Fatherhood

Fatherhood?  Part of me is just laughing at the very idea of me writing anything about Fatherhood.  I mean, what do I even know about Fatherhood? About having a Father? About being a Father? Next to nothing!

But I'll tell you what I DO know.... Fatherhood is not just an automatic Title. It's not a guaranteed delivery with the birth of a child.  And it's not something every man deserves to be called.  It's so much more. And yet, at the same time, anyone can be a Father just by being the right person at the right time.

Now don't get me wrong.  This isn't Fatherhood hate mail.  I Loved my father with all my heart.  Sure he had his flaws... (Alcoholism, Drug Addiction, and being a Gourmet Italian Chef who, left to his own devices, would rather make Fried SPAM Sandwiches every day of the week, and twice on Sundays!)  But his worst flaw... His worst flaw by far was that he was gone too soon and left a scared, lonely, and Angry child behind.

My teen years were spent in and out of Juvenile Detention. When I wasn't behind bars I was staying at home when I could manage it, on friends' couches when I could find them, and underneath the stairs of the local Community Center when I couldn't.

High School was a significantly low time in my life, and I barely dragged my way to graduation. Excellent grades in anything that could actually manage to hold my interest and pass/fails in most anything else.  If it weren't for a few key faculty who took extra time out of their busy lives, an AMAZING amount of extra time, let's be honest, to care for me, (Ms. B, Mr. F, Mr. L, Seemingly almost weekly 'Tea Time' with Principal Y), I never would have made it out of the trenches.

What does any of that rambling have to do with Fatherhood?  Well, I'm so glad I have decided that you asked!  ;)  

Then, Senior Year of High School, the day finally came. The day that I broke. The day I gave up. The day that I realized I was in over my head and had no way out.  The day I finally did what I hadn't done in years... I told the truth. I told the truth to my School Counselor, and asked for help.

The Counselor and I talked for hours and she made some calls to local Foster homes, care centers, and facilities, and the most amazing thing happened.  For nothing in return. For no other reason than the kindness of his own heart and a desire to do the right thing, a man, (A man, mind you, who was just helping out and answering the phone for a colleague!), stepped up and offered me a place in his home as he had done, and continued to do, for so many others.

In that one moment, for the rest of that year, and for many years afterwards when I returned from College to help him to run his Foster Home in any way I could, that one man showed me what Fatherhood was all about.

Without the Extra-Ordinary efforts of that one man, who proved to me that one person in the right place at the right time can make all the difference, I do not know if I would even be alive today.

Mr B...  I owe the world, the life, and the family that I have around me now, to the fact that you stood up and made a difference instead of making a Post It note.  You, as much or more than any other single person in my life, are who taught me to be the man I am.  And I will never forget it!