Parental struggles

Parenting is difficult. I say it’s difficult because you constantly question your self about every decision. Did I respond correctly? Should I ignore that behavior? Maybe I was too mean? Ugh the list goes on. I feel like the baby stage was easy, the toddler stage I understood which gave me patience. So let me introduce myself my name is Samantha, My other half austin and I have a 6 year old son mason.

Mason is …. Challenging, he is just so smart and well spoken though he has the attitude of a teenager. It can be so difficult to have the same patience i once had when he was a toddler. Then I would get on his level tell him no if that didn’t work walk him to time out and repeat the process until it stuck. Now he gets upset scrunches up his nose with a mean look on his face and is madder than all get up.

So what do you do when it feels impossible to get through to your 6 year old. I believe it’s a lot of standing your ground, saying what you mean and following through. The best thing that saves both of our feelings is having him go to another room to calm down. When he feels better he is to come talk to me about what we both could have did differently. And I explain to him how what he did or said that was bad has consequences. Now no one I mean absolutely no one is perfect. So there have been times I have shouted or was to harsh and I always try to apologize for my actions as well. I believe whole heartedly that children learn from watching us. So I want mason to see that I can own up to when I did something wrong and I’m working on doing better.

This is the behavior I want him to model. I have always wanted to raise mason to be compassionate, nurturing, strong and independent. When he was smaller it was him taking care of a baby doll so he learned how to be nice to a real baby. It is him learning animals having feelings too and we need to treat them with gentle hands. Then on the other side I want him to be strong, stand up for himself use his voice and be comfortable enough to tell anyone when they over step his boundaries. It is ok for him to tell another child to stop mistreating him he is learning he doesn’t owe others his time if he feels they are being “mean”. Now how do I handle the teenage sass from a six year old.

What works? Honestly I don’t have all the answers. I know I will not hit my son to teach a lesson I don’t judge others who spank their children I just knew I wouldn’t do it I feel as though it isn’t effective. I address bad behavior when it happens. This can lead to some embarrassing moments especially when your in public. But forget what other might say or think if a time out in the garden section of Walmart is what we need then that’s what is happening. One we talk about it and address it. Two we talk about what the correlating consequence will be. Three I follow through with the consequence. Four we talk about what caused the punishment and what can be done differently.

It is not as easy as step one through four even if it works more than it doesn’t. But when your child is challenging and pushing your buttons just remember they are still learning. So set your boundaries and expectations and let them know it goes both ways you have expectations for yourself as well. I hope this is relatable and helps someone out there.