Tribulation Bay Chapter SIX

Miss McGrudibeggar strutted down the aisle of the church like a peacock that was in heat. She wore an over-sized feather hat that had so many feathers on it calling it overkill would be the understatement of the year. One obnoxiously long feather hung down the back of the hat giving the appearance of a cat's tail. On her ears were large emerald earrings that swung about hypnotically as she moved about. As for her dress, it was straight out of the Victorian era website with blue trim. People turned to her, not in awe of her get-up but in near disgust. Most others wore less ornate clothes like jeans and a golf shirt. “Am I the only one here who cares about how they dress for Church?”

“Will you just sit down?” A voice called out, they were only glad the actual service hadn't started yet.

“I'll sit down when I'm good and ready!” Miss McGrudibeggar made a pretense of looking around for a place to sit, but she already had set in her head where she was specifically going to sit; the pew directly in front of where Dawn Collins was sitting, but the seat was already taken. “I'd move from that seat if I were you!”

The person refused to move.

“Now!”

“You better do as the Karen says,” someone leaned over to the person who refused to move.

“The name is Karina, NOT Karen. I know that to your untrained ears they might sound the same, but--.”

“Just to shut you up!” the person finally slid down to open the spot Miss McGrudibeggar was so desperate to sit in, despite there being a dozen other seats she could have much more conveniently sat in.

Miss McGrudibeggar looked at the rather large spot created for her to sit. “Thank you!”

“Will you please sit down?” Carolyn demanded. “The service is about to start.”

“Yes,” Miss McGrudibeggar said loudly, “the service is about to start, and where is your older daughter. Oh, I know she's back in Philadelphia WHORING herself out to everyone who comes her way!”

“What are you talking about?” Dawn spoke as she sat there with her cellphone pointed at the older woman, for she was recording the entire ordeal so she could send it to Rachael later on.

Clark awoke after almost 12 hours of sleep with Rachael comfortably laying next to him in nothing but her bra and panties, and him in his boxers. “Getting used to the idea of being in the same bed without any clothes on, huh?”

“Look, I know we're engaged, and you probably want to take the fast track to getting married. But keep in mind, I am a preacher's daughter, and we don't want any incidences that need to be explained away, especially with my father starting in a new church.”

“I know that,” Clark sighed, “but I'm sure, things like touching and kissing we can do.”

“That I can do,” Rachael leaned in for a long kiss.

“Please,” Carolyn insisted, “tell me where you got that information from.”

“Well,” Miss McGrudibeggar gaped, “it came from the pastors mouth just yesterday!”

“No.” Andrew spoke up. “What you say I said, and what I actually said are two entirely different lines of thinking. And what I actually said was that Rachael was back in Philly with her boyfriend (to whom she is engaged) helping him settle a few things so he can come here to live with us.”

“Wow,” Natty said as she came to Andrew's side, she was not in her police uniform, but in a stylish t-shirt and jeans, “I've dealt with people giving false testimonies before, but this takes the cake.”

“Well,” Miss McGrudibeggar groaned out, “I was just assuming that was the case.”

“Do you know what happens when you assume?” Dawn gave Miss McGrudibeggar a hard stare as she waited for the answer. She was still recording the incidence with her phone.

“No,” Miss McGrudibeggar looked down her nose at Dawn, “what happens?”

“You makes an ASS of U M E.”

Miss McGrudibeggar's mouth hung open. “Such language from the pastor's daughter in the middle of a church service to boot.”

“Oh, and I guess calling my sister, whom you haven't even met yet, a whore for no reason at all in the middle of a church service to boot is OK?”

“I never said that,” Miss McGrudibeggar scrunched her face up, “did I?”

“Yes you did,” the entire congregation said.

“Well I never!” Miss McGrudibeggar got up and began to leave the church.

“You might be interested in the sermon topic.”

“And what is that?” Miss McGrudibeggar stopped, but didn't look back.

“Bearing false witness,”

At that moment, Miss McGrudibeggar felt every eye fall on her.

“Now sit down where you were sitting.”

Miss McGrudibeggar sat back down, but so that the feathers continuously brushed against Dawn's face, to which Dawn ripped the hat off her head and threw it like an ornate Frisbee into the corner of the sanctuary.

Frank Sloan leaned over and whispered into Natty's ear. “I have a feeling things are going to get very interesting in this sleepy little town!”

Immediately after the service Miss McGrudibeggar grabbed Andrew by the arm and looked him in the eye. “That was NOT the sermon that I wrote for you to preach and you know it!”

“No... really?” Andrew said flippantly. “Listen, I don't know what issues you have and what they have to do with my family, but you started the moment I arrived at my house and I want you to stop!”

“You want me to stop? You want me to stop?”

“Do. Do. Do-do-do-do. It's the final brain-cell!” Dawn began to sing out as she passed by Miss McGrudibeggar with her eyes crossed.

“Why you little piece of shit!” Miss McGrudibeggar raised her hand up to swat at Dawn.

“Go on,” Dawn looked around at the 50 witnesses who were all looking to see what was going to happen next, “hit me with your best shot!”

“Why do you dislike my family so?” Carolyn stepped in between Miss McGrudibeggar & Dawn.

“I don't think she can help herself!” Frank Sloan said.

“She was the only one who voted for the other pastoral candidate,” Natty said.

“What, the stutter-bum who couldn't even properly formulate a proper sentence, let along get through his sermon?” Frank asked.

“That wasn't the reason I voted for him.”

“I hope it wasn't for his looks,” Natty responded.

“Well,” Miss McGrudibeggar responded, “if you look past certain things, he wasn't too bad looking.”

“Oh,” Dawn smiled coyly, “you wanted him to become the preacher over my father, because you thought you'd make him your boyfriend.”

Miss McGrudibeggar glare at Dawn, but said nothing. As there were a few chuckles from the others.

“Well,” Dawn said, “that's how this whole thing is coming across to me!”

Dawn had found a small area of beach that was adjacent to their house, and was cut off from view from the rest of town, and what seemed to be the main path to it came from behind her house. While it was a chilly day out, the sun was warm and inviting. She wasn't alone on the beach, as she sat on a blanket tanning her bare upper body she took to watching a surfer girl who seemed to be not much older than her riding the waves on an ornate surfboard. As she watched the girl ride the waves, she talked on the phone with Rachael.

“...anyway, I just wanted to give you a heads up.” Dawn spoke into the phone.

“What about?” Rachael looked at Dawn through the screen, she noticed that Dawn had no top on. “Wait, are you bare-topped?”

“Yeah,” Dawn responded, “so?”

“And you're on a beach.”

“I have a feeling it sorta belongs to us, because the main path to it begins behind our house.”

“Oh, that'll be nice come summer,”

“I know, right?”

“Anyway, about your heads up, what's it about?”

“You've already got a mortal enemy!”

“Uh,” Rachael's face scrunched up, “how? I'm not even there yet?”

“Not to worry, it's just some crazy lady who likes to hear herself talk, but doesn't know what she's even talking about!”

“Oh,” Rachael sighed, “one of those.”

“She looks like she orders her stuff out of Victorian Secrets.”

“Your probably thinking of Victoria's Secret,”

“No, because she dresses like she's living in the Victorian era,”

“Oh.”

“She made a scene just before church, I caught it on video if you want to see it.” Dawn forwarded the video to Rachael.

After watching it through, Rachael responded. “Listen, just ignore her when you see her in town, I know I will.”

“What about when she comes up to our house at the midnight hour?”

“We'll figure it out.” Rachael decided to change the subject. “So, make any actual friends yet?”

“I'm not sure on that one,” Dawn looked up to see the surfer-girl she was watching walking up to her, and stand over her.

“What do you mean?”

Dawn flipped the camera so that it was focused on the surfer-girl that was standing over her, not yet sure if she were friend or foe.

Carolyn inspected the large pot of chili that she set up before church, it was getting close to being ready, and she gave it a stir. As she moved around the kitchen, Andrew was yammering on and on about what was actually his least favorite person in town.

“I'm sure we can have the sheriff tell us how we can put up a restraining order against her.” Carolyn said.

“And how would it look, the town pastor whose supposed to be available to his congregants 24/7 having a restraining order set up against one of their congregants within the first 48 hours of moving in?”

“Mind if I come in?” A voice came from the main door called out.

“Who is it?” Carolyn moved from the kitchen to the living room so she could see who was at the door, she noticed it was the Sheriff, by this time she was in her official uniform. “Oh, Sheriff Chen.”

“This is a social visit anyway,” came the response, “the only time I expect you to call me by that name is when I'm here on official business. Otherwise you can just call me by my first name.”

“Well, Natsukioni is a bit harder to say,”

“Most people just call me Natty,” came the smile.

“Well, come on in, my husband and I were just having a conversation that could use your input,”

“About?”

“A certain Miss McGrudibeggar,” Carolyn explained as she lead Natty into the kitchen.

“That woman is a nuisance that just doesn't know when to quit,” Andrew spoke up, “and her out of left field accusation about someone she hasn't even met yet takes the cake.”

“I was there,” Natty said, “remember? The best thing you can do is record any and all interaction with her on your cellphone that way you can report any unwanted interaction with her to either me or one of my deputies. Then we can take any appropriate action against her.”

Dawn looked up at the surfer-girl as she was undoing her wet-suit, and lowered the top so that the sun can hit her chilled skin. “Talk to later.” She hung up the phone and put it away. “Uh--. Hi.”

“Hi,” the surfer-girl smiled as she put on a gray tank top. She was in her upper teens with long black hair and brown eyes. “I'm guessing you're with the family that just moved into the parsonage?”

“I am,” Dawn realized that she herself was laying there topless, and moved to put her shirt on, “the name's Dawn Collins.”

“Cordelia, which means “daughter of the sea”, which is fitting because I spend a lot of time either on the water or under it.”

“I kinda wish I were as comfortable in the water as you, but I'm not.”

“Why's that?” Cordelia sat down on the beach towel Dawn was sitting on.

“Grew up in Philly, not too many places to swim.”

“True,” Cordelia looked around at the virtually private beach, “but you're in a good spot to learn, and I can be a good teacher.”

“It's the middle of winter!”

“OK, maybe not right now. Because even with a wet-suit on, you need to be conditioned to swimming in the water this cold. But come spring, I can teach you.”

“Cool,”

“Dawn,” Carolyn called out from the top of the path, “time for lunch!”

“OK,”

“Do you think there's room for one more?” Cordelia asked.

“Today's chili day, and she usually makes enough to feed an entire army.”

“OK.”

“Who's your friend?” Carolyn asked.

“Her name's Cordelia,” Dawn said.

“And I have a feeling we're going to be good friends,” Cordelia added as she followed Dawn and her mother up to the house, with a look of uncertainty on her face. “I hope.”