The Diary of Emptiness

The Diary of Emptiness

(A story about depression)

The evening is as grey as any other.

The window of Rina is open. A cool breeze flows in. Still, the room feels heavy, as if every breath of air carries the weight of sorrow. A pen, an open diary, and a few medications are scattered around her bed. On the diary’s page, it reads—

"Nothing feels right today either. There’s a hollow emptiness inside me. So many things around, yet nothing at all. People laugh, talk, run with life. And me? I feel trapped." Rina is pursuing an English major at Dhaka University. She used to be a bright student, never fell behind in class. But now, even textbooks seem to chase her down.

Waking up in the morning feels like a burden. Washing her face, eating, attending class—every small task feels like a war.

When she stands in front of the mirror, she doesn’t recognize herself. Hair tangled, eyes exhausted, skin pale.

If someone saw her now, they would ask, “Are you okay?”

But Rina no longer knows how to answer that question.

Because she doesn’t know if she is okay.

Her depression didn’t begin with one big event. There was no specific trigger. She had things in life—friends, family, dreams, even love.

But over time, everything began to fade.

At first, the sadness came and went. Then it became routine.

She couldn’t sleep at night, cried at dawn, felt suffocated all day.

One day, she sat alone on the hostel rooftop. She looked down, wondering—

“If life has no meaning, then what’s the point of dragging it on?”

Just then, a voice behind her called—

“Hey Rina, what are you staring at?”

She turned around, startled.

Her classmate Arpa was the person. Her usual smile was there, but her eyes were filled with concern.

Rina tried to smile back and said, “Nothing.”

Arpa sat beside her, staying silent for a while. Then she inquired: Rina, how are you doing? Honestly.”

And for the first time, Rina broke down in tears.

Arpa hugged her tightly.

That was the first time Rina told someone—she was not okay.

Since that day, Arpa stood by her side. Rina was taken to a counselor by her. At first, Rina didn’t want to go.

She thought, “Am I crazy?”

But slowly, she realized—mental illness is just like physical illness.

It shouldn’t be denied or hidden.

Through counseling, Rina learned to recognize her emotions.

She began taking the medication that was prescribed to her and continued to keep a diary. Every day, she wrote something—be it joy or pain.

Gradually, she began to rediscover herself.

She desired to read poetry and listen to music once more. Maybe everything isn’t fixed yet. Maybe the darkness still returns sometimes.

But now she knows—she is not alone.

And it’s okay to talk about how you feel.

Today, she writes in her diary again—

"I saw a bird outside my window today. I kept looking at it for a long time. I never noticed such things before. Now, small things bring me joy again. I know I’ll be okay. Slowly. I just need to learn to love myself."

The room light turns on.

The last light of the afternoon filters in through the window.

Rina gets up from her bed, stands before the mirror.

Looking into her own eyes, she says—

“You are not alone.”

Final Note:

This isn’t just Rina’s story—it’s the story of thousands of young people who battle depression every day.

If you know someone who’s struggling, ask them, “How are you?”

Sometimes, that one question can change a life.