The Repercussions of Telling Big Little Lies

While I am an avid consumer of horror stories and films as my most recent publications have indicated, I also enjoy stories that aren’t considered horror, but that might have a darker edge or underlying weight to them that could be considered to be real world horror. An author I’ve only begun to read over the last two years or so is Liane Moriarty, who has become a known name in the last few years. I’ve read only four so far, they each have packed a punch not unlike the powerful prose of Jodi Picoult, while still having her own unique voice that’s really unforgettable. Where I started with her body of work is where I think many have started due to its popularity as well as the subsequent limited series with HBO. This book is Big Little Lies. Before reading this novel I had heard a great deal of buzz about it. Friends were telling me to watch the limited series. Reviews for the novel as well as the limited series were showing up online left and right. When I did finally read this book, I wasn’t prepared for what I ultimately read.

Big Little Lies is a murder mystery where from the start of the novel, you don’t know if someone was murdered, if there was an accident, you’re not even told which character has died. This latter point on its own is brilliant. A who done it story with a different twist that I personally haven’t seen in other books I have read with a similar premise. The story jumps back and forth from the past to the present, where the events of a trivia night for a local school is being investigated. Much of the story depicting the present portion of the story is told through police interviews, which gives an interesting look at the events leading up to the trivia night in question. What this does is create a level of uncertainty where you don’t know who’s lying, and when you know someone is lying you’re either left wondering why, or being angry because you know why but you can’t understand why they would lie at all. This book also discusses bullying, intimate partner violence, as well as sexual assault, and Moriarty displays these events with great care while not sugarcoated the brutal and malignant repercussions that come with these acts of violence wrapped within different wrapping paper. Moriarty writes about the truth of generational violence, how words spread like wildfire within small communities or even small groups of acquaintances, and how ultimately lies are spread. There’s really no other story like, which is why I think through both the printed page and our TV screens, everyone feels the authenticity of the story, its characters, and the devastating impact of trauma.

For me, reading this book was an experience that will hold a large place in my heart for multiple reasons. At the time of reading this novel, I was being held captive within the depths of a growing addiction to klonopin, my relationship of five years at the time, which had been some ways a lot like a marriage, was coming to an end even if I was in a state of denial about it, and I was just beginning to take the treatment of my Substance Abuse Disorder more seriously than I had before in the years proceeding. It was actually while in residential treatment that I finished reading the book. Between the intense emotions I was processing during my time in treatment and the powerful conclusion of this book, I was left reeling in more ways than one. Both things forced me to look at myself in a new light in order to save myself from the grips of my addictions. Of course, this would only be the beginning of that intense and honestly traumatic experience during my six months or so in treatment, but this was definitely the first chapter that would lead to a crescendo that mirrored in many aspects some of the events of the book. There only difference is that the deaths that are within this chapter of my life are ultimately the result of addiction and everything it steals from people.

For anyone who has experienced trauma that has crippled them, this book is one I would highly recommend. It’s an intense read and can be triggering for many, but it is a book that I think is healing, is cathartic, and a much needed intimate reading experience that I know I seek when reading a book. As a side note, while I haven’t seen the limited series by HBO, I have seen many reviews that not only does it stand on its own, but it also carries the soul of the book with amazing accuracy. If I decide to finally watch the series, I’ll share my thoughts about it here. For now though, as I process my own recent traumatic events in my life, I’m fine with just having the memory of the book. Sometimes one can only take so much of looking at themselves in the mirror that a book like Big Little Lies holds up to you, and forces you to take a good long look at yourself.