dust through the light

They explained things to him - his name (Wally? Really?), how he’s a (retired) superhero speedster (or used to be at least; he can’t even run faster than Robin now), who was attending Stanford (nice, high-five, Wally) before he…ceased (he notices the way everyone pauses before saying it) eleven months ago. You know, normal, ordinary things, all of which he accepts just fine. He’s a blank slate; he could have been the President of the United States for all he knew.

But what he doesn't understand is why the blonde girl dressed in orange and black keeps avoiding him. For some reason, he remembers the tall guy in the dark glasses who was there when he came back, but that guy hasn't shown up since. But her. She doesn't come to the cave often, but when she does, she does everything she can to steer clear of him. Naturally, he wouldn't have noticed, or cared, if someone didn't talk to him, since he wouldn't have known if they knew each other before he got sucked into the speedforce, but her evasion of him is too obvious to ignore.

The girl they call Tigress never speaks directly to him, leaves the room when he enters, doesn't meet his eyes. They must have a history - friends, lovers, something, but damn it, he can’t remember. Every time he tries, he comes up empty. His mind literally feels like a blank piece of paper. Black Canary, with her gentle voice that belies her fighting prowess, tells him his memories will come back in time, and he believes her. Until then, he can do nothing but wait, while the hole in his chest slowly widens.

He’s asked the others, but they never tell him anything useful - it’s always something along the lines of you should ask Aqualad and when he does Kaldur doesn't tell him anything substantial either, just looks at him with those light, solemn eyes of his. Just yesterday, he asked that green kid - Beast Boy - and the kid literally ran away from him.

The only rational reason that everyone doesn't tell him, he figures, is to protect her. Maybe they were together, and maybe they loved each other, and maybe she’d made her peace with his death. Maybe she didn't think he’d come back.

He doesn't really have anything to do - he just came back from the dead, what? - so he hangs out at the cave most of the time, which is better than doing nothing in a house that doesn't really feel like home, with parents whose love he can feel but not remember. His stuff isn't even in his room - when he asks his parents, his mother says “oh, most of it’s at - ”. Her voice catches and she clears her throat. “In storage. We’ll get it out for you, dear.” “Thanks mom.” He smiles at her and she squeezes his arm. On an instinct he draws her close into a hug and it almost feels like home.

He watches her train. While she excels in hand to hand combat, she runs the obstacle course with ease, like she’s done it a hundred times before. She’s fast and agile, and her aim is impeccable. She draws her crossbow, her arm a straight, perfect line and hits her target every time. He watches her duck and roll and leap and dive fearlessly, deftly navigating the course, as lithe as her namesake. She does a handspring and kicks a dummy in the head, and he feels a little bit in love.

When she notices him watching, an imperceptible frown creases her features. Her eyes are grey.

“What?” He can’t keep the edge out of his voice.

Taken aback, her hard gaze slides downwards. “Nothing. She mutters. Her voice is warm and husky. It slips into his chest, and his mind goes blank.

She wears orange, but when he goes to sleep at night his dreams are all green.