Perfect Piece

She sits at the round kitchen table, thumbing through an old cookbook. She is looking for the perfect recipe to make for their second-year marriage anniversary. She wants it to be a surprise, but she knows he will be expecting something. Not like she could give him much if she wanted to. Her budget is not huge, but she has been saving.

AH! There, page 57, is triple chocolate cake. He loves chocolate. It is perfect. He will never notice a thing and a huge plus, she has all the ingredients on hand. She spent many afternoons with the family readiness group, and they almost always required bake goods of some sort.

She began the process. Methodically. Nothing reached her anymore. Baking, once may have brought her joy. Now? Nothing. She read over the ingredient list, pulling out each item as she went. Reaching up to the top shelf of the cabinet, she let out a huge gasp. She had momentarily forgotten the surprise he had left for her ribs last night after his unit “function”. As her ribs cooled to a manageable simmer, she began to think of how her husband had baked her like a cake. Like he was following some recipe for the perfect submissive housewife.

Step by step he followed the cookbook.

1. Gather the ingredients. Find a woman: shy, quiet, no family, no confidence, little friends, part-time work, young, impressionable, inexperienced.

2. Set the oven. Create the perfect environment. Offer grand gesture of romance. Complement her, build her up. Let her warmup to you. Set the temperature hot.

3. Mix the ingredients. Slowly mix in some off handed insults and suggestions that make her question herself but seem supportive. Be careful to get this right. Not too hot or not too cold. Must be subtle to mold her to your desires. Start with a simple, “your hair looks nice, but you know what’s really sexy. . . (insert your preferred hair style)”. Next separate her from her support system like yolk from the whites. Slowly add in comments that make her question her friends’ motives. Add something in like, “your friends are nice, but they party too much. They are holding you back”. For the last ingredient, a ring. Tell her she will not have to work anymore. She will be taken care of now.

4. Pour the mixture into the greased pan. After you are married, tell her you are moving to another station, and she must follow because she is your wife now. She will be homeless if she does not come.

5. Bake. Now that the batter is complete, throw it in a lonely, isolated situation. One where you are her sole interaction. Control everything in the environment, so she always stays perfectly delectable and to your taste. *

*Sometimes, force must be applied to the recipe.

Listen to me she thought to herself. She knew the role she played in her baking, but this was one cake that will not be burnt. She had cooked up her freedom and she was taking it with this triple chocolate cake. He would never taste the true surprise inside. She giggled to herself while pulling out the cake to cool and ice. She felt almost giddy. A perfect way to act for a second anniversary. Bubbly rhythms of familiar show tunes left her closed lips. She was actually humming, while thoughts went to her single suitcase packed with the essentials. A passport and map of Costa Rica stuffed in the front pocket.

He would be home soon. She needed to hurry. She got the cake iced and looking beautifully scrumptious. She was not worried about him making her eat any. He never let her eat sugary delights. “A moment on the lips, forever on the hips” he would always say. She would not eat it in any case. He noticed every little pound. Fortunate that he thought this way though; he would not allow her to have any kids because of what it would do to her body. A small miracle to world.

She heard him unlock the door. She had no last-minute hesitation. He baked his cake and was about to get his perfect slice of chocolate cake.