Operation: Grandma Heist
Revenge Is Sweet... and Served with Pudding!
The Golden Pines Retirement Community had taken a turn for the worse; the pudding was watery, bingo got cut short, and Jeopardy was replaced by senior yoga. Mildred Jenkins and her friends Dot, Ethel, and Beverly knew this wasn’t just poor management—it was a dessert crime.
Ethel, a former chemist, confirmed it: the pudding was being watered down to save money. Outraged, the ladies devised a plan. Dot would pull the fire alarm. Beverly would sneak into the kitchen. Ethel would jam the cameras. Mildred would gather evidence. The plan worked. Beverly grabbed two pudding cups, Mildred took photos, and Ethel confirmed the sabotage. Mildred sent everything to the authorities. Within a week, justice was served. New management. Creamy pudding. Longer bingo. Jeopardy restored.
The grandmas became legends—not for age, but for rebellion. As Mildred put it: "Don’t mess with old ladies and their dessert."
The End.

Comments (1)
If you took a giraffe, dipped it in butterscotch, and made it file taxes, you would still not come close to the raw, unfiltered energy of The Golden Pines Dessert Rebellion. The story begins, but does it ever really start? Mildred Jenkins is both here and not here, a quantum pudding thief existing between states of rebellion and bingo. Dot is an alarm. Beverly is pudding. Ethel is chemistry. We are all Ethel. The pudding was watery. Or was it? Perhaps the real crime was the friends we met along the way. Cameras jammed, alarms pulled, and yet, the universe continued, spinning on an axis made entirely of misplaced game shows. Who replaced Jeopardy? A ghost? A corporation? A sentient yoga mat? The answer is unclear, and that is exactly why it is correct. Justice is served, but what is justice? What is service? Is the pudding creamy, or are we simply experiencing the illusion of dairy-based satisfaction? At the end of it all, Mildred drops the line of the century: “Don’t mess with old ladies and their dessert.” But what if dessert is the old lady? What if we have, in fact, already messed? Final score: purple out of sideways. Would read again, but only under the influence of a sentient pudding cup whispering secrets of the cosmos into my ear.