1: The Diagonal Line

There I was, sitting in an unknown room, noticeably the only brunette. Every other human seated in the room was adorned with deep reddish copper and strawberry locks. Their exuberant exchanges felt new and exciting and the occasional thickness of the air led me to think this was a significant gathering of some sort. I looked across the space, feeling its warmth, toward the couch where a few were sitting. Behind them was this diagonal line spanning beyond the length of the counch. From my point of view, I couldn't quite make out what it was.

All of the sudden, there was this inner knowing. They are all family, clearly because of the shared ginger skin and hair, but more specifically - it's a mother, father, sister and brother - all sitting in a living room.

It was that moment I began to realize I'm not really here, but damn!, it sure feels real. I was laughing and engaging with the group, they felt like family. In fact, so c0mfortable that I didn't want to leave...however, I noticed marked uneasiness set in. Oddly, it felt like I was being watched.

I opened my eyes.

I believe it was around 7:30 in the morning of February 25, 2007. It was a Sunday because the reason I felt I needed to open my eyes was because Curtis was staring at me while I slept. Normally, he would have already been at work. Hence, the feeling of uneasiness causing me to wake from an incredibly real-feeling dream. Fortunately, I had a witness and I shared with him what I was dreaming about just before opening my eyes.

"I just dreamt that you have a mother, father, sister and brother and they all have red hair." That's all I said, with wide blurry eyes. Having found out when he was six years old that he was adopted when he was 16 days old, Curtis has openly discussed his feelings his entire life. This particular dream, however, invoked tears for the first time as an adult.

Two years prior, we had discussed the possibility of finding his biological mother to inquire about health history. Our daughter, Nyah, was born in 2003 and we felt it was important to have genetic information if we could. Curtis' parents have always supported his decisions around finding his birth parents. Until now he hadn't really pursued it. Oh, did I mention that I was having that dream on the morning of his birthday? Yea.

Needless to say, Curtis and I had some intimate conversations that led to him taking action steps to locate a mystery woman whom he had minimal information about, AND it was a closed adoption. It continues to fascinate me how, when energies/effort/intentions align, miracles happen. As the caring and respectful man that he is, Curtis chose to first sit down and discuss his plan with his parents. They, of course, supported him. His mom attended a local support group for adoptive children and parents.

By the end of July, that's only like four months later, he was on the phone with not only his birth mother, but also his birth father.

I remember the day they reconnected very vividly. Curtis, by means of logic and mystic, had managed to locate the name of a woman who wasn't pictured in the Evangel college alumni yearbook the year he was born, 1974, even though she was mentioned as having attended that year. You see, all the information he had about his parents was one was musically talented and the other was athletic; they were both religiously affiliated with Assembly of God and in college. There is so much more to this part of the story, but I'll save that for another day.

He had left a voicemail for her, explaining who he was looking for since he was asking for her maiden name. He didn't get into much on the recording, but left his name and phone number and then waited. I remember going to yoga class that evening and not being able to relax because of the excitement knowing that by the time I got out of class, he could have heard back from her. So, the moment savasana was over, I was up and out the door, checking my voicemail and immediately calling him back. This was back when we had landlines and call waiting! He answered. I asked. He excitedly exclaimed: "I'm talking to my mother AND FATHER on the other line!"

Heart pounding and bridling excitement as I drove, I quickly made a few phone calls on the way home to fill in some of our friends who had also been on the edge of their seats. Turns out, his mother and father ended up marrying six months after giving him up for adoption. They went on to have two more children, whom had no idea about Curtis until the night he called. They always hoped for the day their oldest would walk down the sidewalk and knock on their front door.

That day finally arrived within the month when we made the trip to Rowlett, Texas, just outside of Dallas. Interestingly enough, we did actually video record the moments leading up to him meeting them for the first time - the drive around the neighborhood, parking and emotionally preparing - but, somehow it got recorded over. Nothing can replace or could have actually captured the feelings and relationship set in motion that day.

As the door opened, his father welcomed him in with a giant hug and tears to match. More family were waiting their turn to shower him with love, looking him over from head to know. Noticing the similarities and mannerisms that reflect themselves. Touching shoulders and arms, inspecting fingers and toes, comparing skin tones.

We sat in the living room getting acquainted. As I sat back and observed the wild nuances of nature vs. nurture, I noticed.....the diagonal line behind the couch. It was the staircase to the second floor.

It wasn't a dream. It was a premonition.

And, he found out he was actually born on the 19th, not the 25th. So, we now we celebrate Curtis for a whole week every year. And, he had the opportunity to meet both grandfathers before they left this earth. One of them, a WWII veteran, photographed above.

In the photo: (left to right) Clinton and Beverly Claybaker, Curtis Claybaker, Melvin Brandenburg, Cindi and Bruce Brandenburg.