The Underwear Thief: When a Kink Crosses the Line

For those of you who don’t know, I get men off for a living — and they tell me all of their deep, dark secrets.

Working on a phone sex line might not sound glamorous to most people, but let me tell you, I’ve heard stories that could fill a dozen confessionals. Kinks, fantasies, roleplay, guilt, vulnerability — when you talk to someone in the dark, from the privacy of your own space, it’s amazing what comes out.

Don’t believe me? Check out my Aliens story. That one still makes me laugh.

But the story I’m about to share didn’t make me laugh.

“I Just Really Love Women’s Underwear.”

It was a standard shift when I got a call from a cheerful man in his forties. He sounded relaxed, open, and friendly — the kind of caller I usually enjoy speaking with. He told me upfront that he had a fetish.

Now, I’ve been doing this long enough to know that the word “fetish” covers a lot of ground. Some people are into feet. Others like roleplay involving control or taboo scenarios. I’ve spoken to men who get off on sneezing, on latex, on vacuum sealing. You name it — I’ve probably heard it.

So, I asked him to tell me more.

He explained that he had a large collection of women’s underwear — bras, panties, stockings, slips — and that he liked to wear them under his clothes while going about his day. This didn’t shock me in the slightest. I’ve spoken to plenty of men who find comfort, pleasure, or a sense of identity in wearing lingerie. Honestly? I think more men should embrace softness and sensuality if it makes them feel good.

But then he took the story further.

Painting Houses in Silk

He said he worked as a painter and decorator. When his clients weren’t home — usually women — he would strip down to his silk bra and panties and paint in their houses like that.

At first, I thought, Well, that’s private enough. Weird, maybe, but no harm done if no one’s the wiser.

But then he told me what he really did when no one was looking.

If he found the woman attractive, he would go into her bedroom and rifle through her underwear drawers. He’d examine her lingerie, feel the fabric, look at the tags. And if something appealed to him? He’d try it on. Right there, in her bedroom. And sometimes — he admitted this with a laugh — he’d take a piece or two home for himself.

I went silent for a moment. He must have thought I was intrigued. But in reality, I was stunned.

Between Kink and Crime

Let me make one thing very clear: I do not judge people for what they’re into.

Men wearing lingerie? Great. Exploring kinks and fetishes? Go for it. Expressing your sexuality in safe, consensual ways? Absolutely.

But what he described wasn’t consensual. It wasn’t part of a fantasy between partners. It was an invasion of privacy. It was theft.

I’m not talking about the moral gray areas of sexuality — I’m talking about real-world consequences. Someone trusting a tradesman to work in their home while they’re out, only to have him go through their most intimate belongings, wear them, and steal them?

It’s a violation of trust. A violation of autonomy. A violation of consent.

And yes — it's criminal behavior.

The Problem with Fetish Normalization

We live in a time when more people than ever are exploring their sexuality and expressing it publicly. That’s a good thing, in my opinion. The more we normalize sex, kinks, and alternative lifestyles, the less shame people carry — and the more honest conversations we can have.

But there’s a dark side to this normalization when it’s misunderstood.

A kink is not a free pass.

Sexual desire does not trump consent.

Being aroused by something doesn’t justify acting on it without permission.

I’ve worked in the sex industry long enough to know that some people blur that line — and others never acknowledged it in the first place. This caller seemed proud of what he did. He laughed as if it were harmless. And that’s what unsettled me most.

Because somewhere out there are women who trusted him to work in their homes — and he didn’t just cross their boundaries. He ignored that boundaries existed at all.

The Emotional Weight

What lingered with me long after the call wasn’t just the theft — it was imagining how those women would feel if they knew.

As a woman, I know how intimate it feels to buy lingerie for yourself. It’s not just fabric — it’s confidence, it’s identity, it’s a kind of sacred self-love. The idea that someone could come into my space, touch something that personal, wear it, and steal it?

I would feel violated. Angry. Unsafe in my own home.

I’m used to hearing secrets. I hear things people have never told their partners, their therapists, their friends. But this one stuck with me. Not because it was strange — but because it was so wrong, and the man telling it didn’t even seem to know that.

A Final Thought

I’m not here to kink shame. I’m not here to pass judgment on what turns people on — as long as everyone involved has given enthusiastic, informed consent.

But if your kink involves violating someone's boundaries, stealing from them, or using their private belongings without permission, then it's not just a fetish. It’s abuse of trust. It’s theft. It’s a violation.

And I don’t care how silky the panties are — no one consents to being stolen from.

Have you ever had a moment where someone’s “confession” crossed the line? Let me know in the comments. And if this story struck a chord with you, feel free to leave a tip — it helps support more raw, real writing like this.