Family Isn’t Always Who You’re Born To

I want to take a moment to speak from the heart; not just as an artist, but as a human being who is still learning and unlearning every day. My song “Family Ain’t Blood” has been resonating deeply with so many of you, and I’m grateful for every message, every story, and every moment you have shared about how it connects with your life.

We grow up being told that “family is everything”, usually meaning the people we share DNA with. But life teaches us differently. Sometimes, the ones who should be there for you are the first to disappear when things get hard. They say they love you, but their actions don’t match. Meanwhile, someone outside your bloodline might be the one who stands with you in the darkest hour, riding with you through the fire.

That’s the heartbeat of “Family Ain’t Blood.” Real family isn’t always biological. It’s the people who show up when you’re broken. The ones who see you at your lowest and still choose you. They don’t manipulate, abandon, or use you when the pressure hits. They lift you up. They keep you grounded. They believe in you, sometimes more than you believe in yourself.

“Family ain’t blood, it’s deeper than that,

It’s the ones who stand by your side when you are under attack.”

Those lines set the tone for everything. The song isn’t just lyrics; it’s a lived truth. DNA might make you related, but loyalty, love, and real support make you family. We don’t get to choose who we are born to, but we do get to choose who we let into our lives, and who we keep out.

Now, I want to be clear: this song isn’t a personal attack on my own family. Many of my relatives are loving, supportive, and loyal, and I’m grateful for that. This track is bigger than me; it’s for anyone who has ever felt like “family” didn’t match their reality. It’s for those who had to build a support system from scratch, or walk away from toxic spaces, even when they shared a last name with those causing the pain.

The line that sparked it all was simple but deep: “Blood makes you related. Loyalty makes you family.” That quote hit me hard. It made me ask: who do we truly call family? Is it just the people we were born into? Or the ones who show up in the silence, in the struggle, in the storm?

But here’s what I also want you to hear: this song isn’t about blind loyalty. It’s not about enabling bad behavior or standing by someone who’s toxic or destructive. That’s not loyalty; that’s codependency. Real family doesn’t just say, “I got you no matter what.” Real family holds you accountable. They will call you out when you are slipping, not to control you, but because they love you enough to be honest. Loyalty means nothing without truth and respect.

Another hard lesson I have learned: you can’t save everyone. As much as we want to be there for people at their lowest, sometimes they don’t want to be helped, or helping them means drowning yourself. And sometimes, the most loyal thing you can do is let go. Love isn’t always holding on. Sometimes it’s stepping back, letting them walk their own path. That doesn’t make you disloyal, it makes you human.

This story is layered with emotion, contradictions, and raw honesty, because that’s what life is. Family can hurt you. Strangers can save you. Loyalty can build you or break you, depending on how it’s lived out.

At the end of the day, “Family Ain’t Blood” is about questions we all wrestle with: Who do we trust? Who do we lean on? Who do we allow to shape us? And it’s okay if your answers change over time; mine have. I’m still learning. Still writing. Still growing.

To those who have built family from the ground up; I see you. To those still figuring it out; I’m with you. And to those who have stood beside me, blood or not; I love you.

Thanks for listening.