Harper's Hill, Chapter 16: Little Emily May

"Well, this is it."

Emily looked at her reflection in the mirror for the millionth time, deciding to make that last look the final one. "Okay, you can do this."

No one had any idea that Emily was going to meet up with her Dad.

It had been hard for Emily to decide where they would meet up, as the only real meeting place around, Morgan Diner, was owned by Riley's parents. She would be recognized immediately, and she kind of wanted to keep this under the radar for now.

She finally agreed to go to Raymond's house, though she was nervous about it, but she kept telling herself over and over — this was her father and there was no reason to be nervous. At least, he had been her father at some point. Now he felt like a stranger.

Maybe all of that would change today. Emily looked down at the address she had scribbled onto a torn piece of paper — 54 Pine Way. When Emily checked her Facebook two nights before, she had a message from a Raymond Pierce, who had just created an account. She figured that if her father created an account just to message her, he must really want to see her.

She agreed to come over to his house two days later, and this was it. She suddenly found herself in her car, realizing that her own thoughts were so dominating right now that she wasn't even paying attention to what she was doing. She actually had to get out of the car and make sure she locked the front door (which she did), and then she was back in the car, heading across the East side to her father's house.

As she drove across the East side, she observed her small surroundings and noted how her story felt so big right now, but that must have just been because it was her own life. She got lost in thoughts about how people must get wrapped up in their own stories all the time, how something so small could seem so big... but this really was big. She hadn't seen her father in about 10 years now, she didn't even know if she'd recognize him. Would he recognize her?

As she turned onto Pine Way and examined the house numbers, she noticed that 54 Pine Way was familiar. She swore that she had been here before. She didn't know how she knew this place, but she did.

54 Pine Way sat on the end of the street, on the edge of the forest. It was a large lot with a large house that looked like any other house, and the large four car driveway had been completely cleared, a shovel leaning against a large hill of snow beside the house.

Emily pulled into the driveway but didn't turn off her car. She put the vehicle into park and pulled out her phone, messaging Raymond on Facebook:

Hey.

I'm here.

Can I park in the driveway or do I need to go out onto the street?

Emily waited, tapping her phone and staring up at the house in anticipation.

Her phone buzzed.

You can park in the driveway, come on in.

Emily locked her phone and turned off her car, getting out and heading up the driveway. Luckily, someone had salted, and she didn't have to worry about slipping.

Once she got up to the door, she took a deep breath. As she pulled herself together, she heard shuffling behind the door. As soon as her knuckles hit the wood, it swung open.

Like she suspected, she didn't recognize the man that stood in front of her. The Raymond Pierce that she knew was a scruffy man with a long beard and long hair. His eyes were sunken in and he always looked sad.

This man had a bit of hope in his eyes, and he looked a little bit fresher than he had before, even though it was 10 years later. He had his hair cut short, and he did have some facial hair, but more of a five 'o'clock shadow than a beard.

He smiled at Emily immediately. He wanted to pull her close, call her his little Emily May, but he knew that's not who she was anymore. He stepped back. "Come in."

Emily didn't step in right away. "I have a question first," She said shyly, and then she regained her confidence. "Are you clean?"

Raymond wasn't surprised by the question, but he wasn't insulted either. He nodded, and then said confidently, "Yes."

Emily nodded and stepped into the house. As her father closed the door behind her, she looked around. It looked like what a house would look like if four adult men lived there — it was clean, but there were definitely signs of life. Video game controllers on the coffee table, tv playing something incoherent, a pair of pants hung over the back of a chair.

Raymond followed Emily's eyes and quickly grabbed the pants. "Sorry," He said, "I don't know whose those are. As you know, I live with three other men."

Emily started to take off her coat. "How does that work for you?" She asked. "You know, for your sobriety?"

Raymond smiled as he folded up the pants and put them down on the chair. "It's great," He said. "It's a good situation for all of us." He took Emily's coat from her and hung it up, and then led her into the living room. Switching off the tv, he sat down on one of the black leather couches. "Do you want something to drink, Emily?" It felt nice just to say her name again.

Emily sat down on the opposite couch from her father and shook her head. "No, thank you," She said. She looked around for a second, and then said. "Did you guys ever send me over here to get babysat?"

Raymond looked at Emily quizzicly for a second, and then realization flashed in his eyes. "You know, I think the Graziano's lived here," He said slowly. "David, Gayle..."

"Didn't their daughter Julie watch James and I sometimes?" Emily asked.

Raymond snapped his fingers. "That's it. Julie Graziano was a great babysitter." He felt sad for a moment, remembering how him and Sharon would always get babysitters when the kids were young so they could go out and get up to no good. "I'm surprised you remember that."

Emily raised an eyebrow slightly. "I remember a lot more than you think, trust me."

The room was quiet, and Emily could hear someone upstairs moving around. She decided there was no point beating around the bush anymore. She looked straight at her father. "I'm here because I'm mad," She said. "I'm pissed."

Raymond didn't say anything, he knew better. He just let her speak.

"You were my father, and after mom died, you were all we had left," Emily started. "You must have known how hard it was for me, to lose her like that. Especially like that. And then you leave. It really doesn't make any sense.

"You didn't even say goodbye... And I thought I meant more to you than that, you know? I thought I was... I thought I was your little girl. Your Emily May. I know I was growing up and maybe you thought I didn't need you anymore..."

Emily swallowed down her tears.

"But I still did. I still fucking needed you and you weren't there. You left."

Emily felt like there was more to say, but she didn't know how to say it. She sat back on the couch, feeling defeated, staring down at her lap.

Raymond, feeling unsure, spoke quietly. "Emily," He said. "That's not exactly what happened."

Little did Emily know, her father was about to reveal to her that he had never left on his own accord... he was asked to leave.