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Tips for Parents: How to Avoid Quarrels When Children Share the Same Room

Do your kids quarrel a lot?

By Tanya SandersonPublished 4 years ago 4 min read
Tips for Parents: How to Avoid Quarrels When Children Share the Same Room
Photo by Igor Starkov on Unsplash

Here are some tips for parents on how to avoid quarrels between siblings when their children share the same room. Often, sharing the room with children is a necessity, given that the living space does not offer the possibility for everyone to have their room. The constant closeness and division of space, however, can lead to much more frequent quarrels between siblings.

Parents will need to help their children reconcile when they share the same room, imposing certain rules of coexistence and giving them as much personal space as possible. The good news is that for young children, up to puberty - when the need for space and privacy is increased - sharing a room does not necessarily lead to more frequent quarrels.

Children like to have a companion to play with, talk to and sleep in the same room (in fact, for the child who is afraid at night, sharing the room with his brother or sister is preferable).

Tips for parents: how to avoid quarrels when children share the same room:

Personal space. The need for private space, personal intimate space is not increased until the age of puberty, the age at which parents should find a way for each child to have their own space in the house (especially if they are a girl and a boy, they should have their own space with puberty, because they need privacy).

But even a small child wants to own a certain place only his own. The solution is to divide the room in two so that each of the children has their bed, their bedside table or table, and their closet in which to keep their personal belongings. Some parents even put a curtain or even a folding door that divides the room in two: this is not necessary unless one of the children shows that he does not feel comfortable in the common space and that he would like more privacy.

Reconciling preferences related to the appearance and decor of the room. An issue that often arises is the preference of each child over the decoration of the room; when they share the same room, each child will want it to look their best - and a child needs a personalized and attractive living space.

It is the parents' responsibility to reconcile their children, decorating the room so that they both find it attractive. Up to a point, the room can be decorated according to everyone's preferences in their part of the room.

Sharing things. When children share the same room, many problems and quarrels arise because one of them can take the other's things without permission. Therefore, parents need to establish an important rule of coexistence: children should place their personal belongings in their part of the room, in their closet; and when one of them wants an object from the other, he must ask permission.

It is good for brothers to be taught both to respect each other's possessions and to share: strictly personal items should be placed in a special place, and common items, such as certain pieces of furniture, books, games, should be placed in a special place. commonplace, towards the middle of the room.

The activities were carried out in the room. When children share the same room, quarrels can arise over what each one does, especially if there is a greater age difference between siblings. For example, while one of them wants to sleep, do his homework, read, the other may want to play, listen to music, thus disturbing the former.

Bedtime can also be problematic when one of the children is much younger. Parents must impose another important rule of coexistence: children will not do anything that explicitly bothers the other; music is listened to in headphones; noisy games, TV, PC must be placed outside their room, in a common space (living); when one of the children is sleeping, the other can spend time in another room or can sit quietly in his part of the room by the light of a lamp.

This room that the children share mustn't be the space for all the children's activities, which would lead to more frequent quarrels; thus, watching TV or sitting at the PC are activities for a common space, for example for the living room; all meals are taken in the kitchen and not in bed; when one of the children has a visiting colleague or friend, they do not have to take control of the common room, but to spend their time in another room.

Room cleaning. When children share the same room, parents should make it clear that they are both responsible for the cleanliness and order of the common space. Many quarrels between brothers who share the same space occur because one of them always leaves a mess in the room, and the other is forced to gather behind him.

Parents can show them that each one is responsible for his part of the room, having to put things in order; when one does not clean, in no case should this negligence fall on the shoulders of his brother or sister; parents should intervene and ask the messy person to maintain a pleasant room.

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