When a child says, "you only like your brother, not me," these three mantras are easier to use.

CC's parents.

I boast that I am the master of Duanshui between the two children in my family, but many times I am unable to do anything about it, and I will take care of one child at the expense of the other.

And most of those who have been disappointed are already older bosses.

I think the mothers of the second and third children must have some experience.

Because with Erbao, no matter how well you do, you really owe the boss too much.

I still remember that my brother was weaned some time ago and was in a bad mood. He didn't sleep at night, just crying.

Father C and I took turns holding him around the house. CC sometimes stood against the door frame and looked at us, and sometimes he called "Mom" when he wanted to speak.

CC, who is usually careless, saw his parents' anxiety and wisely did not disturb him.

And I didn't hear her call, and I didn't see her eyes eager for attention.

But I was physically and mentally exhausted and had no spare power to take care of her.

Poor boss, who used to be spoiled by thousands of people, is now prone to criticism and impatience.

"I know my mother is very busy, and I also know that my mother is tired to take care of my younger brother and sister, but I also want my mother to look at me and hug me.

My mother said to wait a minute, but I waited for a long time, but my mother still didn't come to play with me. "

It's heart-stirring, but it's realistic.

Anyway, the boss will have to face this situation after all.

So it's not solved?

Today, I shook out the secret at the bottom of the box!

Tell you from personal experience that this process can be less cruel, there are many small ways to maintain the parent-child relationship of the second-child family, and even help the boss to become better!

The most effective and convenient way to write notes.

This method is really super magic.

I highly recommend this method for parents who have a bad temper, who don't have time to spend time with their children, and who can't communicate with their children.

It can repair and repair all relationships.

It is especially suitable for Chinese parents who are not good at words and communication.

These two years have been the most difficult years for me and CC.

When she went to primary school, her studies became heavier, the expectations of the people around her became higher and the requirements became more and more stringent.

As for me, I began to try new areas of work, and I was very busy every day.

I often go out early and come back late, and I don't like it when I get home.

Sometimes, CC and I are tired and emotional, and often fight without a word.

But then I calmed down and regretted it very much. I would write a note, put it on her pillow and say to her, "Sorry, Mom is in a bad mood today, but Mom loves you very much."

Sometimes I get busy, she takes her brother to play, and when I'm done, I call her into the bedroom alone, carry DD on my back and give her a thank-you note.

Sometimes, when CC didn't want to go to school, I wrote a note to her and secretly put it in her water cup and told her, "it's a surprise when we get to school."

Hey.

CC hopped up and down to school with this "surprise" in anticipation.

The feeling that she didn't want to go to school immediately turned into expectation.

(I also used this trick when I didn't want to go to kindergarten before.).

Children think in a straight line. If you yell at him or scold him, he will think you are bad; if you love and pay attention to him, he will think you are good.

When I could not prove it with enough actions, I hurriedly chose the "form".

Unexpectedly, I got it straight!

The most obvious thing is that when CC is particularly angry with me, she will take all the small notes out of her box, look at them, smile and forgive me.

Children belong to fish, angry can not remember you before the good, only hate the bad in front of you.

However, these mere expressions of love, at this time, happen to be marked as a monument full of "I love you".

Parent-child relationship is like a bank account.

We are not nice to our children, that is, we withdraw money from our account, and every note we love is saving money in the account.

If you save more, you will have the courage to be "arrogant" occasionally.

Every time she is angry with us, there is enough "money" to make CC understand that she is loved.

Parents are only occasionally unsatisfactory, instead of thinking, "you don't understand me, and no one in the world loves me."

So, if you're not very good at speaking, then write.

Write down what you say to each child on paper, just like a special secret with the child, making the child feel that he is special and favored by the mother.

Because of the child who has been favored by his heart, he has the ability to take care of the younger one.

Only a child who has been nurtured by love has the ability to love others.

The more you use the better the child, the better the mantra.

In addition to this method of pressing the bottom of the box, mother C has three more words to share with you. Memorize them until they blurt out, and the parent-child relationship will become closer and closer.

1. "it was the same when you were a child."

Brothers and sisters, there is no such thing as love at first sight.

They are natural competitors, most of the time, fighting for food, drink and toys, but also for the attention and love of their parents.

This is the reason why the second is coming and the eldest is generally regressing to varying degrees.

O "I want to eat DD snacks, too".

O "I want to take my brother's stroller, too".

O "I want my mom to hug me, too".

In the face of this situation, never say, "how old are you, and you should be the same as your brother and sister."

Because, the more you emphasize that he has grown up, the more the child thinks that you don't care about him, and the smaller his behavior will be.

Instead, you can say something like this:

O "Yes, your mother pushed you in a stroller like this when you were a child."

O "that's how your mother held you when you were young."

Not only meet the needs of the child, but also tell him that his mother took care of him in the same way when he was a child.

The child's needs are valued, and he knows that his parents love him, and the second is now playing with what he has left, so he doesn't care so much.

That's what children are like. Sometimes you cooperate with him, and he will soon be satisfied.

He doesn't really want to eat the second son's snacks, nor does he really have to be hugged by his mother, he just wants to prove whether he is still cared about.

2. I really need you.

The eldest of a friend's family is 6 years old, and the second has just turned 2 years old.

She often complains that she is broken down by the two children, crying when the small ones don't agree with each other, and the big ones don't make people worry, and her mother keeps shouting.

From each time