Latest Stories
Most recently published stories in Families.
Goggles Or No Goggles — That Is the Question.
Should we get our child goggles? The short answer to this is — it depends. There honestly isn’t a “right” answer here, this is highly subjective and you should consult your swim teacher if you’re concerned. There are arguments for and against goggles in swim lessons and it will all depend on you, your child, and your goals.
By Jessica Trumpour6 years ago in Families
My butterscotch Helen foster
March is women’s history month and I know that we’re supposed to celebrate the famous women in history that has impacted our world as we know it but there are some women that are hidden from the world’s view or doesn’t get the Instagram likes that make them popular but they are the ones that should get the recognition they deserve and that woman for me is a woman by the name of Helen foster she is my best friend my loving wife and a proud mother of three beautiful children Alyssa Joshua and sienna. Alyssa is Our oldest daughter who’s about to finish her studies at Montclair State University with a degree in film while Joshua and sienna who has autism are in the tenth and sixth grade respectively are thriving in their schools all because of my wife’s guidance. I met my wife Helen 16 years old in an on line chat room which was American on line at the time and from the first time we began to talk with each other I felt her caring essence and loving personality which drew me to her and I knew from that moment that I Wanted to have her in my life. We later met each other and eventually got married and she has been my heart beat ever since. I celebrate her this month for a multitude of reasons but for starters is how she has raised our oldest daughter Alyssa who is 21 years of age from a distressful situation when she was five to become an accomplished student and a well rounded woman that she is today because of the love and caring she showed when Alyssa was going thru her Personal issues with her biological father which showed me how to care and be nurturing for my younger children Joshua and sienna but I’ve seen this in Helen when she was working in the daycare field and when she had to watch her older brother Keith who is disabled which showed me someone who is the mirror image of what my mother was and who I wanted to become. My son Joshua and my daughter sienna are both autistic and as parents we went through our struggles and turmoils with each one of their diagnoses and for me personally I have never been thru this before which is why Helen should be celebrated just as much or maybe more in my eyes because thru this journey she has took in upon her self to learn about autism and has showed me how to deal with it and has cared for both Joshua and sienna non stop to the point of giving up her job as a daycare provider and also advocating for their needs and services on an endless basis at times seeing her break Down emotionally and cry feeling that is too much for her to bear. Her strength inspires me to push through in my day when I feel that it is going rough which is why I have changed my position as far as looking at stay home mothers as not being a hard job which is a much harder job than you can imagine but luckily for us we are involved in a state program which pays my wife for taking care of my two special needs children which is a blessing. Also what makes Helen foster so special is her warm and generous demeanor when it comes to caring for other people.In one example this past thanksgiving she had befriended a homeless teen at the laundromat one day who had no parents to go to and offered him an invite to our home for dinner which was a pleasant experience and it showed a side of her that was so caring that the very next day he bought her a coffee mug for Xmas which I thought was so special.Another example of her generous nature was when she volunteered to become an autism advocate for a parent in the community which developed into a best friend relationship that Helped the parent receive Counseling with iep services as well as advice for handing her special needs son who was seven at the time.For me personally one moment sticks out to me when Helen spent time with my mother during her final days talking in the hallway and spending time at Dunkin’ Donuts drinking coffee and snacking on Munchkins while developing a closer bond which I was jealous of but that was my Helen. Being that this month celebrates the achievement of all women we seem to only shed the light on the ones that’s are famous and well known and there is nothing wrong with that they should be recognized and looked upon but sometimes you just have to look into your own background instead of other neighborhoods to find that one who inspires you and make you become a better person and makes you move different in this society.Thank you in advance for reading this and by reading this I bet you feel the inspiration to be a better version of yourself.
By Benny foster6 years ago in Families
With Love
03/10/2020 With Love My wonderful mother, grandmother and artist, Constance Genevieve Brown Koefoed, died on December 29, 2019 as I was feeding her a spoon full of soap in the hospital. She was ninety-six and full of vitality right up to the last six months of her life. Having lost “the other gal in my life”, my daughter Christina Gabriella Milagro Koefoed, almost ten years earlier on February 15, 2009 at the tender age of twenty-two; I find the grief to sometimes be intolerable. Having your only child taken away from you too soon and now your mother, the next most important person in your life for so many wonderful years, challenges your will to keep on going. They were so simpatico and drew together for hours with love, their hands never leaving the sketching pad. When I was angry, my young daughter use to say “Dad, take a chill pill!”. Like her grandmother she already knew life was to be lived with love and not anger. And “Grandmama Connie” was there for all her grandchildren with love. She taught me the world was a better place if you lived your life with no regrets, realizing always that “less is more”. It was her mantra and I believe the best explanation for the reason why she lived such a long and fruitful life. By never saying anything bad about someone was her way of acknowledging everyone and accepting everyone with love. In a deeper sense being a natural artist with the pen, pencil or even the brush made Mom understand human nature better than most of us. Her art evolved in many directions but always came back to simply admiring humanity. This positive affirmation of life with love had to rub off on someone close to her and it did. On me. She always reminded me that everything comes from something. Like the deep love you have for someone comes from having grown up with love. There is spirituality within all of us. We are all like buds in a garden called life, waiting to be nurtured and caressed with love as our buds become flowers among a garden full of variety. I suspect my mother was the flower in that garden that was always a little bit different. No wonder my mother always surrounded herself with plants and flowers. She was that five year girl who drew wedding dresses on toilet paper because art was so personal to her. She was that thirteen year old tom boy who blooded a fellow male student for bullying her sister. And she was that twenty one year old art student during World War II, who was told by the dean that she would be “uncomfortable” dancing with soldiers from around the world, because of the color of her skin. I can only imagine she was the biggest flirt at that USO canteen, saying later “the tall Texans and Aussies were my favorites.” And yes she was on a roll by marrying a Dane in 1950 in America with love, where states like Virginia still made interracial love unlawful. This was a young woman who was deeply loved by both her parents. They taught her with love to follow her passions and dreams no matter where they would lead. When she became the mother of two boys they were hers with love forever. When someone roughed up my baby brother for innocently wiping snow off of his car, Mom tracked the man down and got an apology. When the public school system was failing, Mom found a better education for her “boys” with love. She sent the both of us to a private school. And paid for it as a single mother by holding down three jobs at once. We did not disappoint. Both of us attended Ivy League schools thanks to Mom with love. And when it was the early seventies and America was in turmoil after the challenging sixties, I attended my first antiwar demonstration with my girlfriend in Washington, DC in 1972. And of course with my Mom. She never lost sight of mankind’s suffering and gave to charities with love. The watercolor she created from experiencing that demonstration she named “DC PROTEST, 1972”. It was abstract and drawn with muted tones and shadows, suggesting conflict. But you cannot live to be ninety-six years of age and be full of hate and anger. Her last words to me were “Where do you think you are going?” Nowhere Mom, where you are not going. Only with love can you conquer all. And yes Mom you taught me that.
By Christopher Koefoed6 years ago in Families
Una Mama Luchadora
As a child, I always found my mother to be extremely tough and impatient. I never quite understood how people could stress themselves so much, they begin to reach their breaking point. I have grown up hearing my mother crying in the bathroom shower from people who criticized and have taken advantage of her. Her story begins in Oaxaca, Mexico. Her mother was a strong and independent woman who had to take care of two children all by herself when her husband was murdered. She spent more hours working than with her own children. At one point, she knew she needed the help of her mother to take care of my mom and uncle. Latinos tend to favor a male son in comparison to a female. My mom was abused physically by her grandmother because she saw her granddaughter as an imbecile compared to her wonderful grandson. Fast forward to the point where my mom (Irma) turned 15 years old, whom immigrated to California with her aunt. Irma had to learn at a young age that she had to work for what she wanted, in order to be able to survive. She was able to do so as a nanny, house keeper, and an assistant. She later on married my dad, who took advantage of her, physically and emotionally. Although I was not born at this time, I’ve grown up hearing horrible stories about the brutal beatings my mom went through, all because she wanted to avoid her children being hurt at such a young age, just like she experienced growing up. For those asking themselves, why didn’t she just leave? I’ve asked her the same question for years, my father followed her wherever she went. He was great friends with the police in the area they lived in. Years of torments and being ridiculed all so she could say that her children had a father, unlike her. Throughout those years, my father never helped her get her papers, he knew that she would escape him, so instead he kept her as his own prisoner whom he enjoyed tormenting mentally. The story till this day is still unclear as to how she was able to separate from him but, she was lucky to work for a family who helped her get her papers, taught her English and how to be able to handle her money in order to buy herself a home. This is where I come to play in the story, she gave birth to me at the age of 40 years old. By this time, her main motive was to start anew and raise a child in the house she bought by herself. Surprise, surprise, she was able to do so, thanks to her bosses who taught her how to save her money responsibly. It’s been over 22 years, we still live in the same house she fought so hard to have. Since then, my mom became one of the first construction workers at her school, while being a caring nanny.
By Shakira Martinez6 years ago in Families
Mothers
Sometime ago, I read a quote by Bhagwan Rajneesh, an Indian spiritual teacher, who said that “The moment a child is born, the mother is also born. She never existed before. The woman existed, but the mother, never. A mother is something absolutely new.” IMHO Rajneesh nailed it!
By Marie Campbell6 years ago in Families
I'm Sorry I Mispelled Your Made Up Name
It's 3 days before Valentine's day and I open up my daughter's book bag to go through her folder of homework and things sent home and in the pile is a pink piece of paper that says "Valentine's Day Party" on it. I pull out the paper to read it, as I do every single year, and can't help but say out loud "What the hell is our world coming to?!" On the sheet of paper is a paragraph about the classroom's Valentine party and exchange of Valentine's Day cards and under it a list of 23 names. Of those 23 names only about 4 were "traditional" names. And many of the names had really crazy spellings. Some of the names were so long, I knew there was no way my 8 year old daughter was going to be able to write the names on the cards herself since she still writes large and not very neatly (thank you whoever decided we should not teach handwriting in schools anymore).
By BeautifulDreamer6 years ago in Families
My Mother
This picture means so much to me, you see this is my beautiful mother. She got took from this earth way to soon. I was only nine when she got killed. Mom was my best friend, she taught me so much even though I was young.My mother was the most kind hearted woman I have ever known. She would give someone the last penny she had, if she knew it would help someone in need. She always loved helping others.
By Sara Bevins6 years ago in Families
Study shows Baby Temperament affected by Maternal Sensitivity
A recent study published reveals that a child's temperament may be influenced by maternal postpartum depression, maternal sensitivity, and family functioning. Maternal depression was associated with difficult temperaments in infants when maternal sensitivity was low, but not when maternal sensitivity was high. Family functioning similarly moderated these links.
By Frank Racioppi6 years ago in Families
