How To Know If My Feelings Are Real Or Just Fear

last night I was almost dead. I felt like I would collapse if he didn't text me. Then it occurred to me, is this feeling I'm experiencing love, or just the fear that he'll leave me? This question is eating me up inside. Sometimes his smile feels like I have the whole world in my hands... and his silence makes me fall as if I've fallen into a deep abyss.

If this were love, why would it hurt so much? Love should be comforting. A feeling of home. But I'm always dependent on his mood. If he speaks, I'm alive; if he's silent, I'm empty. Is this love? Or is it just a game of fear?

I remember one day, I was sitting on my balcony, watching the rain. It was pouring down, but the fear within me was no less than a storm. I asked myself, "Do I really love this man, or am I just afraid of the moment he'll leave me?" And honestly, I burst into tears upon hearing the answer.

It is easy to write the difference between love and fear on paper, but when you are living in that relationship, both together drive you crazy.

I have felt that fear inside me many times.

When he doesn't pick up the phone late at night, my chest starts to tighten.

When he casually says, "I'm busy," I start blaming myself maybe I asked for too much, maybe I'm the burden.

And when he suddenly hugs me lovingly, I cry with relief.

This is fear's ultimate game making you accustomed to his sometimes-yes-and-sometimes-no habit. Sometimes he pulls away, sometimes he comes closer, expressing his love. And every time you think, "Everything will be fine now." But deep inside, fear grips you.

If you also feel that he moves away as soon as he comes close, then this article will give you clarity: why do men pull away after getting close

I know love doesn't force you to prove yourself every moment. Love is where you don't have to change yourself. Where you can show your silence, your anger, your fear, and still feel safe.

But fear… fear makes you think all the time. You think, “If I say this, he'll get angry.”

Your gestures also start becoming measured.

Your whole day revolves around his messages or his mood.

I remember one night I said to myself, "If I really love him, why does this feel so exhausting?" And then it dawned on me it's probably not love, it's just fear.

I am afraid that I might be left alone.

I was afraid that I might be left alone.

The fear that maybe I'm not valuable enough for someone to choose me.

And this fear creates such a big confusion that you start justifying it by calling it love.

Let me tell you something. Try asking yourself this question sometime “If I didn't have the fear of being alone, would I stay in this relationship?”

This question is very difficult. It will shock you. But the answer will reveal the truth.

My hand was shaking as I wrote this in my diary. But the truth was clear I was with him out of fear, not love.

The energies of love and fear are very different.

In love you find yourself.

You lose yourself in fear.

Love is constant.

Fear makes you go on a swing.

Love is a safe place.

Fear is the struggle to live.

Healing wasn't easy. I spent many nights crying, wondering why I kept getting caught in relationships where fear, anxiety, and insecurity consumed me.

Slowly, I took small steps.

Every time I felt nervous, I asked myself “Is this happiness or fear?”

I started writing a diary, noting when my heart was calm and when it was restless.

I consulted a psychiatrist and understood that my habit draws me towards partners who are not emotionally available.

If you also feel that your partner ignores your feelings, reading this will help.: how to heal when your partner ignores your feelings

And the biggest step I started loving myself.

Even today, sometimes there's confusion. But now I have a simple rule if I feel peace in the relationship, it's love. If I'm only living in worry, it's fear.

Perhaps you're asking yourself the same thing as you read this. Perhaps your heart is also repeatedly asking this question how do I know if my feelings are real or just fear?

So I will just say this listen to your heart.

Is she calm, composed, or running in fear all the time?

The truth is hidden there.

If you want to take your relationship in a healthy direction and understand yourself, this guide is for you: what men want in a relationship

Love should be like home.

Where you can breathe freely.

Where you don't have to prove yourself.

If it doesn't feel like home, it's probably not love.

Maybe it's just fear, and you deserve more than that.

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