthday.” Black mumbles “No, he skipped it.” Scarlet says, still walking. “Father wouldn’t do that!” Black says stomping his foot.

“He does it four times a year! Not that I care, I was just letting you know lil bro.” Scarlet waves goodbye without looking back. “Yeah whatever, how long you’ll be away!?” Black shouts. “Just a few days.” Scarlet says as he spreads his wings and flies away.

Meanwhile, there’s a conniving little Angel named Chocolate 80 sneaking around in Rosé’s house. Chocolate spots Rosé where she usually is, baking up a storm. “Okay. I have to get her out of the kitchen...” Chocolate thinks to herself. And then somehow she tricks Rosé into leaving her own kitchen so she can steal a recipe for a special cake. The cake is for Odin, The All Father. As the first Grand Dragon, Odin is larger than whatever Universe you live in. And how do you feed a beast of this magnitude? With billions of calories per serving. Chocolate believes if she can shrink the cake down and trick Scarlet’s wife, Empress Cyan 8 (mother of three with another Angel on the way.) into eating it she’ll be so overstuffed she not only won’t be able to move but she’ll be so disgustingly obese that Scarlet won’t look twice at his wife ever again. Chocolate’s crazy ass is in a very delicate self made predicament. Chocolate knows she HAS to get rid of Cyan in order for Scarlet to “realize” that he’s actually in love with her and not his wife. But she also knows that if she kills Cyan, Scarlet will be plagued with grief and then if he finds out it was Chocolate that hurt the mother of his children he’d never forgive her. On her way out Chocolate notices Rosé had just signed a gift tagged for Alazamda “Love, Rosé 4! :)”. Chocolate snatches it swiftly and tucks it in her shirt.

Black floats down to Scarlet and Cyan’s porch. Cyan’s older sister Amethyst 88 tells him if he’s looking for Cyan, he just missed her. “She went down to the River to pick flowers. You know she be doing stuff like that.” She says. “Alright, thanks then!” Black says turning and soaring off into the sky. As he’s heading to the river a giant piece of paper flys straight into Black’s face. He struggles with it for a second then pulls the mysterious note into view. “Don’t let her eat the cake!”? Black reads.

“Eat the cake? What cake?” Black asks as he lowers beneath the clouds. He quickly descends as he scans for his sister-in-law. “Found her!” Black says as his grin quickly shifts into a frown. Cyan is being offered a cupcake by a Wood Nymph! Black dive bombs then slaps it out of her hand. “Aaahhh!” The Nymph screams while flying away. “Black!? What the hell!?” Cyan exclaims “Don’t eat that!” Black shouts. “Why not!?” Cyan shouts, “I don’t know!?” Black shouts back in confusion. “Scarlet told me to protect you while he’s-“ Black continues “Did Escarlet leave again!?” Cyan questions “No?” Black shrugs “I can’t believe he do this! Is no fair of him!” Cyan pouts “Shit was it supposed to be a secret?” Black asks under his breath. “And now I am hungry. Take me to get food-oohh - Esorry little one, take us to get food.” Cyan grunts after feeling a kick in her tummy. Since Cyan and his brother got married she and Black have spent a decent amount of time together. Decent enough for Black to know that Cyan rarely knows what she wants to eat, but always knows what she doesn’t. So Black isn’t too bothered when she turns down the first three restaurants they pass. As they’re walking through the forest Black gets a sense of danger nearby. A group of Highwaymen jump out wearing masks! Before they can say anything, and before Black can notice their size and fake weapons, he jumps up and kicks Shadowfire in a circular flare. “Estop it!” Cyan shouts as she absorbs all of Black’s fire into her own hands. “They’re just children joking around! Apologize, now!” Cyan says sternly. And in unison,

Black 22: “Sorry.. kids..”

The Children: “Sorry Mr. 22!”

The little Fae children run away giggling. “What is wrong with you? You’re eso jumpy today.” Cyan says continuing down the road. Black face palms and follows behind her. Three more restaurants later, Viridian 60, an Angel specializing in fortune telling through the magic of Tarot, appears out from behind a tree. “What you have for me?” Cyan asks. Without a word Viridian shuffles the deck with her mind and floats three cards in front of Cyan. “Choose… Empress” Viridian whispers. Cyan picks the card in the center and it spins around three times before revealing itself. “Death.” Viridian whispers before vanishing into thin air. “Time to go home!” Black says grabbing Cyan’s hand as he turns her around. “Why!?” Cyan asks defiantly “What do you mean why? What the fuck was that!?” Black says letting go of her to throw his hands in the air. “Escarlet told me there are no bad cards in the Tarot.” Cyan says turning her nose up and walking off. “Of course he did.” Black groans. “Ahhh. Here, I will eat. You’re estressing me out. Go to my house and check on the children, I will be finished by when you come back. Yes? Okay. Bye bye.” Cyan says matter-of-factly as she turns and enters the Noodle House. “I- but- you. Scarlet said…. Ughhhhhh!” Black doesn’t even know what to say. It’s something about Empress Cyan that Black just can’t argue with. “Fine!” Black says launching into the air. “Just gotta get to the kids, make sure they’re good and get back to Cyan as quick as possible!” Black thinks to himself, flying faster than he’s had to in centuries! Within minutes Black reaches the house. “Uncle Two Two!!!” Cinnamon 13 and Lilac 47 scream as they fly out of the house and hug their uncle. “Hey girls! How are my favorite nieces!?” He asks picking the girls up and using his tail to close the door behind them. “We’re gooood!” They respond in unison. “Where’s your brother?” Black asks putting them down “Chrome’s making us cookies!” Cinnamon smiles. “Awesome! I gotta go, but I’ll be back to check on you guys soon!” Black says, quickly making his way to the door. He opens it and once again runs into another Angel. This time Chocolate’s the one who falls to the floor. “Oh hell no. Not today!” Black shuts the door behind him to block Chocolate’s view. She gets up and tries to look in the window. Lilac sticks her tongue out and shuts the blinds. “Chocolate. I have no time for you today.” Black says gently pushing her away from the house. Chocolate comes sniffing around asking for Scarlet, often, always trying to find him. But today she’s trying to make sure he’s nowhere near. The kids already know that Chocolate’s not to be trusted but they have no idea his dangerous she can be. Black lies and tells Chocolate that Scarlet returned to his Heavenly throne for the festival. She leaves but this only buys Black a little time before she returns.

Two days after Scarlet left, a package appears at his door. Inside the package is a chocolate cake with a tag reading “For Cyan. Love, Rosé 4! :)”. - Rosé didn’t right this. It’s her hand writing, but she’s way too brainy to not have written the longest message ever. I’ve never seen her use so few words. “ Black says looking at the package curiously. Cyan speeds by and takes the cake out of his hand. “Cyan wait!” Black calls after the Empress of Heaven as she takes to the skies. “Damn it!” Black grunts flying after her. He catches up to her and steals the cake. “Why are you making this so difficult!?” Black shouts “Why don’t you want me to be happy!?” Cyan shouts, stealing the cake back. “WHAT!? Im trying to save you!” Black yells chasing after the golden winged Angel. Cyan gets pissed that Black won’t let her eat the cake since that’s all she’s been craving for weeks. Cyan lands back in front of her house. Right as she’s about to take a bite Black swoops down and eats the entirety of the cake. “BLACK!” She screams “Rosé did NOT bake this cake!” Black tries to reason with the pink haired Angel. “How do you know this!?” She asks as her bright blue eyes begin to catch ablaze with rage. “I-“ Black starts choking and then passes out as his body expands. From behind a bush in the from lawn Chocolate loses her shit, exposits her whole plan and then starts chasing Cyan around the house. Black wakes up quickly and angrily. He flies into the house and right back out. “Stay inside!” He shouts to the kids before knocking Chocolate out by hitting her over the head with a frying pan.

“Let’s go get you some cake.” Black smiles as he pants.