Letter to my Uncle

She didn't do anything wrong... Everything that we were told she said or did... lies...

She wasn't keeping him away from us... He wanted to stay away for awhile, because he wanted to know that they could make it on their own. He hated the way that you spoke (still speak) about her, about his best friend (and Best Man.) You don't really even want to be in their wedding, on his side... You are his father, and you aren't even sure you want to be on his side... I stepped up and was proud to be on hers, and when they had to switch me to his, I was perfectly fine with it. I'm starting to believe that the reason he hasn't shopped for his suit yet, is because you're the one stalling...

Let's talk about how you speak about your daughter's boyfriend... You say whenever he's around, it makes you angry and one side of your face burns... and you've told her she has to break up with him, because he has the same birthday as you; you're being ridiculous. You've been like a father to me, my whole life, to the point that, when I get married, I was going to ask you to give me away... but now... Not only do I not want to ask you, but if you don't change your attitude, your daughter doesn't even want to ask you.

I've made a decision that the person that I'm with isn't the one I'm going to marry... He doesn't make me happy, not like she makes him happy; not like he makes her. I thought I could see my future with him, but I was fooling myself. I thought I wanted to get away from everyone, but I just wanted to get away from the people that make me unhappy... You and the other two men that I thought would walk me down the aisle someday, that might not, because I just don't know if I'll be able to look at them...

My grandma hasn't even been gone for six months and the grief partner my grandpa has... he spends more time with her than he ever did with my grandma... You're angry about that too, but only because it's someone, other than your daughter you can complain about. Apparently you've got someone you're talking to, as well... My aunt hasn't even been gone four months yet... I don't know what's going on between you and her, and him and her... He won't talk about it to any of us...

Your son and daughter, my cousins, they are adults. They can be with whoever they want. They have found people who make them happy. Maybe you should just start listening to what they are actually saying, instead of just hearing and seeing whatever you want to. I know you don't want anyone else to leave, we've all had too many losses the past couple years, but with the way you've been acting lately, everyone's going to leave. It's so hard to be around you, and grandpa, when all you do is complain, and drink, and say awful things about your children's significant others. One of them is basically already family, and maybe the other will be, maybe he won't, we'll just have to see.

You called the other night, because her picture was frozen on Life360, and she's on vacation with her boyfriend. They're in Tennessee, in the mountains... That's going to happen, especially if she has her battery saver on. That app doesn't work properly if your battery saver is on. You shouldn't be using it to stalk her, either. She's 21.

Grow up.