Word of the day: 断食

I told myself that I was going to fast, or at least not spend any money on food until my snap card refills on the 9th of next month but my mom wanted a cheeseburger because she didn't want to cook and I collect stars for Carl's Jr. so, we ended up getting some hamburgers and it came out to 6 dollars a piece thanks to the stars giving us a discount.

Of course there are better offers at like Wendy's or other places like that but we live relatively close to a Carl's Jr. and their bacon western cheeseburger is pretty good. I decided to be conservative with my order by ordering a single, even though they've recently came out with a Triple Bacon Cheeseburger.... 3 patties, bruh. We live in the land of the obese for sure.

I am so happy I am having consistent lessons with my student. The extra money is making me more confident that I can save up for my apartment that I want so it is giving me some hope. It is based off of he will of god or something that I happen to get someone here wanting me to help them with English, but I am very happy for the opportunity.

Unfortunately I am needing to go to an appointment soon that, while isn't as bad as the medical one I just recently went to, it is mentally sort of kind of annoying. I don't care to talk to my prescriber but it is sort of a necessary evil going forward with everything.

While I was in the library I kept getting glimpses of signs of my first boyfriend, Kenta. Well, I mean, we first met there so, I even went down he aisle where we first met sort of reminiscing but right after that I saw so many things and then I saw he updated his Instagram.

It sucks we didn't work out but, I am fine with it overall. I guess I have to be fine with it. I don't know why it sticks with me so much... I think I miss those feelings of being so completely in love with someone or those feelings of being taken completely by someone..

I don't know if it was limerence or not, but it was real for me or as far as I knew.. I was so insecure back then. If we met again, I wonder what it would be like. He's married or not single anymore as far as I can tell so, it would have to be platonic.

I have been saying to myself lately, " I am in my highest timeline now and my moves constantly elevate me. " as a mantra of sorts to get me through this awkward time. I am happy I am no struggling anymore but I don't feel I am thriving. It's like striving rather than struggling though so that is good.

I also saw one of the girls I was jailed with got out. She was in the grocery store just happily shopping but, she kind of got a screw loose so, it surprised me quite a bit.

Anyway, I need to leave this place pretty soon to go to my appointment.. My battery sort of went out with the power cord so that sort of concerns me a bit. I hope I don't have to buy a new computer any time soon. That will take out a month's savings and I'll have to live even more frugally that I am currently.

Ok, time to go. As I say on my stream on Twitch, " Take care, be good, bye bye! "