All I Want

“Oh, hey, there you are. I was kind of worried when I didn’t hear from you.”

“Yeah…I’m sorry.”

“That’s okay.”

“Is it?”

“Yeah…it’s okay.”

“Okay.”

“How are you, are you alright?”

“Alright how?”

“In general, I guess. Unless you wanna go deeper than general.”

“I always want to go deeper with you. That’s the problem.”

“No problem at all. Go for it.”

“You have to promise to listen, though.”

“I will.”

“You can’t just placate me.”

“I won’t.”

“I mean it.”

“I know. I won’t placate. If I say something, it’s because I mean it.”

“Alright…”

“Alright.”

“I’m sick. Broken.”

“You aren’t broken.”

“No, really. I know it’s not permanent or a stain on my character…but I am broken, a little bit.”

“Then let me heal you.”

“That’s what I’m afraid of.”

“Why? Of me?”

“No. Of the idea of you. Of getting what I want.”

“Okay.”

“Okay what?”

“That’s okay. You can be afraid. I’m afraid. Do you think you can be afraid and do it anyway? Do it scared?”

“I mean…I guess so. But it’s gonna be complicated.”

“I don’t mind complicated. I’ve done complicated before.”

“Not my kind of complicated.”

“Well, you teach me how to figure it out and I’ll help.”

“It can’t just be that easy, though.”

“Why not?”

“I don’t know.”

“No, you do know. Why not?”

“I…Because I don’t deserve it to be that easy. It’s never been that way, it can’t be.”

“It could be.”

“I don’t deserve you. I don’t need to drag you down into this and spread my sickness.”

“You aren’t sick. If you were, I’d already be infected anyway, so you might as well let me stick it out with you.”

“You’re doing this to yourself. I have to believe that. That you’re choosing to stay and I’m not making you stay and bringing you to your demise. Our demise.”

“I am choosing to stay. I choose you. I don’t think you understand yet that there’s nothing that could make me not choose you. I hope I can help you understand that, and I’m sorry I haven’t done enough so far to prove that to you.”

“No, it’s not you, you aren’t the problem.”

“‘It’s not you, it’s me?’ Really?”

“I’m dramatic and emotional and cliche. That’s me.”

“I know.”

“And I am a giant mess.”

“Well, I’m prepared to get messy. Let me.”

“Fine. Okay.”

“Okay?”

“If that’s what you want.”

“It’s all I want. Is it what you want?”

“It’s all I want.”

“Let’s do it, then.”

“It’s gonna be hard.”

“Love usually is. Whoever said love was easy never knew real love.”

“And you know real love?”

“Yep.”

“How do you know?”

“I had a feeling, an inkling, and every time I look at you I get a little more sure.”

“I think I love you.”

“I think you do, too. Otherwise you wouldn’t be this brave.”

“I can be brave.”

“You sure can, when it’s worth it.”

“And this is worth it?”

“You tell me.”

“...I think it might be.”

“I think so, too.”