The guilt of infidelity: My confession

I never thought I would be the type of person to cheat on their partner. I always prided myself on being loyal and honest, but things changed when I met her.

Her name was Sarah, and she was unlike anyone I had ever met before. She was smart, funny, and beautiful, with a magnetic personality that drew me in. We met at a work conference and hit it off immediately, spending the entire weekend talking and laughing together.

At the time, I was in a long-term relationship with my girlfriend of four years, Emily. We had been through a lot together and had even talked about getting married someday. But after meeting Sarah, I couldn't stop thinking about her. I found myself daydreaming about her when I should have been working, and staying up late texting her instead of spending time with Emily.

It wasn't long before things escalated. Sarah and I started going on secret dates, meeting up for coffee or drinks after work. We talked about everything under the sun and shared a connection that I had never felt before. I knew that what I was doing was wrong, but I couldn't bring myself to end things with either woman.

The guilt ate away at me day and night, but I couldn't stop myself. I was addicted to the rush of seeing Sarah and the excitement of our secret romance. At the same time, I loved Emily and couldn't bear the thought of hurting her.

One night, Sarah and I were out at a bar when Emily called me. I panicked and silenced my phone, not wanting to risk her finding out about my affair. When I got home, Emily was waiting for me, tears streaming down her face. She had found out about Sarah and me and was devastated.

I was speechless, unable to explain myself or justify my actions. I had never seen Emily so hurt and betrayed, and I knew that I had destroyed any chance we had of salvaging our relationship.

Over the next few days, I tried to talk to Emily and apologize, but she refused to speak to me. I felt like a monster, consumed by guilt and regret. I knew that I had made a huge mistake and that I had hurt someone I cared about deeply.

Finally, Emily agreed to meet with me. We sat down at a coffee shop, and I poured my heart out to her. I told her how sorry I was, how much I loved her, and how I would do anything to make things right. But it was too late. Emily had already moved on, and she couldn't forgive me for what I had done.

After that day, I never saw Emily again. She moved out of our apartment, and I was left alone with my thoughts and my guilt. I realized that I had lost the person I loved most in the world because of my selfishness and cowardice.

Sarah and I continued seeing each other for a few more weeks, but it wasn't the same. The thrill of our secret romance had faded, and I was haunted by the memory of what I had done to Emily. I knew that I had to end things with Sarah and take responsibility for my actions.

It wasn't easy, but I finally worked up the courage to break things off with Sarah. I told her that I couldn't be with her anymore and that I needed to take some time to figure things out. She was hurt and angry, but she also knew that what we had done was wrong.

In the months that followed, I did a lot of soul-searching. I went to therapy, talked to friends and family, and tried to figure out why I had cheated on Emily. I realized that I had been unhappy in our relationship and had been too scared to admit it. Instead of