Chasing Dreams vs. Family Sacrifices

Lola zipped up her dress and stood in front of the mirror, her fingers shaking. It was the first movie she starred in and had its premiere today. She had imagined herself in this situation since she was a young child, acting out plays in her parents' living room. However, as she stared at her mirror, a hollow sorrow settled in her heart and her chest clenched.

She snapped out of her reverie when her phone buzzed on the dresser. A picture of her son, Danny, flickered over the display. Her mother had texted her: "Danny misses you." "Will you be back before his birthday next week?" he enquired.

Lola's throat constricting. In a few days, Danny would have been six, but she hadn't visited her family in almost a month. The rigours of film promotion, including meetings, interviews, and now the premiere, had kept her in the city and away from her husband James and son. She made a daily commitment to herself that she would find time to visit, but every day seemed to bring with it more work, more chances, and more excuses not to go.

She responded back, her hands trembling, "Tell Danny I love him." I will make every effort to attend."

The guilt swept over her like a wave as soon as she clicked send. She had made that vow before, and in her heart of hearts, she worried it wouldn't be the last. She looked at the time, realising she had two hours left before she had to head to the premiere. It took her two hours to decide whether or not she could gather herself and put on the countenance of a confident, accomplished actor.

She was astonished to hear a knock at her door. James stood there, a mix of despair and tiredness in his eyes. In an attempt to spend time with her before the premiere, he had flown in. But Lola understood there was more to this visit than the movie. It was all about them.

We need to talk," he said softly as he entered the room. "Lola."

She knew what was coming, but yet nodded. This was a conversation they'd had countless times before. Their family came second and her job came first every time, and that was how it always ended.

She tried to break up the potential argument by saying hastily, "I know things have been hard, but this is all I've worked for, James. You are aware of that.

"I do," he said as perched on the bed's edge. With his palms on his knees and his fingers tapping in time, he had developed a nervous habit during the last six months. "How about us, though? Danny, what about him? Lola, he doesn't only need me. He is dependent on his mother."

His comments struck her like a kick to the gut, harder than she had anticipated. She desired to justify herself and clarify that she was acting on their behalf. In order for them to live a better life and for Danny to know that his mother never gave up, she was pursuing her aspirations. However, the words stayed in her throat because, deep down, she wasn't sure if she was doing this for them or just for herself.

"You believe I'm not missing him? You believe I'm not missing you?" With tears welling up in her eyes, Lola's voice broke. "James, I'm handling this for us. For the future we have."

James gave her a painful look as he glanced at her. But Lola, at what cost? Everything is missing from you, including his bedtime stories and football matches, as well as his school plays. Some evenings he asks himself why you're not there while he cries himself to sleep. I'm at a loss for what to tell him now.

Now the guilt was too much to bear. With silent sobs raging through her body, she collapsed onto the bed next to him, covering her face with her hands. She hadn't realised how much she was losing since she had been so preoccupied with achieving the success she had long desired and establishing herself in a field that demanded everything of her.

Although James put his arm around her, they were now separated in a way that hadn't been before. "Lola, I know how much this means to you. And I do want you to be successful. However, I'm afraid. I fear that when you achieve your goals, there won't be any of us left."

Her face was smeared with tears, mirroring the agony in his gaze as she raised hers to his. James, I have no idea how to strike a balance. I have no idea how to balance being a mother and an actress."

He muttered, "Maybe it's not about balance." "Maybe it’s about making a choice."

The lingering sound of his words hung between them. An option. She was afraid of the concept. Her identity and passion was acting. However, Danny was her soul and James her heart. Really, could she decide between the two? Was it not possible to have both?

James stood with a fatigued stance, running a hand through his hair, clearly showing the strain of their conversation. Lola, you have my undying love. But this cannot continue. Danny is in need of you. You are necessary to me. I won't stop you if you want to continue pursuing your dreams. But I can't stand to see you stray from us any longer."

It felt like Lola's world was falling apart when she felt the floor beneath her. She had battled so hard to reach this point, but now she had to accept that her work was taking her further and further away from the people she cared about.

James gently kissed her forehead. "I'm spending the night with Danny. When you're ready to discuss, give me a call."

Lola was left alone with her thoughts as he abruptly departed the room. The situation's weight was bearing down on her chest as she sat there, gazing at the door. It seemed like just a few hours had passed, and before long, she had to depart for the premiere. But her legs felt heavy as she got to her feet. her heart became very heavy. She took one last look at her phone and scrolled through the pictures James had sent her of Danny during the previous few weeks. Danny waving his arms and waiting for her to get home, Danny laughing at the park, Danny proudly showing off a drawing he'd done.

The glitter and grandeur of the premiere seemed so distant suddenly. The affection from her family was greater than the admiring spectators and the bright lights. That was when it dawned on her that no position, no accolade, or degree of celebrity could ever make up for the loss of the most significant moments in her life.

Grabbing her phone, Lola called James. She inhaled deeply and spoke tremblingly when he replied. "I’m coming home."

Her career did not cease as a result. However, it marked the start of a new chapter in her life—one in which she would eventually discover that pursuing her aspirations didn't have to mean sacrificing everything else she treasured.