Wildfire

song about losingI have always enjoyed Moses and the burning bush. If you really think about it, a burning bush symbolizing God is a far more powerful summary of a deity than anything relegated to an image of a mortal, made more understandable by a human face:

The image of a bush that burns without crumpling into ash juxtaposes the living and dead, two states of being held together simply by the will of the divine. directing the natural order of things with a loud voice and a pleasant ease. I wonder what Moses would have seen if he had not hid his face to avoid looking upon God? Alternatively, how many of us would have dared to look?

Put simply, 'Wildfire' is a song about a bad breakup, with its narrator caught between accepting the pain and longing for it, if only to be loved again. It also has a bit of a toxic quality to it, which I suppose just reinforces the analogy of being brutally burned by another person. So yes, I wrote it to be a breakup piece, but in light of Easter (when I cracked open a Bible during mass, and was greeted by the story of Moses) I would like to look at the song in a slanted light. The dichotomy of devotion and desperation. The state of limbo which occurs after losing something you've cherished-- unable to move on, unable to move backwards, forced continuously to relive the present.

In addition, of course, the imagery of "burning" as a whole—fire licking itself raw with striped orange tongues, branches in a greased-ash state, and smoke clogging the air—are all present. Fire maintains its own demented life cycle by repeatedly killing itself as a means of survival. I suppose there is something to be said about heartbreak, and those who've been forced to watch love slip through their fingers, coping in much the same way.

Happy reading.

...

[Verse 1]

I said ‘please’ so much I learned to hate its taste on my tongue,

but grew addicted to the wanting,

You said we’d grow old together when we were quite young,

Picked me up like I was your chosen one.

Glare in your eyes, so romanticized, our permanent perfect set-up of prophesized,

A fairytale, daydream regaled, like you knew all my deepest wants, and I,

...

[Chorus]

Like lipstick and fantasy, I felt longing. I was there, and so scared, but romantically.

You were so skillfully stealing my scenes, Moments that were kept flawless,

-

A moonlit gleam, on rose-gold tiles,

expensive goals for both of us, The sacredness of careful deception, Before your wildfire,

-

You were a fireball. ...

[Verse 2]

Can you lobotomize me and then assure me that all will be well? Get rid of the desperate thoughts in my head. I was so ready for your promise that you’d stay,

But you took everything from me. -

I dispelled a mirage, a loving man, It all vanished like a hat trick by a wizard. The coldest day, the darkest night,

When I want to cry, I look for my comfort. -

[Chorus]

And it was like lipstick and fantasy to long for, I was there, and so scared, but romantically.

You were stealing scenes so damn beautifully,

Moments that were kept flawless, ...

[Bridge]

An apocalypse, my friends and I,

"You'll get through this, and everything will be fine," The ugly truth, the soothing lies,

“He wanted me, he changed his mind,”

...

[Chorus]

Additionally, your blistering wildfire A torrid mess on my clean page,

The end-all of my everything,

Hope springs eternal, but I miss me,

-

I now beg for additional surgery, to skillfully separate you from me, But the burns are there, they’ll never leave,

you were a wildfire.