Creating Momentum Through Action

I had a phone call with a dear friend this week that left me in a state of deep contemplation. It was an overdue catch-up that happens less frequently than we would both like. So when it finally does occur, we’re greeted with big sloppy smiles plastered across the screen as high-pitched squeals escape our mouths and a surge of joy expands our hearts.

It’s what I imagine caffeinated toddlers would look and sound like.

The beginning of our catch-up session covered the basics—what we’ve been moving through and moving towards, the mostly comical ways the universe has been testing us (if you can’t laugh, what’s the point?), and how we plan on navigating these tests with as much grace as we can muster.

As my friend was diving into all the micro and macro shifts that had unfolded since we last spoke a few weeks before, I realized most of these positive developments traced back to one simple thing…

Action.

She took action, created momentum, and the universe started to respond.

I’ve seen it time and time again in my own life, the direct correlation between taking intentional, aligned action and having my reality shift in the direction I desire.

The thing is, I’m notorious for implementing all the personal growth tools that keep me safe and cosy in my bed (for context I’m a Tauruen projector, it’s where I belong most of the time). This usually looks like scribbling in my journal until my hand becomes numb, hypnosis until I’m in a perma-theta state, and pulling Tarot until the cards give me an eye-roll. These tools are powerful and incredibly helpful, especially the modalities that address subconscious programs (more on this in a future essay), but they can only get you so far. They are an essential piece of the puzzle, but they don’t complete it.

You need action.

For most of my life, I’ve brushed up against such severe resistance around taking action. It’s always felt like I was fighting against and coercing the strongest parts of myself to simply do things. Sometimes they’d be menial and thoughtless tasks like taking a walk around the block, and sometimes they’d carry weight like completing a creative project. I became a master procrastinator and avoided confronting tasks head-on, often finding solace in delaying decisions or actions that required me to step outside my comfort zone. This pattern of avoidance became a very familiar song and dance for as long as I can remember, building up a reservoir of emotions that resembled guilt and shame. It was shielding me from the discomfort and uncertainty that accompanies taking action and making me feel like I couldn’t trust myself to follow through with what I knew my soul desired. I yearned for so much more in my life, yet I couldn’t get out of my own way.

This stagnancy tasted like self-abandonment, but I had no idea how to move past my inability to move.

Over the years I heard people speak about the nervous system, but it wasn’t until a month ago that I truly understood what it was. The nervous system is our body's command centre, orchestrating everything from our thoughts to our reactions and movements, or in my case, non-movements. This deeper understanding revealed that my avoidance and resistance to taking action was because I’d been in a perpetual state of freeze. Freeze is one of four survival mechanisms that our bodies instinctively activate in response to perceived danger or stress, crucial components of our nervous system's response toolkit. Alongside fight, flight, and fawn, freeze serves as yet another protective mechanism, temporarily immobilizing us when we perceive a threat that we believe we cannot overcome through other means. A freeze response puts you in a state of hypoarousal, which essentially means you completely shut down.

Somewhere along my journey, most likely in my childhood, I innocently picked up the program that taking action and stepping outside my comfort zone was incredibly unsafe. My nervous system was activated and instead of learning how to regulate during these times of unsafety, my freeze response was triggered and I would dissociate. And because I never learned how to regulate, I continue to revert to this freeze response as an adult whenever I encounter a similar situation that first activated this protective mechanism.

In the least dramatic way possible, understanding this process has completely changed my life.

It has helped me make sense of why action often felt so daunting and why I gravitate toward things that allow me to remain nestled safe and sound in the comfort of my own home. It all comes back to safety and protection, similar to the fear I spoke about last week. Once I recognized all of this, literally five weeks ago, I allowed myself to approach my resistance around ‘doing’ with a deep sense of compassion and patience. Instead of berating myself for not taking action, I began to gently explore what was triggering my freeze response and how I could gradually thaw it.

With this newfound awareness around my freeze response, I’ve started to gather knowledge on how to regulate when in this state.

Enter my daily regulation walks.

The most helpful tool I’ve been utilizing is the simple act of going on a daily walk. When I begin to feel an ounce of resistance or a strong urge to procrastinate I throw on a pair of leggings, lace up my Hoka’s, and hit the pavement.

I don’t entertain any thoughts on why I shouldn’t, I just do it.

Don’t get me wrong, some days are tough. Especially when I’m knee-deep in my luteal phase and all I want to do is lie face down on the carpet and let the weight of my body melt into the floorboards. But I never, ever regret taking a walk. Ever. So I remind myself of this and peel myself off the ground, put the damn shoes on my feet, and go. Even if it’s just 0.5 laps around my neighbourhood.

Walking creates an alternative path that soothes my nervous system and takes me out of the freeze response. I’m able to come back from my walks refreshed and ready to get shit done without it feeling like such a battle. The first few times I did it I couldn’t comprehend how painless it was to finish something that would normally leave me doom scrolling for three hours. This feedback makes lacing up the next day that much easier.

Let me tell you, taking action has never felt so liberating.

Walking is what works for me, your resource kit to regulate may look and feel different. Other effective tools include deep breathing exercises, humming or chanting, cold exposure, meditation, progressive muscle techniques, spending time in nature, and yoga. Experimenting with different techniques allows you to discover what resonates best with your needs and preferences. The key is to find practices you will commit to consistently to help you reconnect with yourself and empower you to move forward with clarity and purpose.

And then the real magic starts to transpire.

For me, this looks like having the creative energy to express myself again and share my writing on this platform. It looks like expanding my reality and welcoming new opportunities and relationships into my life after months of being at a standstill. It looks like magical and kismet moments presenting themselves in the most mundane circumstances. It looks like unaligned pathways correcting themselves, and a sense of purpose and fulfillment guiding each step forward.

For my friend, the magic looked just as enchanting with doors of opportunity swinging open, serendipitous encounters illuminating new paths, and a deep sense of contentment settling in as the universe began to follow her lead.

As my journey continues to unravel, I carry with me a newfound appreciation for the power of action intertwined with the wisdom of regulating my nervous system. Each step forward, whether small or significant, is now infused with a deep knowing that I have the power to come back home to myself and create momentum in my life as I continue to travel down the path to finding my path, wherever that may lead me.

I embrace both the moments of challenge and magic with equal gratitude while knowing I’m fully supported along the way.

Now I ask you…

What aligned action are you currently resisting?

What if you stepped through the resistance by regulating and discovered the magic awaiting you on the other side?

What would that magic look and feel like for you?