The Beginning or the End of the Rest of My Life

It was a very cold and rainy day the day it all started. Mom and Dad had been divorced now for about 3 years. We were living in Idaho, about 300 miles away from Grandma. Things in my life were perfect there. I had great friends, great teachers, great parents, heck even my siblings and I got along most of the time. However, little did I know my very perfect life was about to change.

Mom and Dad took us out to lunch this particular day, together. Now this was a very odd occurrence and usually meant big news. “Please get back together,” my little mind thought, “That would make my life even so much better!” However, my hopes and dreams were crushed when Mom and Dad sat me and my 2 sisters down to tell us we will be living with Dad at Grandma’s house for a period of time. This meant Mom was not getting back with Dad, it meant Mom had things to take care of on her own without us for a bit. Mom was not gone long as she missed us all very much and needed to be with her girls, however that is a totally different story there. However, at this moment all I could think was, “This is the end of my life! My life is over and nothing will ever get better!” Little did I know I was so wrong.

Dad got us enrolled into school right away in Montana. The fact that spring break had just ended meant I was switching schools in the middle of the year. I would become the new kid. I was actually excited for the new start though. This meant a chance for change, a chance for new friendships and great adventures.

Walking into the new school, little did I know how very awkward it would feel. Everyone knew everyone else already and I was new. Nobody wanted to talk to the new kid let alone be caught dead eating lunch with the weirdo who didn’t know anyone. I was stunned. As soon as I walked to the office to let them know I was new here and to ask where my class would be one girl actually talked to me. Her name was Kirsten. Kirsten's outfit itself said she too was an outcast and she understood what I was going through. “No pre-teen girl would be wearing a dress like that and not be made fun of,” I had thought to myself as I smiled at her for greeting me. I was indeed grateful for her talking to me, it made me feel less alone.

At my old school I often got in trouble for being disruptive or too talkative in class. Here, I didn’t feel like I quite fit in. “My life is over,” I would think to myself over and over on this day. As I sat there at lunch with Kirsten’s friends Emily, Amanda, and Chloe I was probably the quietest one there. I wanted to say something but I didn’t know these girls. None of them even seemed to notice my existence at the table anyway. It was definitely one of the hardest days of school I have ever experienced.

At the end of the school day, I nearly missed the bus due to the fact I didn’t know where the bus picked us up anyway. I saw Chloe get on the same bus as me but yet didn’t say a thing due to the simple understanding I had in my head that I was not welcomed as a friend, nor even at the school to begin with. When I got off at my stop Chloe shouted out to me, “Hey Brianna!” and as I turned around, she said, “that is your name, right?” I nodded my head in agreeance as I could not muster to get any words out. “We get off at the same stop, that must mean you live close to me then?” She said with a huge smile, “Maybe we could hang out sometime after school?” I probably looked like a fat kid that just saw the biggest candy store giving away free candy with how big I smiled at that. I simply said, “yea that would be great!” and went to turn around to walk home, the happiest kid ever. I thought nobody noticed me at that school and thought I was a huge nobody in everyone’s eyes. However, this other girl actually wanted to hang out with me!

Every day I went back to school, and each day got easier and easier. Even when you think things are awkward and you are doing everything backward that isn’t always the case. Some people do still notice you, regardless of how insecure you are about it yourself.