grief
Losing a family member is one of the most traumatic life events; Families must support one another to endure the five stages of grief and get through it together.
When The Lights Go Out. Top Story - December 2022.
I see you, mama. Your unwashed hair tied loosely in a chaotic bun. Dark circles and bags ringed beneath your tired eyes, the energy you reserved for your appearance repurposed to surviving till nap time. Your sweatpants and loose t-shirt still bear yesterday's stains, maybe even the days' before that. Even now, the laundry shoots its accusing glare as it continues to pile, unwashed, unfolded. You never imagined it could be this hard, this exhausting, this monotonous.
By Kelly Robertson3 years ago in Families
Our Journey
This is not an easy story to share, but one I so confidently feel as though needs to be written out in words to help others who may be struggling through the same situation. My husband and I just had our anniversary, we are going into our fifth year. We have three beautiful children: Summer,3, Blaze, 2, and Charlie, 1. My husband did not have the best upbringing. Being raised my a drugaddict who barely had her children, we have been very wary about allowing our children to spend lengthy amounts of time with her. She claims to have been clean for 13 years, but right now she is literally a legal addict. Heres our story: On February 18th, 2022, we allowed Summer to go to her step cousins birthday party. At the time, my husband and I were revamping our house, painting, cleaning, laying down new rugs and decorating. My husband told me we should let Summer go. We were attempting to allow our daughter to have a normal life. Because of watching my mother-in-law go behind my sisters-in-law's back and snatch custody away of her children (we also turned our backs on her without hearing the whole side of the story, but that's an entirely different story I will share later), we very rarely allowed her to go anywhere alone with this woman. She acts like she has a humongous heart but in reality, she is vindictive, manipulative, and a plain nasty human being. That evening she brought our daughter home stating, "We would have stayed a little longer but your daughter was being a little bitch." Mind you, my daughter was 2.5 at that time. My husband went to change her diaper and she started screaming, "No, it hurts! Please don't touch me, please." My husband and I locked eyes and our worst fear hit us. He called his mother and asked if anything had happened to her, how long she had been left alone. She told my husband if Summer had been left alone at all, it was only for ten to fifteen minutes. We had no proof, no words from Summer, so, unfortunately it got let go. However, over the course of the next few months we noticed an EPIC behavioral change in Summer. She was aggressive, angry, just mean. My mother made comments, my sister commented on how Summer looked more stretched out then she should. Then, moving forward to August, it happened out of the blue. Summer was in the bathtub, she stated out of the blue, "Mommy, he touched me down here, it hurt, I was scared, I was told not to say." My heart dropped, I couldn't think. I asked my brother to stand by the hallway while she was in the tub so I could call my husband at work. He asked me to put him on speaker phone and ask her if it was a man like daddy or a boy like Blaze. She immediately told us it was a man like Daddy. I studied enough Criminal Justice to know never to ask leading questions. My husband headed home from work, and I got her dressed. When he came home we asked her where this happened. She told us, "It happened at Gromma's we went somewhere else." Well, the only two times she had been left alone with grandma was the party and when she went to the museum with all of her cousins and my sister-in-law. We began looking at photos on facebook to find out what the date of the party was, and as we were scrolling through photos on this young woman's facebook page; my daughter pointed to her signigicant other and said that is who touched me. It hurt. That was the end of it. We reported it to the police. My husbands mother, Laurie, did not call once to find out how Summer was, never checked in. The entire investigation she has done nothing but blame her. She even got so brave as to to tell a family member that she wouldn't take Summer because of the accusations, she wouldn't take Blaze because she thinks he might be slow and all he does is cry, but she would gladly take Charlie from us and raise him as her own. Well, lets flash forward to the advocacy center. Summer came right out and told the medical examiner and the advocate what happened. One thing that has remained the same throughout this whole investigation is that he touched her in a truck with an orange tool. We spent some time looking through the photos of the birthday party; Summer is not in any of them but all the other little children are. Conviently, neither is he. We finally received video footage of Summer stating she told her grandmother that night and grandma yelled at her. Which doesn't surprise me; because when my sister-in-law was a child, she was sexually assaulted, and her mother told her to keep her mouth shut so that they didn't lose the home they were living in. So, now we are being told to get a no contact order on this woman. We did so, we went to court on November 17th. She hired a lawyer. The lawyer stated she couldn't read my writing because it was in blue ink, but yet she was able to pull out that there were other agencies involved and she wanted to Subpoena them. She also wanted it continued so that CPS had a chance to finish their investigation. First of all, she would of had NO access to know that CPS was investigating us unless she herself made the phone call. We believe her lawyer overheard us talking because my mother expressed that it wasn't true. We have never been investigated by CPS, especially when it was determined that we had nothing to do with the assault. My sister-in-law flew in from New York to support us and our sister. Two days after she flew home, Laurie's mother called my sister, Nichole and tried to make her feel bad for coming her, telling her that Laurie was worried Nichole was going to try to take away her visitation rights with her children. Nichole pointed out that if Laurie had nothing to hide; then she shouldn't have hidden this whole case from her. Mind you, Laurie never said anything to Nichole from the beginning when this whole case came about. It also then came out that Summer was in fact left alone at this party, and for an unknown period of time. Her grandmother actually slipped that out on accident. A day later, my husband's Aunt Mary called my sister-in-law, to remind her that Zak and I were not there for her when everything was happening with her children and to mention to her that they did not call CPS, it was the family member that shared with us what Laurie said about trying to take custody of our children. We now have to go back to court on January 5th for this and I am praying hard that we receive the no contact order. This woman has been non-compliant throughout the whole situation. If she would have told us that night when it happened, we would have had DNA evidence, that person would be in prison now.
By Kayla Hillmann3 years ago in Families
Turning Point
When I was 9 years old I burnt my hands on an oven tray, and dropped all the sausages onto the floor. Dad came rushing in after hearing the commotion and started hurriedly picking them up with his hands and putting them back on the tray. He looked angry but also panicked, frustrated, and unenthused, all at once. But I remember his most prominent expression was sadness, he looked as if seconds from crying. I knew he had had a tough day. We all knew. When he has a tough day, everyone is made to know. That day was a tough, rough, day. So when he asked me to turn the sausages for him, I leaped at the opportunity. I wanted to be of use so badly, to be useful to him - because, despite everything, known and unknown to me, I still looked up to him. I looked up to him and I dropped his fucking sausages. I was a little boy.
By Danny Nguyen3 years ago in Families
10 Traditions That Brighten the Festive Season
10 Traditions That Brighten the Festive Season Different nations and civilizations mark the holiday season in unique ways. Some people place religious traditions at the heart of the celebrations. Others simply like spending time with family, sharing a wonderful dinner, and catching up with those who are far away. For many people all across the world, this is also a tradition in and of itself. Throughout the holidays, Christmas songs have long been a tradition in shopping malls. The romantic at heart strategically hangs mistletoe in these locations. Holiday cards are sent and received with thought. On Christmas morning, kids expect to find presents that have been wrapped and cookie crumbs. Some of the more unusual customs that are observed during the most delightful season of the year are included in this list.
By Paul Smith3 years ago in Families
Christmas At The Cabin
We drove up the snowy, winding road towards the cozy A- frame cabin. My mind floods with memories of being a little girl again screaming, laughing, and playing in the snow. Mom would bound my siblings and I really tight we could scarcely breath. Layer our hands with mittens making sure not an inch of us was left uncovered. Dad would pick up the younger ones and put them front seat of the old blue truck. Us older ones clamored in the back. Off we were. First to haul in wood was, cut, loaded, and unloaded by the back door we would all clamor back in including mom, and go pick out the perfect tree.
By Faith MaryEllen Caselman3 years ago in Families
The Triangle House
We drove up the snowy, winding road towards the cozy A-frame cabin. I sat in the bed of the dogsled, him on the runners, our dogs out front as they ascended the snowy driveway at a decent trot. We had been traveling for about 45 minutes, and the snow was coming down pretty steady. We were all ready to get inside and start a warm fire.
By Sarah van Rijsewijk3 years ago in Families
Power Games in Personal Relationships
Recently I've been feeling like the world is a game of power. Not only in politics between the rich and the mighty, not only in traditional verticals at work, but also with our nearest and dearest – our romantic partners, friends and family members.
By Autumn Rose3 years ago in Families
Accepting Help
This week has been hard and it is only Wednesday. I am tired. Really, really tired. At this point, if I could just stop everything in my life to just sleep, and it not affect anything, I would. Trying to grieve and raise three children is quite difficult. I am sure with time that will begin to ease. Even though that scares me...because it means I am fine living without my husband...and I'm NOT fine.
By Christine Hoskin3 years ago in Families
Never Forget Me
Every year on the same day, I sadly sat by the window with the same sorrow as before until the day I was disturbed by the sound of approaching propellers. They were the propellers of a package-carrying drone! It flew by my window to grab my attention, and then quickly raced toward my front porch. I ran as fast as I could to catch a glance of it up close, but once I opened the door, it was gone. I looked right and left, but all that was left was a box. A mysterious box. It was slightly bigger than a shoebox, but it was brown and dull. Ultimately, the perfect distraction from an otherwise saddening day. I picked up the box and began to read the letter attached to it.
By Alexis Dean Jr.3 years ago in Families
