Hair

Give me lots of hair man shoulder length or longer.

Now that I have typed that line, and broke out in song next to my iPhone I expect FaceBook, Instagram, even Alexa to start sending me ads for hair.

I'm not sure how they do it, but they always find me. They always have the latest new style and technique that I absolutely must-have for .. some... reason.

I have to tell you a little bit about myself for you to understand the weird power these ads have over me.

I AM NOT A HAIR GIRL, MAKEUP GIRL, FLASHY CLOTHES GIRL.

Yes. You read that right. I am not a girl that keeps her hair slayed, laid, or sprayed in any way. My edges are wild and unruly and my lipgloss ain't poppin' its Carmex. My uniform of choice is a sarcastic tee, pair of jeggings, and a ponytail or no ponytail however my hair is that's how it will be somedays. I am very quick to toss on a ball cap or my cover of choice: A wig.

I remember purchasing my first wig she was a cheap 16 inch, 19 dollars, synthetic bob, but she was pretty. I remember the ease of just tossing her on and hitting the door. No muss no fuss. A wig was a way for me to avoid doing my natural hair. Now I know what you are thinking, Don't you have to keep your hair up underneath to wear a wig? The answer should be yes, but in my case not so much.

As I got older it seemed like I started to collect wigs just to have them and was always the newest type, store, brand, etc. If I could afford it I was getting it. I graduated from beauty supply stores to Ali express to whatever store that would catch my eye on social media and some of them were scams. I still kept buying.

How much do I buy?

I have spent anywhere from $12.99 for a wig up to $899. Buying products to style the wig also add to the cost. Special combs and brushes, glues, and sprays are a requirement to keep the hair you barely wear in tip-top shape. If a brand like LuvMe advertised that GhostBond Glue works best with its wigs, guess what I am buying? I have purchased wigs in my sleep from Amazon (a sad, but very true story). This particular incident forced me to remove all my debit and credit cards from my cell phone. It became too easy to click and buy a wig at 1:30 in the morning too hard to cancel it because it magically shipped at 8 am. As I write this article LuvMe hair has emailed me, texted me and I know if I open up Tik Tok or Instagram LuvMe will be waiting. Ok, I have to be serious about this headband wig look at how cute it is. It looks so convenient as if you truly can just toss it on and go... Oooh, and they have a payment plan

The brand I stalk...

Now, I have paid lots of money for lots of hair, but there is one brand that doesn't need to stalk me I follow it willingly.

This is Alonzo Arnold and he makes the softest, lightest wigs I have ever seen and I... want...one. Do I need it? Nope, but there is something about it that if I get it I would have finally found the perfect wig and I will feel complete.

So what's the problem? Why haven't I purchased this magical game-changing wig? Well, Mr. Alonzo charges upwards of $1700 (even with a payment plan) for a unit plus install, and no matter how many times I have put that in my cart I just couldn't justify purchasing something I knew I would only wear once or twice and store in a Ziploc bag on a shelf in my closet.

One day I will have an Alonzo wig, but until that day comes, there's a headband wig from LuvMe with my name on it.