I'm 47 and My Sleep is a Threat To Society

I’m 47 Years Old and Sleep Is a Threat to Society

Let me be very clear about something.

I do not sleep.

Not because I don’t want to.
Not because I’m trying to be productive.
But because my brain refuses to shut the fuck down.

I am 47 years old, and sleep and I are no longer in a relationship. We are barely on speaking terms.

At night, when normal people are winding down, my brain clocks in like it just drank a Red Bull and slapped the time clock.

This is when I do my best work.

This is when I am:

writing stories people asked me to write

producing content

restructuring my entire business

redesigning my clothing line

planning luxury 420 corsets and blazers like it’s Fashion Week


Meanwhile, the rest of the world is unconscious.



My Brain Does Not Respect Time

I will lie down and say,
“Okay, let me go to sleep.”

And my brain immediately responds:

> “Absolutely not. Now seems like a great time to rethink your entire life.”



Thoughts start firing off like popcorn.

Ideas I didn’t care about all day suddenly become urgent.

Things I forgot for months show up like:

> “Hey girl, remember me?”



No.
No, I don’t want to remember you at 2:47 a.m.



Sleep Schedules Are a Myth

People love to say: “You need a routine.”

Baby.

I have tried.

My routine is chaos with ambition.

Some nights I’m up until 4 a.m.
Some nights I don’t sleep at all.
Some nights I sleep for three hours and wake up like, “That’s enough.”

My body does not acknowledge bedtime.

It acknowledges inspiration.


What I’m Actually Running On

Let’s talk about fuel.

Because it’s not sleep.

I am currently running on:

weed

hot fries

watermelon Kool-Aid

vibes

and audacity


That is my diet.

That is my sleep aid.

That is my lifestyle.

Is it healthy?
Probably not.

Is it effective?
Apparently, yes.

Because shit is getting done.



Nighttime Is When the Ideas Get Disrespectful

During the day, my brain is manageable.

At night?

That’s when it decides: “Let’s rebrand the whole company.”

Suddenly I’m sketching corsets in my head.
Thinking about fabric.
Thinking about tailoring.
Thinking about luxury pieces for the 420 community.

I’m designing blazers at 3 a.m. like: “This could work.”

Sleep is not invited to these meetings.



The Weed Does Not Help Like It Used To

Now let’s address the lie.

People say weed helps you sleep.

It USED TO.

Now?

It just makes my thoughts more creative.

Instead of sleeping, I’m sitting there like: “What if I did this differently?”

I’m high, hydrated, and fully invested in my future.

Meanwhile, my body is begging for rest.



Sleep Tries to Catch Me Slipping

Sometimes sleep sneaks up on me.

I’ll sit down for “just a minute.”

Next thing I know, I wake up confused, thirsty, and mad because now my schedule is ruined.

If I nap? I’m up all night.

If I don’t nap? I’m still up all night.

Explain the math.



Mornings Are Personal Attacks

Morning comes whether I’m ready or not.

And when I haven’t slept?

Everything is louder.

Lights are brighter.
Sounds are aggressive.
People talking too early is criminal.

I’m functional, but I’m not friendly.



The Real Problem Is My Brain Is Too Loud

This isn’t about insomnia.

This is about a brain that won’t stop producing.

I have ideas.
Goals.
Responsibilities.
Businesses.

My brain doesn’t want rest — it wants results.

So while other people are sleeping, I’m building.

Not because I want to be awake.

But because my brain said,
“We’re not done yet.”



Final Thoughts From a 47-Year-Old Who Does Not Dream — She Plans

Sleep is optional at this stage.

Not because I don’t value it.

But because my mind refuses to shut down long enough to enjoy it.

If you see me up at 3 a.m. posting, writing, designing, or reworking my entire life?

Mind your business.

I’ll sleep later.

Maybe.