"Mom, I don't want to go to school", your answer is very important: three true stories, read the child's "inner play"

When I went to my cousin's house a few days ago, I saw her look sad as soon as I entered the house.

When the concern asked "what happened", my cousin crackled and opened the chatterbox, full of complaints about her son:

"you say that people who are going to be in the third year of junior high school next year, their grades are getting worse and worse, and if they fail in the monthly math exam, what else do they have to learn?

Say a few more words, and he talks back and threatens me with running away from home.

Who can teach such a child, his father can not, I also want to give up. "

My cousin's tearful confession was heartbreaking.

This is also the dilemma that most parents face today.

Previously, a survey conducted by the Chinese Academy of Educational Sciences on more than 20,000 families of junior high school students in six provinces and one city showed that:

Most parents in the second year of junior high school fail to take appropriate ways to cope with the changes of their children, no matter in the parent-child relationship or in the way of education.

Parents are at a loss in the face of the "phenomenon of the second year of junior high school".

Once I don't know how to deal with or adjust, I want to give up.

But there is a reminder in "raising Boys":

Never give up on your children.

No matter how rebellious a child is at this moment and how difficult it is to discipline, middle school is an important watershed in a child's life.

As long as parents keep exploring and asking for help, there is always a chance to lead their children to a better future.

If you don't believe me, look at these three stories.

The first protagonist of the story is Xu Xin, who is known as the "Chinese female version of Buffett".

The unknown venture capitalist has invested in invigorating listed companies such as Wa, NetEase and JD.com.

Is the countless Chinese entrepreneurs based on the industry behind the hero.

In the eyes of others, she acted vigorously and had a unique vision, so it was a choice made in junior high school that made her successful.

Ever since she was a child, she was very naughty and often skipped classes with average grades.

Every time the teacher visits her home, she often criticizes her.

Wait until junior high school, close to graduation to make the choice of further study, the students around either go to a technical school or take an examination of technical secondary school.

At that time, people just wanted to learn a skill and get out of society early to make money.

Even her parents, at first, saw that her score was only about 25 in the class, and they didn't think too much.

But suddenly, as if enlightened, she decided to take what others thought was an unusual path: to take a key high school.

Knowing that she had this intention, her father was very supportive and quickly contacted her tutor to give her a small stove to make up lessons.

After a few months of crazy makeup, Xu Xin was admitted to a key local high school, and three years later, he was successfully admitted to double-class Nanjing University.

From then on, she opened her legendary life experience, which was completely different from her friends when she was studying at that time.

Looking back on the past, she confessed:

This choice of junior high school is a watershed in her life and determines her fate.

Very often, it is not that children do not like to learn, or deliberately misbehave and neglect themselves.

It's just that they came to their senses late and didn't understand what they wanted.

If he realizes that he can no longer "muddle around" and has the support and guidance of his parents, it is not too late to start to change.

Once he is willing to change, it is possible to counterattack.

The second story is about my friend.

Speaking of him, the most common comment is: really did not expect him in the past and now, so different.

Before junior high school, he was impulsive and rebellious, and was often punished by his teacher for committing crimes.

Because his classmates disliked him as a poor student and did not want to associate with him, so in the first year of junior high school, he met a lot of young people outside the school.

Everyone called each other brothers, and he thought he had found a sense of belonging.

He joined in when he was asked to fight with him, and even asked him to meet heterosexual girlfriends, he did not refuse.

However, the parents see it in the eyes, but the pain is in the heart.

Once tried every means to persuade him to put his mind on his study and not to go out and make trouble.

Seeing that he does not listen, he insists on going his own way, and can only silently pay attention to his dynamics and take good care of his daily life and diet as much as possible.

Until once he quarreled with his girlfriend and got angry when he came home.

His father not only did not criticize his puppy love, but also had the patience to wait for him to vent, and sat down to talk with him about matters needing attention in heterosexual relationships.

From his father's mouth, he heard for the first time:

"there is no problem with having someone you like. But if you really like her and want to be with her, boys have to take responsibility.

What is responsibility. Is that you have to be capable enough to make yourself better, and then make her better, too. "

Later, a friend recalled that it was his father's words that woke him up.

I have always thought that one person should be responsible for others. I never thought that I should be responsible for others.

On the surface, learning is good or bad is your own business, but it is related to the people who will be with you in the future.

After that time, the friend slowly had an epiphany, determined to stay away from those social youth, and strive to change themselves and make positive progress.

Although the process was not easy, he persevered with the help of his parents.

Later, he was admitted to PGA, majored in psychology at university, and now becomes a social worker who specializes in serving teenagers at risk.

It was that rebellious experience in the past that made him have more empathy and led many children to get back on track and find themselves.

The third story, I would like to talk about the protagonist of the movie "bottom Spice Girl", which is adapted from a real story.

When she was in high school, she was very unpopular with her teachers.

Dress up differently, ignorant, just want to play all day, and mix with the little girls around me.

Even if she was punished by the teacher for hiding cigarettes in her schoolbag, she didn't care and didn't think it had any impact on her at all.

But it is precisely such a "hopeless" she, in the eyes of her mother, is simple, kind and clever.

The teacher criticized her, and her mother retorted to protect her dignity.

Seeing her entranced at the school uniform of a famous school, her mother encouraged her to have a try and take the exam.

In high school, in order for her to find a way out of her life, her mother hollowed out her family and borrowed money to support her to go to cram school to improve her study.

No one believed that Sha Yexian could counterattack from the bottom to college, only her mother and cram school teachers were cheering up in the rear as usual.

In this way, Sha Yexiang, who was constantly inspired to learn, gradually understood the meaning of reading and decided to fight for himself.

When her girlfriends sang karaoke around her, she memorized the words carefully; even in the hot springs, she dared not fall behind.

Her back battle, countless days and nights of struggle, and finally reaped fruitful results, as a wish to be admitted to a famous university.

Just recently, the archetype Sahya made public the good news: the 34-year-old was admitted to Columbia University as a graduate student and dreamed of helping more people.

The story of counterattack in life is rare.

But every child who