Ten Things to Teach Your Kid

It's pretty scary knowing that your kid is going to go out into the world. The chest can tighten up just thinking about the idea that your kid will be out there, without you by their side, dealing with other people and the kind of mini-emergencies and major emergencies that happen in life. But that is the ultimate goal of raising to kids, to get them out into the world as functioning adults that treat others well and that can handle shit as it comes. This is just a short list of things to pass on to your kid so that they can have a working base in order to be that functioning adult.

Car Maintenance

A car is one of the most expensive and most dangerous thing a person will own...and one of the most important things you can teach your kid is how to listen to their car. How to tell when it is making a new sound or when they feel a new thump. Paying attention to what might not seem like big changes can save money and lives.

They should know how to check the air in a tire, and check the oil, the coolant, and other fluids. Show them how to wash it, change a tire, change the oil, replace a light bulb or a fuse, and change the air filter. Just knowing these simple things will keep their vehicle in better shape and save on maintenance costs.

Household Repairs

The other most expensive and most dangerous thing a person will have is a home, whether it is a first rented apartment or their tenth owned house. It is imperative that your kid know some basics to keep it running and safe. It is also a matter of curb appeal and upkeep for the purpose of getting their deposit back or resale value.

They should be shown how to shut off the water, electric, or gas if needed. How to paint or patch a hole in the wall, fix a loose cabinet door, change the locks on a door, perform minor plumbing repairs, etc...but also...to know when the job is too big and they may need a professional.

Home Maintenance

This goes hand in hand with the section "Home Repair" but this is about prevention rather than fixing during or after the fact.

Let them help you maintain the appliances, change the filters in the air conditioner, water heater, and furnace, replace the batteries in the smoke detectors, clean the gutters, mow the lawn, clean the outside of the house, and to relight a pilot light.

Household Chores

This is the one most parents are probably already handling with that whole chores-for-allowance deal (I know I do). It's not child-labor, it's delegating.

Make sure they know how to wash dishes, do the laundry and fold their clothes, vacuum, mop, dust, and wipe down the counters and bathroom. Don’t forget about creating organizational systems and how to maintain them.

They should also know how to tackle seasonal chores including waxing the floors, cleaning the carpets and larger furniture, cleaning the oven and refrigerator, and treating the drains to prevent clogs.

Cooking

By the time a kid moves out, they should be able to make certain basics so they don’t have to eat out all the time. For instance, boiling water; various ways of cooking eggs; how to prepare meats properly, how to select ripe produce. It doesn’t have to be fancy but it should be enough to provide variety.

Teach them to comparison shop by reading labels and checking the price per unit. Show them how to build up a pantry for those busy weeks when they haven't been able to make it to the store and teach them recipes using those ingredients. Teach them meal planning and how to make a grocery list (and stick to it).

Education

Instill a love of learning, make reading a treat instead of a punishment, be open to different ways of learning, let your kids know that learning doesn’t end when you are handed a degree but that it should last for their whole life.

A word on Applications - College, employment, rental, loans, credit cards...explain how to fill these types of forms out so they are providing the full and correct information.

Finances

They should know how to budget and save up for things instead of going for instant gratification, how to set up a bank account and direct deposit, how to split their money into checking and savings, and if you want, how to invest.

An 18-year-old’s taxes should be pretty basic and they should be able to do them without much help, especially with free websites like TurboTax out there, there is no reason for them to be afraid to do it for themselves.

A word on a Credit - this one can be incredibly hard to explain since the system is inherently complicated but it is something they need to learn before they get out there in the world...luckily there are resources for teaching your kids about credit.

Health

Make sure they know what they are allergic to, their medical history and their family's, their insurance information (and how to use it), and the contact information for their medical professionals.

Teach your kid to listen to their body so they know when there is an issue. They should know when to go to the doctor and how to book an appointment, the difference between an emergency and non-emergency medical situation, what medications are safe to take at home, and basic first aid.

They should also know how to maintain their mental health. Show them how to set boundaries with friends, classmates, family, and at work, how to take breaks, how to recognize the signs of burn-out, depression, anxiety and that it is okay to say NO if they just don't want to do something. Teach them that it is okay to reach out for help when they need it and give them resources in order to get that help.

Relationships

This is one of those sort of on-going conversations that should begin at birth and just keep going. Emotional maturity is something that is taught as much as it is instinctive for most folks.

Yes, teach your child that they deserve respect and should be treated well by their friends and significant others...but you can't forget to teach them that they need to act accordingly. They need to treat others with love and respect as well.

A word on Red Flags - Please teach your kid about relationship red flags. The faster they see them and recognize them for what they are, the earlier we can save more of our kids from dangerous and damaging situations.

Sex

If you teach your kid one thing and one thing only, teach them about CONSENT!! But also, please talk to them about more than consent...talk to them about condoms too. So there, if you only talk to them about two things - Consent and Condoms.

Hopefully you will decide to go further than that though. So talk to them about love and respect for themselves and others, how to spot Red Flags, how to protect themselves, how to seek treatment if needed, and how to talk about sex without shame and embarrassment.

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This is obviously just a short list but it encompasses so much. Just knowing how to do these things we think of as obvious, generally easy, and often take for granted, so many headaches can be avoided.