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Is He Ready for a Baby?

It's very important for him to be ready

By Lia BartonPublished 4 years ago 6 min read
Is He Ready for a Baby?
Photo by Szilvia Basso on Unsplash

The desire to have a baby is very contagious and can spread quickly from woman to woman. Men, on the other hand, are not usually affected as easily as women because there is no biological clock ticking. So how do you know if your boyfriend is ready to welcome a newborn into the world?

What are its priorities?

If your husband is looking for adventures — or his whole life revolves around work, you may want to wait a little longer before conceiving.

When children come to the horizon, life becomes focused on them. If your partner is an adventurer, you may want to consider that his adventures will change. But, there will be new exciting experiences ahead in the world of the little one.

In addition, the adventures do not have to be completely abandoned - just modified and planned a little more. As you and your partner adjust to parenting, you will learn areas where you can be flexible. As the child grows up an overnight trip can be planned while your little one spends the night with his grandparents.

The husband must know that raising a child requires two parents. It's great that your husband is working hard to make sure the family has everything, but if he's not interested in spending time with his little one, you better wait.

Does he have a reliable job?

Giving birth to a child means food, diapers, clothing, medicine, and miscellaneous necessities. If you and your husband can't afford the money, you'd better wait until your husband has a more stable, better-paying job.

Sometimes simply reducing your expenses can make room for a child. If there is no consistent income, wait until things change. Despite the changes that will take place in the early years, no additional financial stress is needed.

Does he like children?

Obviously, children are children. If your husband is one of those people who automatically gets annoyed when a child is present, he is not ready for it. Children have a lot of questions, they have energy and they make noise.

Someone who can't stand this will not be emotionally prepared for the constant love, affection, and fun that a child longs for from his or her parents. Constantly removing a child as an unwanted nuisance will only create problems in the family.

Wait until you see your husband's heart melt after a child and see that all children are children.

Do you agree with the religious aspects of your family?

Religion affects people's daily decisions. This will not be different in deciding what is best for the child. Do you and your husband agree on the church, will the children participate in the activities?

If so, at what age? What religious or holiday ceremonies will they attend? These questions will arise, and you and your spouse must be on the same team about the events that affect decisions. Discuss these issues now. If you find that you disagree with many of these areas, wait until these issues are resolved.

How is his health?

If your husband is currently experiencing several negative health issues, wait a while to conceive. The little ones need a lot of work and they like to play and interact with their dads. If your husband is in good health, he will have the energy to play and enjoy the children.

Medical conditions can be stressful. Having a new family is stressful as well. Solve medical conditions first, then consider raising your family.

The best way to see if your husband is ready for a baby is to simply ask.

Signs that the man is not ready to become a father

Many men believe that they will never be fully prepared to become fathers. It is easier for a woman, she is given to become a mother. From childhood, he wraps up plush toys and dolls, injects them, reads educational magazines - in a word, gets ready.

For men, fatherhood is an unknown and very stressful situation, in almost all cases. Those who are not prepared for such a thing can be recognized by the following signs.

The most important!

The man next to you doesn't want to share his love with anyone else. He doesn't get along with the idea of ​​being in the background. He wants you to belong entirely to Him alone.

He may be afraid that you will stop feeding him well, that he will be interested in his actions, and that you will pay full attention only to the child. One way or another, this character trait makes happy motherhood almost impossible. He will be the second child, dominated by the fight for his mother's attention.

Money, money

He says he has no money. This denotes psychological unpreparedness. Because baby food, strollers, car seats, and toys are not cheap, he understands that too. On the other hand, some men wait until they can buy "everything that is best" for the child. If you have a home and everything is in order, you can return to the topic of succession.

Brave young man

The eventual father is still very young and does not have a trained personality. It is difficult for the chosen one of your heart to cope with the daily difficulties.

He is aware that with the appearance of the child, new problems will appear, which will have to be solved and for which he will be responsible. At the same time, he is not sure he will be able to cope. This type of man looks physiologically like a young man of 20 years or older. What they have in common is that they are children in training.

He is not interested in the subject

She doesn't like foreign children. He is annoyed by crying, whims and does not try to communicate with children, to interact with them. Of course, you have a different attitude towards your children, but this is temporary. If only the thought of a short conversation irritates him - that's a clue.

Social networks

Social life for the future father is above all. The man understands that, with the appearance of the child, it will be harder to go out, to relax in the bar, to go to a show of his favorite band. And until he's ready to change something in his life, I don't think he'll want to have a baby and babysit him.

He can't take care of himself

You've noticed that dads can't take care of anyone. He is the type of man whose life is organized by the loving woman - wife or mother. These men can't solve their problems on their own. After going through this stage, he will be able to take care of someone, he will become independent and the head of the family.

He lives only for himself

Your partner tells you that he wants to "live for you." It does not refer to an active life with a lot of communication, travel, adventures. Signs that he doesn't have a sense of accomplishment.

He can understand you and accept a child. But don't expect too much enthusiasm and involvement in his upbringing and education. Reluctance will continue until he fulfills his destiny: to plant a tree and build a house.

I don't want to, I don't need to!

To any attempt to persuade him to have a child, he responds uninspired. Discussions about the child's name or gender preferences, the circles in which he or she might be enrolled, end in an argument. And when asked, he replies, "Let's wait a few more years." Such a reaction has men who do not like some features of the future mother. If you clarify these things, the thought of children can be realized.

Attitude towards one's parents

If the man does not have a respectful attitude towards his mother, he quarrels with his father, slams the door, and leaves, it is clear that he has not grown up yet. Attitude towards parents is the first indication of age, about how ready he is to assume certain responsibilities.

All parents have shortcomings. As an adult, he must overcome the offenses of his childhood, be grateful to his parents for giving him life. But do not continue to blame them for their mistakes, failures and leave them responsible for their happiness.

He avoids talking about children

Acknowledge that this is why you have never talked about children. Moreover, after any discussion on this topic, he makes fun of you or becomes aggressive, convinces you to live for yourself - in a word, you can't reach an agreement about a child. And the idea of ​​becoming a father scares him.

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