Happy Christmas and a Merry New Year!

It's Christmas yet again and I must say that I miss being a child at times. So innocent. So naive. So full of hope. Although I always knew my parents were in fact Santa, everything felt light and full of joy then. From the Christmas movies to the Christmas music (and I'm not referring to the horrible covers we are subjected to as adults), Christmas was definitely my all-time favorite time of the year. Especially since my parents always went all out and bought us almost any toy we desired. Whether that was an American Girl Doll, an entire train track, game systems galore, you name it, they bought it! Let's go back in time.....

Holiday Traditions

Christmas was my family's favorite holiday, so we were always actively celebrating this cheerful time of year. We would drive through certain neighborhoods that lit up their streets annually to our delight. I also recall waiting for certain Disney Channel movies to come on to watch with the family or enjoy by myself. It was also a must that we catch Charlie Brown every year for each holiday and we also enjoyed other classics like "Rudolph" and "Frosty the Snowman."

We visited church for Christmas Eve for many years to attend the traditional biblical play "The Birth of a King." I was also in many programs myself throughout elementary school and my grandmother's church. I always had a knack for performing so I would speak at my grandmother's church each year for Christmas and I would sign up to perform in different fun and jolly programs in school.

Also, each year we would give our teachers small gifts, cards, and candy, to show our appreciation. Of course, because my mother began this tradition, and I didn't like, you know, every teacher, who's to say those cards weren't ripped to shreds and I ate their candy, I mean why would you think that?

However, because I love surprising others with warm gifts, I did enjoy surprising some of my favorite and most impactful teachers. Teachers like my English instructor, Mr. Tanig, who was quite stern yet very thorough ended up being one of the main reasons I love writing today! Gifting teachers like him felt very special because he wasn't everyone's favorite but he knew what was best for our advancement and pushed us to be great!

Gifts and Glee

I miss sneaking to open gifts, so excited for surprises and non-surprises. I miss being recorded in the jammers (pajamas) displaying what I got for a little family show and tell. I miss the imagination and creativity that filled the air in our home in the early Christmas morning. I miss the special gifts I received like cd's each year because my parents knew how much I enjoyed music.

Definitely can't take for granted the expensive gifts like my very first Mp3/MP4 iPod! Don't want to leave out legendary gifts like my very first mini-game system, you guessed it, "the!" Game Boy Advance. For all my gamers out there I'm sure you miss that glorious intro when turning that bad-boy on. A few years later I received my very first game console. Asking my parents for the Playstation 2 was probably the best decision I made in life (Laughs). This console opened me up to a world of games and is what influenced me to be a gamer today. If it weren't for me my brothers would have been playing with action figures all their life (Laughs Hysterically).

We probably sound like the perfect family don't we? Ha, well my family definitely is in fact, a FAMILY but during this special time of year, tensions from the year were at a low, and unity formed as we brought in the new year. No one ever said it would stay this way though, so don't HOLD YOUR BREATH!

Reminiscent Scents and Sounds

You just cannot have the holidays without things that remind you, of the HOLIDAYS! Our cars and home were filled with Motown Christmas hits, John Legend, Frank Sinatra, Mariah Carey of course, and so many other classics! If you asked me to name music that feels like Christmas but isn't, I will proceed to tell you Stevie Wonder's Essentials. This album is definitely a classic in our household and was frequently jammed throughout the year. However, it was purchased back in the fall of 2005-2006 and was played all throughout that Christmas. During that time, my family was probably the closest we would ever be and that moment in time was one of the most magical Christmases yet. So every time I hear songs like Sir Duke, I think of this particular Christmas.

Burning wood, vanilla/cupcake scented candles, certain perfumes, and hot chocolate are all scents that send me back in time. Each scent is full of detail and filled with memories. Crisp wind, no mosquitoes, and clear skies are typically my Houston Christmas experience. During this time of the year, Houston's weather is the most pleasant it will ever be. With highs of 70 and lows of 40, you can still enjoy perfect patio weather.

Furthermore, it is quite a rare occurrence that we receive snow. However, when we do, it is a major event! If you live in Houston when it snows, you know school may be canceled and people may stop on the side of the road to take in the brief Winter Wonderland. Whatever the case may be, snow is a major deal in Bayou City.

The Shift

Now, I don't even count the days until the "Merry" day. I have grown out of these traditions. So wrapped up in self-improvement and advancement. So wrapped up in world affairs and new beliefs. While also working on detaching from worldly things and being more in tune with my higher self.

This year I must say, felt like slowly removing a scab. Full of pain, full of shadow work, full of meltdowns, full of breakthroughs, full of realization, full of family. Full of heartbreak, full of lost relationships, full of opportunities, full of spirituality, full of tragedy, full of creativity, full of truth.

These days it warms my heart more when I am giving to someone instead of them giving to me for Christmas or any other time of the year. So many things have shifted. I am completely out of touch with the world and am seeking balance with a lot of variety.

Not to ruin your holiday cheer, but I feel like holidays in the U.S. are more about consumerism than anything. Your tradition is what you make it. Every day should be an opportunity to give, do not wait for December to start being in a "giving mood." I believe we should start shifting our perspectives and doing things because we want to not because we are told to.

Yes, that is definitely the Tequila talking not the childhood Capri Sun. Since I have grown a little hair on my chest, of course, my perspective of the world has changed and holidays like Christmas are just not the same.

The sound of Christmas music kind of makes me want to puke and the endless decorations wasting energy does not excite me. However, do not let me yuck your yum because I most certainly will, it's the Capricorn in me (Laughs). Speaking of Capricorn energy, my birthday is on the 29th and I have no idea what I'm doing!

Holidays and birthdays are a little too similar to deadlines for my taste. I feel pressured to spend money and pressured to "do it big." Like it is literally Christmas Eve and I have not purchased one gift! This month has been one of the worst this year. I have hit a breaking point and I am really ready for a complete change. Therefore, no matter how jolly this part of the year is, people are dealing with true issues and true transformations. Those two factors tend to get in the way of traditions and the status quo.

Change does not care about conformity and transformations are not comfortable so, therefore, there is no room for tradition. So I do apologize if I am ruining your holiday. However, I wouldn't be true to you or myself if I pretended like Christmas means the same to me as it did when I was a child. So much has happened since then.

Yes, this is getting deep, but it is reality. Therefore, be sure you are checking in with people to ensure they are well. Gifts are great, but this year let's give the gift of compassion and depth. Let's stop parading on the surface and go deeper to experience true change.

Every year there is a shift. However, this year is much different. Are you ready for change? Or will you stay conformed?

Either way, make sure you have a safe Happy Christmas and a Merry New Year!