How A Short Sentence Like "I Do" Becomes A Life Sentence

I've had my share of setbacks throughout life, but the biggest challenge I encountered was my relationship with alcohol.

Much like many alcoholics I've met, I started drinking at a very young age. I grew up with an alcoholic father, something I was acutely aware of when I was very young.

Although they claim that alcoholism is hereditary, I refuse to blame my father for the problems that I brought onto myself.

I spent almost twenty five years drinking beer and strong alcoholic drinks, sometimes excessively, while at other times, very little to nothing at all. But the majority of my life was spent planning and chasing my next drink.

Alcohol carried me through my first divorce, many ruined friendships, and multitude address changes.

At one point in my life, I loaded up two of my children, along with anything I could cram into my car, and drove from where I live to another community about 28km away.

It never occurred to me how much damage I was doing to my children. The only thing that mattered was that I was able to drink when and where I wanted.

Those poor kids couldn't even go to a friendly restaurant for a meal with me because they didn't serve alcohol. We could only eat out if the establishment served beer or strong alcoholic drinks.

What Caused My Turn Around

One Friday evening, was the last normal day of my life.

A week earlier, I'd started a new job at a digital marketing company, I loved marketing and see it as one of the things I was born for.

I wanted to celebrate my first big career step.

So that day, my friends had a little party with me at home. I've decided to remain sober, entertain my friends because going high as the host will mess the party up.

Around 8pm a neighbour asked us to join in his house for a barbecue.

When we got there, he served several soft and hot drinks. He realised I looked calm and was not really drinking so he asked me "Do you Drink?", that was when I should I have said no.

A little confused, I said "Yes I Do" that was when I twisted everything.

I was served with various barrage of strong alcoholics.

Around 10 p.m., I kicked off the night with a vodka tonic to a local pub about 1.5km away. The excitement has started and I had no way of stopping it. It was all fun and out of control.

Around 1am I decided to drop my close pal at his house.

I don't remember ordering more drinks, but my friend said I downed a vodka and 7 Up and a shot of Jagermeister. 

A few moments later, we all walked down the street.

I was feeling much tipsy but didn't know I was that drunk. I've had to rely on other people's memories to patch together the next few hours.

Shortly afterward, at about 1.30 a.m., I climbed behind the wheel of my salon car. 

My very good friend strapped himself on the front seat by my side. My friend's place was just a few kilometres from the pub but we never got there.

I was going about 95 miles per hour on the same two-lane street I had taken every day to get to work. I knew that road so well … but that was sober.

We were about halfway to my friend's house, just past a bridge, when I turned a corner and lost control of the car.

The car veered to the right and spun around, jumped onto the sidewalk, continued spinning, and then stopped as we smashed into an alder tree. The car was nearly torn in half.

The police found me half-conscious and still strapped in behind the bent and broken steering wheel.

I had internal bleeding, a lacerated liver and spleen, a punctured colon, glass embedded along the right side of my head, and back fractures in two places.

My friend was rescued by the police unconscious with head, chest, and knee injuries. He had also suffered a massive damage to his lungs and his life hangs in a balance.

His family was mad and ready to nail all the charges against me should he lose his life. That could mean several years behind bars if not a life sentence.

The police measured my blood alcohol content. It was 0.18 percent, more than twice the legal limit. As it turned out, all two of us in the car were too drunk to drive.

The morning after the crash, I woke up in an intensive-care unit, hooked up to machines and monitors, with a 6-inch wound on my belly from emergency surgery.

I could barely move. My memory was hazy because of the pain medication. My doctor told me I was just an inch from death.

This accident was enough for me to finally decide to divorce myself completely from alcohol for the rest of my life no matter what.

Our Recovery

I was discharged from the hospital after series of surgeries and general rehabilitations in 9 months. I felt sober and became very reflective. I couldn't imagine this could have ended my life.

My friend finally recovered and was discharged after 16 months in the hospital but had home attendance continuously for over 2 years.

My Rehabilitation

My road to recovery was long and difficult, but in the end, rewarding.

I went through a lot of therapy, psychological reformations and behavioural transformations to deaden my appetite for alcohol and rather become a confederate against drunkenness.

During my years of reformation I realized one deadly thing about the appeal of alcohol especially against reformist.

And this is what I've found out;

Let's say you haven't had a drink for 2 years. One night, you give in and drink 2 beers and stop.

Your alcoholism just won the 1st battle. Now it speaks to your rationale. I only had 2 beers and stopped. Maybe I'm not an alcoholic after all.

A week later, you do the exact same thing again with your friends. Now there's definite proof that you can control your drinking.

But now instead of waiting to get together with your friends on the weekend, three days later you stop at a bar for happy hour to drink just those 2 beers and relax.

Ten beers later you stagger a little to your car and drive home intoxicated.

Later, you started buying alcoholic beverages to take home and drink.

Within a month you are back to drinking or even getting drunk on a daily basis and having cravings when you're not drinking all over again.

Alcohol is definitely a mocker like the bible said and I wouldn't encourage anyone to start if you haven't touched it yet.

Education is Very Important

During my reformation, I was taken through so much education because it's believed that education will assist in major decision making which is primary if one has to overcome.

I got to know that;

Stopping alcohol consumption can bring immediate relief.

For example, the avoidance of a hangover.

It can also avoid the discomfort and fatigue that alcohol can have in your body. This can allow you to wake up feeling more refreshed and well-rested, free from the typical hangover symptoms that accompany excess alcohol drinking: headache, nausea, and overall weakness.

Here's most of what I learned;

How Long Does Alcohol Stay In Your System?

The rate at which the liver breaks down or metabolizes alcohol depends on several factors like your genes, age, and weight, how much alcohol you consumed, and what you've eaten. 

These are new findings I had no idea of previously.

Depending on how it's measured, alcohol can stay in your system for 6–72 hours in most cases. 

For example, a blood or saliva test can detect alcohol in the blood for up to 12 hours.

Short-Term Effects of Stopping Drinking

Quitting alcohol for good may feel less challenging when approached with a short-term goal, such as abstaining for a short period or a month.

Focusing on the immediate, short-term effects of stopping drinking can provide tangible milestones along the path to long-term sobriety.

Getting to the end of a month without alcohol is a huge accomplishment.

By this time, physical withdrawal symptoms should've cleared and you may be experiencing less anxiety and depression.

Plus, you may notice improvements in your skin, experience deeper sleep and feel more energetic.

Common Withdrawal Symptoms

If you consume alcohol regularly, especially in large amounts, you're more likely to experience symptoms of alcohol withdrawal. Common withdrawal symptoms can include the following and usually begin 8 to 24 hours after the last drink:

Hand tremors

Sweating

Heart rate over 100 beats per minute

Nausea

Vomiting

Headaches

Decreased appetite

Anxiety

Irritability

Restlessness

Difficulty sleeping

Long-Term Benefits of Quitting Alcohol

Embarking on a journey of sustained sobriety brings forth many long-term benefits that extend beyond the initial phases.

You will normally witness profound transformations in your physical health, mental well-being, relationships, and overall quality of life.

Quitting alcohol has dramatically improved my work performance by allowing my brain to function optimally, free from impairments associated with drinking alcohol.

This has helped to enhance my concentration, cognitive skills, and productivity in general.

There was no way that I could concentrate and write over thousand words in one sitting, but as you can see, I've been writing on medium for more than 3 months with over 600 followers.

Having a sharper mind has improve my decision-making in personal life, such as prioritizing family time, managing finances, and taking on household responsibilities.

I have gained greater self respect and now all members of my family takes me serious and also respect me.

My Request For Everyone Here

If you haven't started please keep away and find other ways by which you could fill up your spare time.

If you drink, please know your limit and adhere to strict control and don't drive when you believe you feel a bit tipsy.

Listen to your close friends and especially your parents if you have one. When they say you are too drunk to drive, please listen.

Life is more important than a few shots of vodka or whisky, what seems like fun and excitement could be the end of your life or the life of a loved one.