Covid and It's Aftermath As A Student

"It never occurred to me that there are things that I can't do'. Whoopi Goldberg

This is just a short version of how long I've wanted this. It actually started when someone told me that I was not clever enough. I then blurted out that when my kids are finished with their schooling, I will start my studies.

In 2010, I decided to enroll at a well-established college and was accepted after going through a few tests. I got the call a few days after a month from the campus manager about my payments. I paid my registration fees but not the full tuition and explained my situation. She understood and told me to sort everything before the end of the year.

I didn't know how I was going to do that seeing that I was unemployed and going through a divorce. Thankfully,, I got a job that same month and was ecstatic, and I started working on my 40th birthday. So, no celebration for me, but at least my two kids made it special. They were both still in school, and that was also their last year.

In December that same year, I did a lot of shoots and was working two jobs. Monday to Friday, weekend jobs, and then, of course, my night shoots as a background extra, and still it wasn't enough. So in the end, I still could not go.

In 2019, I officially started but had lots of problems with registration, but everything was sorted, and I finally started my studies. I informed them that I have a learning disability and would need lots of extra assistance. So, for my first year, I basically had to attend extra classes but was very happy for all their assistance and did well.

Then, we got the news in March 2020 that lockdown would start officially from the 27th of March. At first I didn't panic and was somewhat delighted for a little bit of a break to catch up and hopefully earn some money while at home as well as sort out a few things, which I managed in time.

The first month passed, then the second and third. By this I was frustrated, not just because it took so long, but we started receiving work from our lecturers via our phones, and I just had a tiny phone, and it was overloaded, and my storage was full. So, naturally, I started panicking again, plus my anxiety hit the roof. I'm claustrophobic as well, and staying at home drove me insane. Just the mere fact that I can't go for a long walk was driving me mad, not to mention the masks.

During the first few months, I went to visit some family members that lived close by as well as an old high school friend of mine. She didn't change that much, but her mom passed before Covid. I also got to see an old friend of my late aunt, and that was comforting because he is a pastor who encouraged all of us.

I met another lady, and we became friends, and she taught me a new skill, which I appreciated, and I earned some money when we finally returned to somewhat normalcy. I also went back to my part-time job, and that kept me sane. As long as I didn't have to do much talking, I was fine.

My speech got so bad that I started stuttering again. I didn't even want to talk to anyone. Anyway, we went back close to the end of June. To be honest, I can't even remember the date. Going back irritated me, but as they say, life must go on.

Fast forward to 2021

I forgot to mention that I stayed at the student residence for the last two years of my studies. Just picture a 50-year-old living with a bunch of hormonal students. At first they were friendly but somehow found out that I'm not their age and, to top it off, a grandmother.

It was supposed to be my final year of my studies, and I was looking forward to finishing because I also got a business opportunity that would have started in 2022.

You know, its nice to make plans; however, I wasn't prepared for what happened next. Two days before my youngest grandson's and my birthday, late in the evening, I finally switched my phone on. I forgot it was on charge. The amount of missed calls and messages that came through was unbelievable.

I immediately phoned my daughter, and she gave me the kind of news that no parent prepares for. My son, his four-year-old daughter, and his mother-in-law died in a horrible car accident that was caused by a drunken driver.

Six people were in that car, and only three survived that day, and it happened in broad daylight. They stuck along a very dangerous road. His wife and six-month-old daughter were in the backseat, and her brother was with my son.

The events that took place afterwards were horrific, and I couldn't get my head around it, but according to my family members, I was strong. If only they knew, no mother is strong after losing a child or any family member for that matter.

Even when you have a sick loved one that is suffering from a disease, no amount of time before that can prepare you for that moment. I wouldn't even wish bad on my enemies for suffering like that.

To top it off, who can celebrate a birthday after that? Plus, my final exams started three days after that. I was in no condition to study, but I wrote at least five of my subjects and did the other one in 2022. How do you cope and move on after something like that?

As difficult as it was, we had to move on. Burying three people in one day wasn't easy, but we had to. I personally have not even spoken about my emotions as a mother to anyone.

I took on a live-in job in 2022 taking care of a patient, and that family was also going through losses of their own. Losing three family members months apart and, to top that off, their tenant committed suicide the first week I moved in, but after nine months I could no longer handle it anymore.

In 2024 I made so many bad decisions and neglected myself in such a bad way that I almost had a nervous breakdown, but thankfully my daughter introduced me to the online world of writing. I'm learning a lot, but slowly, and apparently I have brain fog, according to her, but I went to visit a family member in the farm area, which helped a lot, and I got better.

Did lots of crying and went horse riding for the first time, explored the nearby towns, and literally went as close to the turbines as I possibly could just to take pictures as proof. I even had the experience of walking past snakes (small ones) that were still poisonous and was also mistaken for someone else, which was cleared up. So I had some fun times and will definitely go back to experience the baboons robbing people of their groceries.

I came back more positive and stated my healing process. It will take time, but I'm getting there at my own pace. Last year ended on a good note, and the new year also started positively, so I'm looking forward to learning new skills and healing along the way.

Thank you for this opportunity.