No Sleepovers

I gripped the party invitation in my hand. I was so excited to be invited over for a slumber party. I had to figure out a way to get my parents to say yes to this. I knew that they would say no. Then, I had the perfect plan I would get my homework done, I would practice my vocabulary, I would read the book I was dreading reading and then I would ask. They couldn’t say no then, could they? So I rushed home and did all that, exactly that and I would avoid showing them my latest failing grade until after. It was all planned. I came into the kitchen and offered to do the dishes. My mom had just finished up, so no dishes for me to do.

“So, I did all my homework, I finished reading my book, I practiced for the spelling test,” I said as I stood with the invitation clutched in my hand behind my back.

“Spell Hospital?” My mom asked.

“H-O-S-P-I-T-A-L” I said trying to see if I remembered all the letters.

“Basketball?”

“B-A-S-K-E-T-B-A-L-L”

“Good. Very good,” my mom said as she sat down at the kitchen island.

“So, it’s my friend’s birthday party next Saturday,” I said.

“What friend?”

“Megan’s birthday and it’s gonna be a sleepover,” I said excitedly and I shoved the invitation to her hand.

“Ahh,” my mo read it and nodded.

“You can go” I started to dance “but not to the sleepover part,” and my stomach fell.

“Why not?” I whined.

“You have a bed here there’s no need for you to sleepover,” my mom said. “What will you do sleep on the floor of some strangers house?” She asked me.

“All my other friends are going,” I explained.

“They can do what they want, you are not going to sleepover. You will go to the party but no sleepover, otherwise you will not go at all. We will pick you up at 8” my mom said. That’s exactly what happened.

I begged my parents to let me go to a sleepover every time it was the same response “ you have a bed here. No” I was so ticked off by this. Until I was thirteen did I learn as to why my parents never let have sleepovers at my friend’s houses.

“Man molested children during sleepover” -that’s a headline in the news September 19, 2024. This occurred only three months ago.

I would have this argument every time with sleep overs and my parents. I thank my parents for not letting me have sleepovers until I had one at my house and it was what my friends would call “lame”. So, now that I have this knowledge this rule will apply to my children and will continue until they’re 21, some might say that is ridiculous but…

“Daughter sexually assaulted at neighborhood sleep over” another headline. The teen daughter said it was just a sleep over when the parents were not present and she was assaulted by another teen boy who was at this sleepover. Their daughter probably lied to her parents on where she was going.

Teens can get mad at you for saying no to them, but your job is to parent them and not to be their friend and agree to everything they want. I remember being young and thinking I knew everything when I knew nothing. Now, I’m in my thirties and I see more of the darkness of the world. My parents had a no sleepovers rule and I am so glad that they did. My friends didn’t understand why I was a weird kid with strict parents. No, I was the kid who had concerned parents and rightfully so. At 18 that’s when a lot of serious relationships start to happen and yes it is hard to control what children do but I will never let my child have a sleepover with their boyfriend until they don’t live under my roof or are 21 and have common sense. Some people lose their virginity then and others do too but under unfortunate circumstances and it’s hard getting past that. Anything to avoid therapy is great for your child.

I thank my parents everyday for not letting me sleep over at a boyfriend’s house or a friend’s house.