A Feeling Not Too Far Away

A Feeling Not Too Far Away

The wind came rushing through the broken window in the bedroom and knocked a small black box to the ground with a thud. Dust particles dispersed into the air. The box lid fell open and the contents spilled out.

The frail woman standing in the center of the bedroom eyed the contents. Light making its way inside flickered over the old wooden floor, and a shimmery object stood out. The contents were familiar, but it’s been too long to know for sure. She needed to know for sure, so she bent down for a closer look. The objects were covered in dust, most likely from the explosions. A broken comb, a candle, and a necklace. A necklace with a heart-shaped locket. The woman did not understand what it was but she knew it was familiar.

She picked up the locket and preyed it open with her fingernails.

It brought her to a place that wasn’t the present, nor was it the past or was it the future. It felt warm. It felt like home. For that one moment, she felt something again. A forbidden feeling. It had been so long since she had felt any feeling that she could not comprehend what was happening. It brought her to a moment of a gentle caress across the cheek, to a deep hug from a little girl, and then to a passionate memory of two intertwined bodies and the rush of pleasurable electrical current going through her body. She could feel her blood pulsating through deep breaths. It was right there, it was with her, it was her.

“Clara?!” A man’s voice was heard just outside the bedroom.

And then the feeling was gone in that split second.

She opened her clenched shut eyes, watery, with a tear rolling down her cheek. She collected herself and stood up shakily.

“Clara we have to go! If we are not out in exactly three seconds we will be late!” The man’s voice shouted again, it made Clara jump.

“There’s no way I can keep this,” she thought to herself. She looked around and then back down at the locket. Clara stuffed the locket into her bra and trailed out of the bedroom.

“Find anything?” The man looked at her through half cut rim glasses through his protection suit.

“No, nothing. No one has been here for a long time.” Clara replied.

“Then let’s go. The Justice will be here soon to clear out. We are just looking for survivors, not so you can get some play time in. Let’s go before we turn into this house.” A piece of ceiling broke off and fell to the floor.

The ride in the truck was bumpy driving over rubble. Clara looked out the window at the desolate city amongst them. It was grey, defeated, and dead. Memories were erased after the Great World War. Almost five billion humans were erased overnight between bombing and bio war viruses, and the other two billion remaining were wiped out afterwards from radiation sickness. A small one thousand men made it to Mars, but with no resources to send to them or communication they must be gone. So the only way to create life back on earth? To control the remaining few and wipe out all memories and feelings, what they thought created the war in the first place. With no feelings or memories, what is there to fight about? That is what the Remaining are taught.

“How did it get like this?” A small voice in the back of her head asked. “Questions like that will get you into trouble. You don’t want trouble. Remember Alex? He lost his ear for asking about the book that was found in sanction 12. What if I get caught? Don’t worry you’re going to toss it away, no one is going to find out.”

The truck pulled up to a large dome structure and drove through the gates.

The small group passed through the sliding doors and began to strip. Nothing was allowed beyond the doors.

As Clara stripped off her clothes she placed the locket in her sock and then gently laid it on the top of her boot. Then she placed her boot on the examination table. Just before the examiners started on her pile of clothes Clara tripped and lunging forward she knocked her pile of clothes into the trash conveyor.

“I’m sorry, that was my fault!”

The examiners gave her a sideways glance and pointed for her to proceed through the washers.

“I needed new clothes anyways.” She said picking herself up.

“I’ll see you at the dining hall tonight?” Maurice asked after the washing. Clara nodded her head and took off.

An hour later, Clara found her way over to the hazardous rooms. She watched as the workers dumped the trash down the shute or threw items into the fire cooker. She spotted the bag that fell down most recently.

Clara pushed through the doors and crouched down into hiding. She ripped a hole into one of the bags and shuffled through. She found her sock, snatched it, and stuffed it into her shirt.

Moments later, Clara was back in her room. Each person of the American Republic has a designated apartment in the dome. It’s plain and sterile. She is separated from anyone else, the Justice way. The way to keep peace and to build once again. Control is peace. Feelings and memories lead to war.

She collapsed onto her bed and finally took the locket out of her sock and opened it.

This time it brought her to a boy chasing her laughing. He grabbed her hand and swooped her up into his arms and kissed her. Then it brought her to a moment where she was in extreme pain, breathless, and the boy was sitting by her bed holding her hand, and then another flash and a baby was in her hands, and she was smiling. And then she came out of the trance, and for the first time while looking at the locket she saw a photo of a girl and a boy inside. She rubbed the dirt off of the picture to make it clear.

There was something familiar with the girl in the photo, it was in her eyes.. It was her.