Word of the Day: 突き当り

Oh nice, yea I don't mind.

mm.. I woke up wanting to make a skit of some sort and do some memes in town but I don't know how confident I am right now. Not only with the ability to do this, but also just my available energy. It is 7pm right now so I have plenty of time to prepare.

I do need to do my Todo list, that is true, a hundred percent, I need to catch up to today, and so the idea of going out and playing in town feels sort of counter productive but, I feel like I need to do something fun for once other wise I will like, just stuck in depression and my body will be achy forever.

Yea, I guess I am wanting to do it for endorphins. Our bodies know what they need, actually. Social conditioning starts putting us in weird loops where we do the whole Pavlov dog thing and become desperate when we can't get what we need. None of us are immune to this but, we can control how we go about that.

Sometimes that makes us seem rude, or selfish, but there is usually a reason for this. Sometimes it is hurt, sometimes it is fear.. What doesn't help is, in this day and age, none of us have the time to process this either way.

I mean, this is very different to making Pixie Road.. but I am sort of happy that I am doing something more creative again. School felt too stifiling, also no one wanted to do something collaborative. I am trying still because I haven't given up complete hope, even though most people are saying it is too dangerous, out of pocket, and all those other things.

Hmm... I just want to do a quick energy check in right now. I am not hurting at all. I slept all day and some how it cured my pain. I am really baffled by that effect, because it was pretty bad earlier today.

I do have tylenol and stuff still, but I don't want to take it if I don't need it. I am not planning on pushing my body too hard right now. I need to organize my thoughts and get homework down on Canvas.

Yea the Peruvian tried to talk to me again, but I only deal with language exchanges in person through Superprof.

I mean, I might slide for Hellotalk, but that is about it. Past that, it feels like, it is less professional.

Yea, I am starting to think of a lot of people, but I don't need to be burdened by the past at this point in time. I was going to use it as fuel for something, but it might be more emotionally taxing than I need right now.

All projects aside, I need to keep to my Todo list. It is like my golden rule so, I need to work on that shit.

Writing this story is sort of my little break for a while while I am sipping on my energy drink. Breakfast break, I guess.

The thing is sort of silly: I have to write a digital page of paper, in order to earn a page of real paper. I need real paper in order to do homework, to then upload it digitally. It is a very long process to allow for both work and homework to coincide. It helps if I have concentration on that, and I am too much of a chismosa to really be around people if I am really needing to grind.