Crush

For the longest time I’ve had the most amazing crush on you, yet you don’t know my name. You probably would remember what I look like though–my features are quite distinct. It’s been weeks since the last time I stopped at your diner for breakfast, but I’ll bet if someone were to describe what I look like to you, you would immediately remember what I am. That’s quite unfortunate because the reason I stopped coming by the diner was because I feared you might someday realise that I’m the one penning this love letter to you.

I had no choice but to put all of this into writing. I fear the words would evaporate like my thoughts and I wouldn’t be able to recollect what I’m feeling right now: longing mixed with joy knowing that sooner or later, this letter would meet you, and hopefully then you would know someone out there thinks highly of you.

Forgive me if the words I’m using seem startling to you. I would rather prefer to meet you and say these words to you than include them in this letter. However, I’m pretty much a stranger, and would rather you assume me to be a friendly one than to be considered a stalker. I mean you no harm except to declare my feelings towards you, even though I cannot dare make this letter brief.

You do know my name, and I reckon you’ll remember it should I reveal myself to you in person or through the contents of this letter. I was once a regular in your establishment, like some many other regulars there who’d stop over for a quick breakfast or lunch before moving onward to their business.

Once, during the early stages of me visiting there, I was crestfallen as I had recently lost my job, my previous job. You caught the downcast look on my brow as I struggled to give you my order. I haplessly apologised and explained to you my predicament. You were politely accommodating towards my plight, and you even mentioned some encouragement to me and said, “It’s not the end of the world; something good is coming along the corner. You wait and see.”

Yes, those were your exact words. Your words brightened my day, as did your delicious meal after you served it to me. I went home that day feeling like I was on top of the world. That was when I began making your diner establishment a true rest stop of mine. I have no idea if you enticed other customers aside from me with your ebullient wit, but I’ve been fortunate to see how well you easily get along with people whenever you approach their table to inquire if they were doing good or needed anything. So often, you have approached me to ask if I needed more coffee or anything. I could never get past your charming smile. It is like staring directly at the sun; I could never survive such brilliance.

I am unafraid to declare that I am enchanted by your serene disposition anytime I see you. Your serenity radiates on your features; it makes you look like a true guardian angel.

I’m sorry if my words seem to be going on a different tangent. I merely want to reveal to you how moving you are in every way to me every time I’m near your presence. It’s partly why I haven’t stopped by your establishment since, as I feared I was getting too much. I want to let you know that good things have happened to me since the last time I saw you. I’ve gotten another job, one that pays ten times better than my last, and you were the first person who came to mind when that happened. There’s no great way to show my thanks or appreciation besides including it in this letter I’m sharing with you.

I am enclosing my address at the back of this envelope, though the name on it isn’t mine. There’s little chance I might get a reply from you, and I can understand. As I mentioned in the beginning, I’m nothing but a stranger. Should you ever have the courage to write back, and I hope you do, I hope my words bring some hint of your smile today as yours often did whenever I waited for you to stop at my table. And I hope my words would appeal to your better self to afford me the chance to return to your diner and ask you out for dinner sometime.

Until then, I’ll keep on carrying your enchanting smile in my memory.

Yours truly.

–S.