How Growing Up Through a Stereo Shaped Me.

Nintendo Game Boys, Veggie Tales, and the original Wii. These are just some things I remember from my childhood. A boy is looking out the window, letting the wind run through his hair as he leans out the window. That’s my oldest brother, we’ll call him Wiz. Adjacent to him, we have a bald baby playing with a Larry-Boy, affectionately called “Toilet Man” (Veggie Tales) action figure; that’s my older brother Bud. We’re a year apart. Then there’s my sisters, Pat and Kay, kind of quiet souls, but the radio is playing, so there’s some life in them.

In the middle of all the action: Hi, two-year-old me. We’re all in the back of the family Durango; it’s a fun scene. The song “Lean Back” by The Terror Squad (ft. Fat Joe) is on. To my family's surprise, I’m babbling along. Ears perk up at my first words: “Lean back…”

“Oh my god…” Kay says in shock.

Shortly after this, give or take weeks or months, depending on perception of time, I stopped. Stopped talking, stopped walking, started crawling; went silent. It was scary. I’m three years old. Developmentally, I should be walking, I should be talking. But hey, that’s what you get when you’re disabled. It’s a toss-up most days if I can even get out of bed.

Speech and physical movement came and went over time, and now I can’t stop talking to save my life. I will burn myself out physically if it means I can get everything done on time. I feel bad asking for help. Music is my therapy. It’s a funny thing, really. How can you stop voicing opinions, but still listen to others?

With Dad, it was a lot of rock heavy music. Def Leppard, Poison, Journey; that kind of thing. I had every one of Def Leppard’s songs from Hysteria memorized by the time I was eight years old. But it was also N*SYNC, and The Backstreet Boys, and Vanilla Ice. It’s a spectrum. I am a spectrum. I can be tough as nails one minute, and have a pep in my step the next.

Backstreet Boys’ “I Want it That Way” is one of my favorite songs by them, it taught me about love and appreciation of the spirit and soul someone gives. Meanwhile, Def Leppard’s Photograph taught me about holding on to the little things in life, even if they walk out on you. One day, time will pass you by, you’ll want it back, but at least you have the memories.

Because of my extensive knowledge of lyrics, my dad used to cover up the stereo screen and ask me, “Who sings this?” This ‘game’ expanded over time into testing me with whatever came on the jukebox at the diner-style restaurant near my hometown, where they play old and new “classics.” We still play when we go out as a family.

Guns N’ Roses “Knockin’ on Heaven’s Door” is a very prominent part of my life. “It's gettin' dark, too dark to see / Feels like I'm knockin' on heaven's door,” my grandmother (mom’s mom) passed earlier this month, September 5th to be exact. That’s also my grandfather (dad’s dad)’s birthday, and my late dog’s birthday, and one of my best friends’ birthdays. It wasn’t a sudden passing for any of the late ones mentioned; time got to them, and sickness can be a biter.

This song also gets me for the beginning “Mama, take my guns from me / I can’t shoot ‘em anymore / Mama take this badge from me, I don’t need it anymore.” My grandfather (mom’s dad) was a member of the Reconnaissance Training Company in the Marines. They had a 21 guns salute for him, I believe. I don’t fully recall, I was five when he passed. The song “21 Guns” by Green Day makes me think of him too, his name was Phil, well Harry, but he preferred Phil. Don’t ask me why.

My Mom listens to anything and everything, mostly pop music and sometimes rap. She listened to a lot of Prince and Queen when I was growing up. But we also sang along to songs on the radio together. Car rides in my family consist of what we call “car bands.” Everyone has a different role for the different instruments in the band. I am always the singer, I took choir as a kid. I’ll never quit my day job, but it’s fun. My brother was on air guitar, my mom was an air bassist, my dad did the drums (he’s typically the one driving). If we’re in my mom’s car, she’ll tap on the steering wheel, that’s her “drumming.”

My Dad used to sing “Hello” by Lionel Richie and “Arms Wide Open” by Creed to help me fall asleep when I was a baby. He used a colorful crayon ball and rhyming songs to help me learn my colours and get into kindergarten. I still cry to “Arms Wide Open.” I smile at “Hello.”

I’m more of a “divorced dad rock” listener myself. Creed goes into that genre, Hoobstank, The Cab, and Def Leppard, sometimes depending on the song and the album. But I also listen to Emo music, or at least what we classify as emo music. Panic! At The Disco, My Chemical Romance, Mayday Parade, Dashboard Confessional. Those were my teenage years.

Now I listen to more of what was popular with my friends when I grew up, One Direction (and the members’ solo work), The Vamps, 5 Seconds of Summer. I have an obsession with nostalgia.

As I got older, my annoyance with ‘their time’ grew as well. But, music was what bonded us. If I didn’t have that, I wouldn’t have any knowledge of who they were back then, and I wouldn’t have the basis for my identity today. The worldviews, song topics, and stories they told with their experiences all shaped me into who I am. Grey.

Work Cited

MARINES: The Official Website of the United States Marine Corps. Advanced Infantry Training Battalion. https://www.soiwest.marines.mil/Units/Advanced-Infantry-Training-Battalion/Reconnaissance-Training-Company/. Accessed 30 September 2025