TEA CUPS AND ROSES

It was my closest friend of 47 years, to be exact, who first mentioned my mother's hands. We were enjoying afternoon tea as she commented "Look at those hands, aren't they amazing. I know them so well and they are always there, for support! don't you agree?" and we both laughed joyously as we knew this was so true.

Our gene pool is showered with the "strong woman" gene I'm sure of it, possibly dating back to the first settlers, our mother's mothers paving the way through the harshness of Australia in order to create a better life. We are a tough bunch coupled with an enormous desire to create beauty, build friendships and enjoy life's journey. My mother has most certainly left her imprint. For the most part I felt my mother was too tough at times, as she demanded the independence and the values she believed. I know better now and realise that many of my attributes, abilities and resilience were all born from this. It may take forever to document every "gift" mum has given me but it would be a sin not to mention the ones that stand out and in many ways define me as the person I am today.

It was in those early years around the dinner table where much of the fun began. It was always a given that most nights we would have a friend/guest or relative to join us for a meal. "There is always enough for one extra" mum would say "One more is easy and the laughter we will share and the fun will have is what counts" and so it was and so it is, there is always room for another at my table, no questions asked in fact its my pleasure.

Moving to what now has become a family affair and has been a tradition for the ladies since I can remember, the ever delightful "Afternoon Tea" which is done with style, elegance and a little bit of "Parisienne Chic". The table setting is what we love, it sets the mood as we we lay the delicate tea cups, painted with roses. The table represents an element of care and effort, exquisite to see and silently showing respect and honour for those invited for the day. They will enjoy five star service and feel special because the are special. Champagne glasses glitter, napkins that ooze romance and of course a menu that is perfectly organised to satisfy our taste buds, sandwiches and lamingtons with cream are a must! Presentation puts us in the mood, and we know it will be a time of great conversation, laughter and stories.

My mother was upcycling second hand furniture as far back the 1960's. Somewhat avant-garde in her creative projects, it was not unusual to find her painting an old hall stand (that she had found at a fair or second hand furniture shop). I vividly remember this bright lime green colour wondering how it would finally look? Her style was a combination of French country, bohemian and gypsy I think and things always worked out just fabulously, friends and neighbours often touring the home in awe. Fortunately for me I have inherited this passion and we share a great bond with our ideas and love of craft. The collection or creation of anything that has roses, in particular "pink roses" is a must, it's a world of romance, charm and femininity to escape, a soft peaceful space that encourages self nurturance and rejuvenation.

On to the world of "Fantasy" I think my mum has read over one million novels and seen every movie that was ever made involving fiction and or fantasy. We were made to read as children, it was an activity that we all learnt to do and appreciate. The art of storytelling, the importance of imagination and the rewards that come with finishing a wonderful book and then the joy of chatting endlessly about it and it's characters. What a precious gift to receive, absorb totally in a book or a movie and fully embrace the adventure. Movies bring books to life and books bring wisdom and knowledge to readers. My mother is still an avid reader today, at 83 her mind is as sharp as ever and her love of a good story is alive and well. Every Saturday she takes herself to a movie with friends, rarely does she miss this outing. I am forever grateful for this genre as it has led to my love of writing and my absolute admiration for those who create the fantastic stories, books and movies that we can enjoy and escape. Of course it has been through my mother that the doors to this incredible creative avenue were first opened.

Amongst several of mum’s personality traits a stand out is her acceptance and inclusion of all people. Don’t misunderstand she has a fiery temper and won’t tolerate nonsense however my mum is not the insecure jealous type at all. Because of this we have always been fortunate to have a multitude of different people from all walks of life around. In turn this has transpired itself into my life and resulted in many friendships all over the world. As children we had several Aunties (some relatives others good friends) but all in all a network of great women who have shared our life’s journey. Only recently I wrote a Tribute for my Aunties to celebrate their place in our lives. None of which would have occurred had it not been for my Mum. (Tribute attached).

As I reflect and remember my life, the ups and the downs, the tears and laughter I have always had my mother on and by my side. As a mother myself I know only to well what a tough job it is, you never stop being “A Mum”. I once heard that a mother’s voice will instantly bring calmness no matter where in the world you may be or whatever you are facing. I have found this to be true, and remember it’s importance with my own child. I am so fortunate to be blessed with the mum I have, someone who knows right from wrong, who understands the importance of having friends, of sharing and caring. A mum who said no when it counted and who said nothing when it counted. Cheers to my mum for encouraging me to do the best in life I can and “Go for Gold”. Thankyou to my mum for showing me how to be kind and forgiving, how to “live and let live” Gratitude to my mum for giving me the tools I needed to “get back on the horse” with a sense of empowerment. But most of all a ton of gratitude for all the laughs we as a family have enjoyed and still enjoy today.

A word of advice to those reading my story, celebrate your Mum, cherish your female friends, teach your children all about great women and never miss the chance to share a cup of tea and a chat with someone special it just may change your life.

TRIBUTE TO AN AUNT

The come to us by birthrite, we are blessed that way. Sometimes they come to us through special friendships for the most part through our Mothers and again we are blessed. Their presence is regular througout our lives considered "normal" some would say. In fact when I come to think of it they are always around, in particular those very special occasions you know, the ones that mean alot.

They always stay out of the limelight, however the light shines bright around them with the love they have for us, so subtle and unconditional. For the Aunties of our world want only for our happiness and well being and they give accordingly.

Something else unique about these ladies, is their ability to listen, and they always seem to be happy to hear all the tales of joy and woe. We can talk for hours about life's challenges and expect to receive unstoppable support, we can tell our happy stories and describe our aspirations and know that the joy we feel is also felt by them, truly from the heart. Never seeming to fatigue from out endless chatter, with great care and good judgement they may offer some advice, believing that we know best and we can do it! its a special kind of bond we share.

It's a selfless love they show as they don't ask for praise and never expect to be mentioned, enjoying being part of our life and experiencing the journey with us no matter the path we take. It took some time for me to understand the significance of an Aunt possibly when living away "the heart grows fonder". It wasn't until I gave birth myself that I really understood and got the message loud and clear just how important these precious ladies are. As my life took me to places not even I expected to be both exhilarating and at times so very hard there they were again. Ready willing and able, both hands on deck shouting "Your doing great!" "I know you can do it", "I'm here if you need me".

There is a sense of style and elegance they bring to the table, another way to look at life and another way to see yourself. An inspiration, a good feeling, the favourite flower that brings you joy and knows just when to bloom.

We honour you Aunties and we love your place in our lives. You're a home away from home, you're the sand beneath the sea and the gold at the end of the rainbow. We have loved, lived and learnt from you and you have shaped our lives and saved our lives. We will be forever grateful and will aspire to be just like you when we fulfill our roles as Aunties and join this chosen clan. For the time being we just would like you to know that you are so appreciated and loved and we want to thankyou from the bottom of our hearts to the bottom of your hearts.