Harper's Hill, Chapter 17: The Secret That Changes Everything

Emily stopped speaking, stopped moving. She looked her Dad right in the eyes and asked him directly, "what are you talking about?"

Raymond didn't really know how to say what he was about to say.

It had happened in the middle of the summer, years ago, back when Emily was 13 and James was 15. He remembered the day clearly. He was going out that afternoon to do things he shouldn't have been doing, and he always thought that what had happened was his karma for being a colossal idiot.

After roaming around the usual spots for a bit and finally finding what he needed, he headed up to the beer store to grab his daily 6-pack. No one knew how Raymond afforded this. He would say he was doing what he needed to do to survive.

He started to head towards the back of the building, where he would sit sometimes and crack open a can of beer, and he was startled to see his 15 year old son, James, standing there. He was tense, standing there still, staring at Raymond like he owed him something. To be honest, it terrified him.

"Hey James..." Raymond said, starting to slowly walk past James and head towards his spot. "Come with me, we'll sit down and have a beer." He had never offered James a beer before, but he had also never seen James like this. What the hell, he thought, Raymond himself was drinking at the age of 13, so did it really matter?

He felt James following him, staring him down. He slowed down a bit to try and walk with James, but James just stopped walking, almost as if he wanted to stay behind Raymond. Almost as if he was the guard leading him to his death.

Raymond had tried to ignore the heat on his neck, the feeling in his stomach — that same feeling he got when he was dealing with someone dangerous on the streets. After all these years, he had come to know that look, and it was the look of someone who had finally snapped.

As soon as Raymond and James were out of sight, James immediately grabbed Raymond by the front of his shirt and slammed him against the wall. Raymond was so surprised by the action and his son's force that he had no choice but to stare, his 6-pack clattering to the pavement.

"James... wha—"

"Shut the fuck up," James said, his tone sharp.

Raymond was shocked. He tried to get out of his son's grip. "Let go of me James," He said, his tone turning serious.

James's tone turned even sharper. "I said to shut the fuck up!" He spit into his father's face, something dark and haunted taking over his soul as he stared down into his father's.

Raymond swallowed and stood there, not sure how to react. For the first time in a long time, he prayed. He prayed that someone would come around the corner, he prayed that James would realize what he was doing somehow and back off... because when it came down to it, Raymond wasn't as tough as he seemed.

James stared at Raymond, and then finally started to speak as he let go of his father's shirt. "I'm going to say this one time, and I'm not going to stutter, and you're going to listen to what I have to say," James commanded, and then pointed a finger at Raymond. "Do you understand?"

Raymond nodded. He watched his son and just remembered. He remembered his father talking to his mother like this, he remembered his father talking to him like this, and finally, he remembered himself talking to his wife like this. He was remembering and recognizing all the worst parts of himself in James, and he felt like he was in hell, watching his son transform into the worst version of himself.

"You will never step foot into our house again," James told Raymond.

"What are you talking about?" Raymond asked incredulously. "It's my house. How are you gonna pay a mortgage?"

"I'm not an idiot Raymond, I know we don't own the house. We pay rent. And I don't know if you've noticed, but I've been working now for 2 years. I've been saving up. I've been waiting for this," James explained, every word coming out of his mouth stinging Raymond even more. "We finally don't need you anymore. We finally have enough for you to leave."

"How the fuck—"

"That's not your concern. All you need to know is that I'm figuring it out. I've already planned to leave school so I can work more and take care of things," James said, feeling assured. "You're not needed."

"I'm not leaving," Raymond laughed. "Who do you think you are?"

"I think I'm better than you," James said, his voice getting sharp again. "Actually, I know I'm better than you. I know that I'm going to be a better father figure to Emily than you could ever be, I know that you leaving will be the best thing that ever happened to her, and you know what else I know, dad?"

Raymond was genuinely afraid to ask, but he had to bluff. "What else do you know, James?"

James stepped close, forcing Raymond against the wall, their faces inches from each other. "I know that if you ever come back to that house, I will beat you so hard... you will wish that you were dead instead."

Back in the real world, Raymond recounted the story to Emily, skipping some details but keeping the moral the same. And that moral? James had been lying.

Emily just stared, not knowing what to say. She felt so stupid, she felt so betrayed, she felt like she was feeling every single negative emotion all at once and that she was going to explode.

Without a word, Emily left. She didn't know who she was more upset at — James for threatening their father, or their father for just giving up on them.

Once she got into her car, she started it with shaky hands and took a deep breath as she pulled out of the driveway. Just get out of here, was all she thought — she just needed to get to somewhere safe. She turned down an almost-empty street and pulled into the driveway of an abandoned construction site, turning off her car and sitting back.

Emily screamed in anguish. She cried out, pounding her hands against the steering wheel. She felt like her whole world was crumbling around her. Everything that she had known, or more likely — everything she thought that she had known... it was all wrong. How? How could she not have known? How could James have done this to her, lied to her like this, and then pretend to be the good guy this whole entire time? He even acted like he was a victim, for fuck's sakes!

Emily didn't know where to go. She didn't want to go home, but she also didn't really want to go to the Leigh household and have to face anyone. After a few silent minutes, she wiped the tears from her face and started her car again.

Emily didn't know where she was going, so she just drove.