To My Mother

I remember when I was six years old, getting ready in a pretty pink dress with little bells sewed to the inside so every time I moved, I mad a little noise. It was my favorite dress and you let me wear it that day. You didn't want to break my heart and tell me that we were wearing it to my dad's funeral. I remember begging him to wake up and not getting what I want. I remember throwing a huge fit and you taking me out of there with tears streaming down your cheeks.

I didn't understand until I got older that you tried to protect me the best you could. Not having my dad around was hard on all of us but you stayed strong for your kids. You kept us going when I knew you wanted to fall apart.

I remember moving to Ohio and my father's family ignoring you, they thought it was your fault but I never blamed you mom and I still don't. Suicide is hard on everyone but to put it all on your shoulders was probably the hardest thing for you, yet you stayed strong and didn't show how much it hurt.

By the age of twelve, you taught me how to help you take care of my sisters, so while you were at work, I would watch them for you and the step dad. I did what I could because I knew you needed the help.

When I got into twirling, I didn't realize how much it would cost but I'm sure you did, yet you made sure I made it to every competition and every practice. You did my hair and make up even when I complained. You helped me raise the money to go to Florida for the Junior Olympics and went with me so I didn't have to be alone. You believed in me enough to take me to Nationals in Indiana every year because you knew it was something I wanted to do. You believed in me Mom, you still do. Thank you for going to the football games just to watch the halftime show because you wanted to see me and David perform. You didn't have to do it and with five kids, I knew it wasn't easy but you made it work as much as you could.

When I wrecked my car right before my senior year, I knew that you only grounded me because you were scared. I didn't blame you, the State Highway patrol did say that I must have had someone looking down on me with the way my car looked and maybe I did. I'm sorry for that rebellous stage I went through that probably gave you gray hairs. I'm so glad I had you in my corner though. No matter what I put you through and I know sometimes it was a lot, you stood by my side without complaint.

Graduating was hard when I knew my dad couldn't be there but your tears were happy tears because I finally did it. I made it through my high school days. You helped get me through even when I didn't want to listen.

You didn't judge me or try to talk me out of getting married right out of high school even though you probably knew it'd be a mistake and when a few months passed and we couldn't see each other because of his training you didn't say I told you so when it ended. You never made me feel like I was messing up my life or making a huge mistake. You let me find my own way and that's all anyone can really ask for.

I know you had a hard time with five kids, especially when the step dad never really wanted anything to do with all of us. Even though you were married, you acted as a single parent. It probably didn't help that we didn't really give him a chance.

When you moved to Florida and I ended up not moving with you, you came back for me. You moved back to our tiny town because you didn't want to be far away. You didn't want my sisters to be far away. I know that ended your marriage but he wasn't good for you anyway. You deserved better, he proved that with just a few messages after you left.

Being a single parent wasn't easy for you, I helped as much as I could. I'll always have your back mom just as you have always had mine. The point to this story mom is you are the strongest person I know.

No matter what life threw at you, you came out stronger. You took care of five kids better than some that have both a mom and dad. You rocked single parenthood better than some. You never gave up on your kids and taught us what we needed to do to be kind, decent human beings. You taught us how to trust, to stand up for ourselves, to love. You helped us when things got tough and held us when we felt like we couldn't hold ourselves up. You gave us a shoulder to cry on and cried with us because our pain was your pain. No matter if we messed up or not, you were always on our side.

Even now, you do so much more than you should have to with all of us being grown up. An example: Every time I called you in the middle of the night crying because I was tired and stressed from having a colic little girl, you come and picked me up and we would just drive until she fell asleep. You cried with me and told me everything would be ok. I believed you because with you as a mom, I knew you would help me through it.

The hero in my story is you mom. It's you who showed me how to be kind, how to love, how to stand up for myself and not let people take advantage of me. It's you who taught me to work hard and never give up. It's you who made my life worth living and gave me the skills I needed to take care of my own kids.

Thank you for being my hero mom but more than that, I'm glad you're my mother. I couldn't ask for a better one if I tried.