I Fell for a Fantasy: Dating Someone Who Only Loved Me Online

The Internet Made It Feel Real - Until I Met Him in Person

It started with fire emojis.

Then the late-night replies.

The inside jokes. The saved voice notes. The “good morning” texts that made my heart race.

I thought I was falling in love.

Maybe I was. But only with the version of him that existed in my phone.

Because when we finally met offline…

he wasn’t the same person who sent me heart eyes and “thinking of you” GIFs at 2 a.m.

Digital Affection is Not the Same as Emotional Availability

He was attentive - when he had Wi-Fi.

He liked all my stories.

Reacted to my selfies.

Even called me “babe” in the DMs.

But when we sat across from each other at that coffee shop, he barely made eye contact.

No spark. No conversation. Just… awkwardness.

That’s when I realised: I was dating a persona.

A curated, filtered, performative version of someone who knew how to flirt with his thumbs -

but didn’t know how to show up in real life.

Online Chemistry Tricks You Into Thinking It’s Love

We mistake consistency for intimacy.

Memes for emotional support.

Story replies for commitment.

But digital affection is easy.

It’s showing up when it matters that’s hard.

I confused his responsiveness with genuine effort.

I thought he cared because he always replied.

But now I see - he was performing, not connecting.

Why So Many of Us Fall for People We’ve Never Truly Met

Because loneliness hits different at night.

Because screens make us feel safe.

Because we're all just a little bit scared of being seen, fully and unfiltered.

Dating online means we can present the best versions of ourselves -

the charming texter, the clever captioner, the emoji expert.

But love doesn’t live in our highlight reels.

It lives in the awkward silences, the early morning faces, the honest conversations.

It Wasn’t Him I Loved. It Was the Idea of Being Chosen

Looking back, I think I was more in love with the attention than the person.

He made me feel special.

He saw me when I was trying to be seen.

And I wanted so badly to believe that someone could actually love me for me - even through a screen.

But love isn’t real until it leaves the chat.

Until it turns up.

Until it looks you in the eye, not just taps your photo twice.

We Deserve More Than Emoji Love

We deserve real hugs, not just heart reacts.

We deserve effort that isn’t tied to Wi-Fi.

We deserve dates, not just digital breadcrumbs.

From now on, I’m saving my energy for people who meet me in the moment -

not just the inbox.

Because love is more than a vibe.

It’s presence. It’s attention.

It’s real, messy, and sometimes uncomfortable.

And I’m ready for that kind of love.

Your Turn:

Have you ever fallen for someone online who didn’t live up to the version they showed you?

Or maybe you’ve been that version yourself?

Drop your thoughts in the comments - because if there’s one thing we’ve all learned in this digital age,

it’s that “seen” doesn’t always mean understood. 💬👇