What is truth, and what is a lie?

What is Truth, and What is a Lie?

Random Thoughts of a Lonely Girl

It's night outside—a starry night, covered in dim and darkness, yet bright and beautiful. I am looking outside my window, lost in thought. How is it bright outside even in this darkness? My eyes wander around, searching for the answer, and then I look up, to the sky. Oh, I see; it’s the twinkling stars making the night glow bright and beautiful.

Why are they twinkling? Some say they are burning and will turn into nothing. Are they sad about turning into nothing? I say maybe they aren’t burning out, they are looking at us and shining brightly because we are smiling at them, they are glad that they are making an effort to make our night so beautiful. The ultimate truth is what I see and what I choose to believe—what I believe to truth. Silly me, my perception is what shapes my truth and my lies.

I truly believe it's on me to decide what truth is and what a lie is, not the one who is speaks it. If I perceive it to be a lie, then it is a lie—even if in reality it's true. Just like when he told me that he loves me, I believed it to be true, and it is true, even when his actions say otherwise. Tell me, is it really the truth? What is reality?

He says he doesn’t love me. I don’t believe this; it’s a lie for me. He is a liar, and yes, deep inside I am lying to myself. He never deceived me. He didn’t know it was me who deceived me because it was I who got it wrong. How would he know, he never looked at my eyes showing him my complete truth. Oh, he should have and by then he would know my truth and he didn’t. It's not his fault to say the words I wish to hear; it’s my fault for refusing to hear the things I did not wish to hear. Not everyone lies. People simply say what is on their minds, and we choose to hear what soothes us, what comforts us. Everyone lies, but I, who perceive a lie to be the truth even when I know it’s a lie, am yet another fool, fool mistake my own desires for truth.

A fool living in their own world, built with four walls—expectation, delusion, hope, and love.

I ask you: how do you tell when someone is telling a lie or the truth? You know it by perceiving; you don’t know the truth—you just perceive it to be the truth.

My mind is a mess. I'm craving happiness, even if it is just for a moment. I'm risking my future for that moment. Am I right? No, I'm not. I know it, and yet I still risk my future for that fleeting moment. Should I do this? No, I shouldn’t, but I can’t seem to get a hold of myself. If I don’t do this, I know nothing else to do, and I am no one to tell him to stay—to stay here with me, to stay here for me, to stay here for us.

Us. Have you gone completely mad? There is no us, and there won’t be us. What us are you talking about? Then what is this what I am feeling? There is us with me and you, in my heart, and...

Is there no us?

My thoughts drift again for me and my future. My Future? What does it hold? How is my future going to be? Looking at the present, I can tell it's not as bright as I wish. I dream of a better future, but my present self is not working hard enough to make it real.

And reality and realization hit hard