Word of the Day: 節約

It is 7:30 am right now. I really need to buckle down and work on my Homework right now. I sort of wasted my Saturday just sort of laying about.

I think first things first, I need to make some tea. I have been drinking alcohol and weed and shit, so I need to sober up. I sort of wished I watched a movie yesterday since I was sort of just having a free day but I sort of just did my tasks I needed to half-assed instead. I really need to just take rest as seriously as working on stuff. I mean I guess I did rest with drinking alcohol and eating pot gummies but, I could've watched a movie and put on a face mask or something, you know? Really make the most of it rather than walking around feeling guilty and allowing myself the luxury of just going slow.

I figured I will write this story then get to work on the homework; I love writing here, it really sorts my mind out.

I have an odd feeling. I don't think I am resistant to what I need to do, but I feel like.... Something needs me? Like, I am supposed to be paying attention to something I am not. And I don't mean the usual stacking of tasks and sort of having the idea of a task ahead of me. I am talking about some sort of hidden task I can't really quite explain. Maybe it is the weed and alcohol. But maybe it is also my heart telling me to listen to something.

Maybe being outside of the Ether as I have been lately is making me feel sort of hollow? Maybe it is that. Maybe it isn't actually anything but, this is making me want to go back and laydown to figure it out. I don't have the time to do that anymore so I have to keep pushing forward.

I am looking at my paper pad right by my computer, all written in Japanese. It is so funny, I can actually speak another language.

Ah I guess I am resistant to it. I didn't feel called to any of my tarot readers, but there is one I value the opinion of mostly for spiritual growth. They made a video that gave me perspective. Having learned what I needed to know, I feel more wanting to connect to the Ether again. I can't afford this at the moment though. I must do my homework.

I think I'll tackle my Japanese homework first. Both my Math and Japanese homework is hard this time but, I think Japanese is a bit more manageable and if I finish that first, the math won't seem so hard without the pressure.

It is all about the decline in birthrates in Japan, and learning about the financial incentives that the government has for them. I feel like... I am so worried about missing my own period, I don't have time for this crap. But I will listen to the video and try to give my opinion/answer for the questions we are asked.

There is a video we have to watch on Youtube, and we have to watch it and answer some factual things, along with giving our opinion.

I don't even know if it has to be in Japanese but I am fine either way. The real problem is trying to find out where the video is being hosted in the labyrinth of the school's complex online establishment. I think it is that sort of thing that makes it sort of burdensome for me.

Unlike here, I just click a button then write whatever I want.