The Rabbit Hole

After reassuring her best friend, Creek, that she was fine and would call him later with an update, Merlot closed the door and went back to the dining room table. She picked up Dr. De Funk’s business card. “Miss Crenshaw.” De Funk answered the call after only three rings. Merlot’s throat was dry. She was nervous and a little scared. “Doctor…”, she started. “Call me Herman. Please. ” De Funk insisted.

Dr. Herman De Funk had been reaching out to Merlot for over two months trying to meet face to face to discuss some “confidential” matters regarding her late "father", Leslie Mole. The only reason Merlot decided to meet with him was because she had had doubts over the course of her life that her mother’s recollections of who her father really was were true. When they finally met up earlier that day he gave her the shock of her life with photos, letters, a birth certificate (her mom said she lost it and never attempted to get another copy) and a $20,000 check made out to Merlot Crenshaw.

“Ok. Her-Herman. ” Merlot paused and tried again. “Herman, I’m sorry. I know you said call to discuss this situation, but we need to talk face to face. ” Silence. Merlot cautiously continued. “Can we meet up again? You can come over for dinner. ” She immediately felt stupid for offering to cook dinner. She rarely cooked for herself due to the fact that she wasn't that great at it. Merlot held her breath. Herman sighed. “I wish I could stay and give you the time you are requesting, but I cannot.” He continued, “With that being said, I have something else for you.”

Merlot couldn’t take any more surprises. Before she could ask, Herman answered her question. “You will receive a small package tomorrow. It will require your thumb print. The carrier will be instructed to make three attempts to reach you before returning it back to me. Can you be home around noon? ”, he asked. Merlot couldn’t wait that long. “Will this package explain why you gave me a $20,000 check? ” His chuckle was harmless, but nevertheless Merlot was annoyed. Sensing her irritation, he cleared his throat. “I’m sorry I laughed. You didn’t read my letter, did you? ” She had forgotten all about the letter. Besides, she didn’t have time to read anything except “pay to the order of” and the amount next to the dollar sign. In an unusually high-pitched voice she answered, “Hell naw!” Needing to collect herself, she took a deep breath. “Listen Herman, can I pick up the package tonight? I need to sort some things out. ” He didn’t speak for what felt like forever. “Sure. Know any good sushi places? ”

They agreed to meet in half an hour. Merlot was sitting at Umami with fifteen minutes to spare. Her first round of sake samples had just arrived when Herman De Funk walked in. He was casually dressed in cargo shorts, a coral-colored Polo, man flops and a standard blue mask. As he came closer, she could see that his feet were manicured. Suddenly Merlot felt beneath his caliber of acquaintances tucking her poorly groomed toes tightly under her chair.

The place was only at 50% capacity due to pandemic regulations, so they were able to speak openly without the risk of being overheard. “Miss. Crenshaw. ” He greeted her while removing his mask. She smiled weakly and offered him to try one of the sake samples. He took one straight to the head without hesitation. For some reason, that small gesture gave Merlot a sense of comfort. Feeling more relaxed, she released a small sigh. “Thank you so much for coming, but I didn’t see a package with you. ” She didn’t mean to be so direct, but that’s what she was there for. She couldn’t even tell if he had car keys or a wallet, though she was prepared to pay. His smile was understanding and compassionate. He reached into his left-side pocket and pulled out a small black, leather bound notebook. He placed it gently in the middle of the table and slid it slowly across to her. “Now can we eat? ”, he asked with a slight smirk. Merlot felt like an ass. “I am so sorry. Yes. Please. Let’s eat… a-and drink. My treat. ”

Dinner was surprisingly relaxing and pleasant. Merlot and Herman swapped stories about their beginnings, spirituality, politics, and their love for Japanese culture. Merlot found herself genuinely interested in who Herman De Funk, the man, was; not to mention he was easy on the eyes. He had a beautiful set of teeth and soft, dark brown eyes; a caramel complected resemblance to Denzel Washington.

Feeling strengthened and refreshed, she finally felt ready to address her concerns about the check as well as the journal sitting before her. “So, what’s this? ”, holding the strangely heavy little black book up to his eye level. Herman wiped his mouth, relaxed back in his seat, and paused looking at the journal. Suddenly he sat straight up. His demeanor became rigid as his eyes pierced into hers. “This book contains a lot of your father’s secret thoughts and movements. ” Clearly Herman conflicted with its contents. “Your father wasn’t perfect, Merlot. He fought several demons. ” His thoughts seemed to take him away for a moment. He started to relax a little. He placed a soft hand over hers that held the journal and let out a sigh. “I hate that this burden has fallen on you, but you’re the only one I found who was willing to speak to me. ” His eyes were apologetic. “Only one? ”, Merlot pried. “Children.”, he explained. “Your father had seven children outside his marriage. You are one half of a duo. ” Merlot’s head started swimming. “Twins??? I’m a… a twin? ”

Herman came over to her side of the table and put his arm around her. Merlot appreciated the thought, but she was beyond crying or feeling sorry for herself. All she felt was shock at how deep this rabbit hole seemed to go. “What did you mean when you said “burden” ? ” At this point Merlot just wanted facts. “I’ve given this all I can give. I’ve run out of options as your father’s friend and counsel. I have only a short amount of time left on this earth and I want to spend it in comfort and peace. ” Merlot turned to look at him. Herman smiled softly. “I’m dying, according to my last doctor’s visit. I’ll be gone by the end of this year. In my letter, I charged you with a task. The charge is to reach out to your other siblings. The $20,000 was the bait to get us here and payment for your willingness to complete what I started. ”

Merlot’s emotions were running high again. “For what???!!! ” Herman gently pushed their hands down to rest on the table, “Your father left a substantial inheritance in the amount of $70 mil… ” Merlot couldn’t hear the rest. She was caught in a fog of memories, lies and manipulations. If these people were her siblings, she was sure they had felt like her at some point in their lives; lost, confused, betrayed. How were they living? Were they happy? Depressed? Alive??? Did her twin know they had a twin out there? She had to know. “I’ll do it. ”, she interrupted. “Tell me everything I need to do, and I’ll see to it that this case is closed. ” Merlot looked deeply into Herman’s tired eyes. “Herman, I’m sorry for all you have suffered trying to right my father’s wrongs. I want you to have peace and transition into your next life with a clear conscious. ” She smiled at him, reached her head around and kissed him on the cheek. “Go home. I’ll keep you informed on my progress. ”

After paying the tab, Merlot waited outside with Herman for his ride. They said nothing. As the Lyft driver stopped in front of them, they turned and stared into each other’s eyes. There was an unspoken connection. They embraced like old friends for a few lingering moments before Merlot opened the rear driver side door. Herman gracefully slid inside. She closed the door. Herman De Funk would be headed back home to the Poconos in the morning. Merlot would be headed back home to go through Leslie Mole’s little black book as well as the other documents spread out on her dining room table. Herman had suggested she start with her eldest sister, Cameron Miller, in Memphis.

Merlot knew her life had meaning and now there was no doubt. The Universe allowed her to go through so much pain, suffering and hardship in preparation for this very moment. She was ready.

She had been pushed into the rabbit hole. Now it was time to see just how deep it went and what ghosts lay awaiting.